Darkened Ice
by Twin-Lance
Summary: After Squall's nearly killed on a mission, he awakens to find that he is blind. Although the gang is there for him, he still has to depend most on the one person he's afraid his handicap will push away. This is the first of my "New Beginnings" Final Fantasy VIII Series.
1. Not an Ordinary SeeD Exam

Disclaimer: I don't own final fantasy VIII, squaresoft does.  
  
Author's Note: This fic isn't going to be an action fic despite the first chapter. Hopefully this story will have a bit more emotion in it. Also, this is the first story in a series of stories that I'm going to write. All the stories will deal with different characters while still conjoining with one another. Just so you know, in the later chapters of this fic there'll be references to other characters and events that may not be fully explained. This is because they're covered in one of the other stories that I'm posting. Enjoy.  
  
Not an Ordinary Seed Exam  
  
The dead silence was nearly maddening. Not even crickets dared to make a sound. Zell didn't blame them. All hell had broken loose here earlier, and it unfortunately didn't seem to be a over yet. Balamb Garden had been contacted by Timber officials concerning guerrilla attacks that had killed eleven civilians. Squall and Zell, along with two squads of SeeD candidates and a squad of SeeD soldiers had landed outside Timber this morning. They were suprised by the ferocity and tenacity their opponents possessed and thus had been fighting for nearly eighteen hours.  
  
Night had set in, and everything had grown silent. A very weak breeze stirred the tips of the tall grass in the open fields, stirring up the smell of ash and gunpowder, while bringing with it the smell of a promised rain. Both Squall and Zell where out near the west-side railroad tracts. Neither had eaten nor slept in nearly twenty hours as they continued their search for their missing men wearily. A steady rain began to fall to further dampen their spirits.  
  
Squall closed his eyes as Zell slid down the embankment and into the mud below. He used his already muddy hand to try and wipe away the mud Zell had splashed up onto his face.  
  
"So much for SeeD protocol," Zell whispered as he crawled over to where Squall knelt. They both lay under the cover of the heavy brush as they watched for any enemy activity.  
  
"When was our last contact with the second part of squad A?" Squall asked.  
  
"Two hours ago. The remainder of group A made it back with some pretty intense injuries. Squads B and C are accounted for as well," Zell whispered. Both SeeDs crawled further from their cover as they started across the field. "Reinforcements won't be in for about another quarter hour. They're going to have to fly them in."  
  
Squall nodded in reply and then nodded his head towards a parked train. "We'll take shelter over there," He whispered his response and began crawling in that direction. Zell followed him slowly, as he dragged himself through the accumulating mud and water. When they finally reached the train, they crawled underneath and lay resting on the wood planks between the tracks.  
  
"Damn its coming down," Zell whispered. "I think I'm getting a sore throat."  
  
"Me too. Just don't cough," Squall answered. "We're only a quarter of a mile away from their base. Assuming our source was telling the truth."  
  
"He's been reliable in the past," Zell said quietly.  
  
"True," Squall whispered. "Enough waiting around." Squall began crawling along the tracks, wincing at every splinter and sharp rock that stabbed into his palms. This was definitely a mission he wouldn't likely forget solely because of it's longevity. Nothing had worked out according to plan. At least not for his SeeDs. Their plan had fallen apart, they'd been separated, half severely wounded, and now three were unaccounted for. This was already beginning to shape up to be an even longer night.  
  
"We need to get up on the other side of that loading platform," Zell responded.  
  
"I know. Quiet," Squall hissed as he laid flat on the ground and watched an enemy soldier walk past. Once the man had entered the building they'd been watching, Squall and Zell crawled out from under the train and hurried across the opening to the edge of the platform. Using the moon- less night as a mask of darkness, they jumped to the other side of the tracks and ran up to the side of the building.  
  
They both peered through a small opening to see a fight in progress. Squall noticed with some unease that the interior of the building was on fire.  
  
"We need to get in there," Squall whispered to Zell. No sooner than he had spoken those words, the sound of rotors began to break through the steady rain. "Lets move before they realize what's going on!" Squall ordered as he kicked the door in and entered, wielding lionheart before him.  
  
The scene before them was one for sore eyes. The three captured SeeDs had regained a somewhat control on the situation. Two of their enemies were unconscious in the corner and one was lying on the ground, his hands and ankles clasped tightly with a whip.  
  
"Commander!" The female officer shouted. "Reed is down. Please tell me those choppers are for us."  
  
"Go on ahead. I'll get him," Squall ordered as he ran over to where the fallen SeeD lay. Zell waited as the other two SeeDs ran out to the helicopters and watched the unconscious men in the corner.  
  
"What do you want me to do with them?" Zell shouted over the sound of a growing flame. "We can't let them just burn." He looked at Squall, who was hoisting the injured SeeD over his shoulder and nearing the door.  
  
"You'll do nothing! They have fought for and will die for their cause!" The third guerrilla fighter shouted from his position lying on the floor. Zell and Squall turned quickly having momentarily forgotten about the third, and conscious man.  
  
"Oh shit!" Zell shouted as he watched the man kick over an oxygen tank. "Squall!" Squall realized what was going on with just enough time to turn and began to make a run for it. The building went up in a fireball, throwing Zell a few dozen feet through the air. He landed on the gravel next to a set of railway tracks and slid a few feet before he stopped moving. He sat up dazed and looked around. He could hear the shouts of fellow SeeDs as they came running towards him. "Squall!" He shouted as he began to panic. He jumped up and ran past his rescuers. "Where is he?" He shouted as he ran towards the building. He stopped short of where the flames burned and looked around. A horribly sick sensation began to fill the pit of his stomach as he looked around. "Oh no," He whispered. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw two forms. He ran as hard as he could to the other side of the loading platform and stopped quickly. He dropped to the ground and grasped Squall's limp form. "Someone get over here!" He screamed. Zell tried to wipe away the blood that was plastering Squall's hair to his face with no avail. He placed his right hand over the wide gash on the side of his friend's head.  
  
Zell knew he should've checked the other SeeD as well, but he found he couldn't move. A SeeD is trained to be prepared to handle the deaths of those that they know, but it was completely different when the person who's dying is lying in your arms and nothing you do seems to be helping.  
  
There's chapter one. I promise it'll get better. One warning though. This fic isn't going to have too much action in it. I hope you guys appreciate this. I'm taking time out of my study time to type this and my finals are tomorrow. Now that that's out of the way. Please review. It would really make my day. But no flames please. 


	2. Nothingness Void

Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy 8 or any of the characters.  
  
Author's note: This takes place only a few months after the game. I don't know how close Squall and Rinoa got during the game. There was a freak accident that resulted in my dog getting tangled up in my playstation cord and dragging it outside. It wasn't until here recently that I found my memory card. Hopefully it'll still work because I've yet to beat it. But just so you know, this fic will center around Squall and Rinoa. The other characters will also be in it too, just not as much.  
  
Squall and Rinoa are together before this starts. Squall's just worried about how Rinoa will react to what happened. Especially considering she has yet to say how she feels about him.  
  
One last thing: thoughts in this story will be showed with '....' and spoken words with "..."  
  
Nothingness Void  
  
Footsteps echoed immensely loud in his still tender ears. He grimaced, resulting in a sharp stab of pain that cut across his forehead. Confused, he lay unmoving, trying to figure out where he was. He fought to stay conscious. His body desperately fought him. He balled up what felt like a very weak fist in an attempt to prove to himself that this was real. The footsteps grew louder, even more so than the beeping of a machine off to his left. 'Am I in a hospital?' He asked himself. 'How did I get here?'  
  
"Squall? Can you hear me?" A familiar voice asked. An almost motherly voice. A mother would be nice right now, he felt like his head had been run over. He tried to answer, but the words didn't want to form in his throat. "Squall?" She asked again. It was Dr. Kadowaki he realized. Something was wrong, she was being to patient and gentle. He tried to speak again only to succeed in a cough. "You caught a bit of a cold on your last mission." She sounded sad. It made him nervous. He tried to open his eyes. He had to see her face to know what was wrong. He groaned a bit when he realized that there was a bandage covering his eyes as well as most of the top of his head.  
  
His head was throbbing, but over it's pounding he knew he heard a familiar groan. It was Zell. Flashbacks of his mission began playing rapidly through his mind. He began to remember the rain, crawling under the train, the building, and Zell's face in the building. What had happened to Zell?  
  
"Zell?" He finally managed to whisper.  
  
He felt Dr. Kadowaki's hand check his pulse before she adjusted his IV. "I'll be right back," She said quietly. For that he thanked her. She had to know his head hurt. He noticed her footsteps trailed off into what he assumed was the second room. The infirmary was dead silent, aside from the movement of sheets. Squall had to know what was going on. He struggled to try and sit up but his head was still spinning. He could hear Zell again. The pained sounds of his normally hyper and jovial friend suprised him. It made him sick at his stomach. He should've been more observant. Zell was hurt and it was his fault.  
  
After a few minutes Dr. Kadowaki returned to his bedside. He could feel her checking the bandage on his leg.  
  
"Zell?" He managed to ask.  
  
"He'll be fine," She answered. "He suffered some burns and some deep cuts from where he was thrown by the explosion. It's nothing too serious." He felt a small bit of reassurance in her voice but he still wanted to see Zell for himself. He once again tried to sit up, but he felt her hand push him back onto his bed. "Not yet. I need to explain your injuries." His heart momentarily forgot to beat.  
  
'Explain my injuries? What the hell does that mean?' He fought the urge to panic. "T..this isn't good is it?" He struggled to ask as his throat began to throb. The sound of little wheels rolling towards his bed told him she was pulling up her stool. Yet another bad sign. He could feel all of his limbs, and for the most part he could move them, so he knew he hadn't lost any of them.  
  
Dr. Kadowaki placed her hand on his right bicep causing him to jump a bit in suprise. "Sorry," She whispered. He felt her release his arm and start pulling at the bandage on his head. "It's amazing you're still alive," She started talking as she let go of his bandage and opted to give him an injection instead. "This is just for pain. You've already received the injection to fight off your cold." The sterilizer felt icy cold on his skin. Every sensation felt new, as if they hadn't been experienced in a long time. He hadn't felt the needle at first, but it stung as she began to pull it out. "There," She whispered almost hesitantly. "Everyone in Garden has been waiting for you to wake up. You've been out for four days." Squall tried to turn to face her, not that he could see with the bandage on his face. Her hand ran up the length of his forearm as she started to undo the bandage once again. "Do you remember how you ended up here?"  
  
"An explosion," He whispered. Finally, his words were getting easier to say.  
  
"Yes," She answered sadly. "Mitchell, the SeeD you carried out, is recovering nicely. You saved his life Squall. Just like Zell saved yours." At her last words he began to grow scared. He didn't like how she was making him feel. "You were thrown by the blast as well. But when you landed, you hit your head on the concrete dock of the landing platform. You were knocked unconscious. You actually went into shock out there. If it weren't for Zell holding his hands over your wound you probably would've bled to death." His heart began to beat faster, making the annoying machine off to his side beep quicker. "You should be able to heal most of your injuries within a month to six weeks."  
  
"Most?" He asked with a shaky voice.  
  
"Squall, do you have someone you wouldn't mind staying with for a while?" Dr. Kadowaki asked hesitantly. "This isn't easy for me to say. I can't guarantee that you'll get your vision back."  
  
Squall stopped breathing momentarily as what she said sunk in. "I'm blind?" He managed to ask.  
  
"Yes," She answered as she removed the last of the bandage on his face.  
  
'No, I can't be,' His mind argued. As soon as he felt the pressure on his eyes lift up he opened them to be rewarded nothing. His body jerked as he felt the sudden sensation that he was falling. He sat up quickly, trying to fight off the maddening feeling. His eyes darted around trying to find the slightest image that would defy what he'd just been told. All he found was a darkened void. He found it difficult to stand up as his body wasn't sure which way was down.  
  
"Your balance will come to you in time," She reassured. He sat on the edge of the bed and looked down to where he knew the floor would be if he could see. He could hear her leaving his side as someone entered the room.  
  
Heavy footsteps approached him. The bed sunk in a bit as someone else sat next to him. There was an uneasy silence. "How ya feelin?" Irvine asked as he sat next to him. Squall merely shook his head. "The Doc said ya have to room with one of us until you find your bearings." There was a silent moment before he continued. "Selphie and Quistis are still up in Esthar with their team. And well, Zell's kinda out of it so that leaves me and Rinoa."  
  
Squall closed his eyes. He was beginning to feel sick. "How's Zell?"  
  
"He'll be fine," Irvine answered. "He just got a little cut up." He felt Irvine wrap his arm around his shoulder and pull him closer. "Listen man, you're more than welcome to bunk with me. But, if you'd rather stay with your sweetie I'll understand."  
  
"Where is she?" Squall began to feel abandoned.  
  
"She's up in your room. Trying to clean some things up so you won't trip over them. I think she's trying to figure out how to ask you if she can stay with you," Irvine answered. He caught the worried and betrayed look that passed across Squall's face. "She's been sleeping on the bench by the wall since they brought you in. Doc had to run her out and make her go get something to eat. She's been worried about you man."  
  
"But does she know?" Squall asked.  
  
"Oh yeah," Irvine answered.  
  
Squall sat quietly for a moment before he answered. "I should get to my room."  
  
Irvine nodded and stood up. "Here let me give ya a hand," He said as he pulled Squall into a standing position. "You've already been cleared to leave." Squall reluctantly allowed Irvine to brace him up as they began walking slowly to the door. "It's okay man. I'm not going to walk you into anything." Squall just swallowed nervously and clung tighter to his friend. He was beginning to feel like the floor was moving. He winced as he realized his right calf was injured.  
  
"What's wrong with my leg?" Squall asked.  
  
"You got burned," Irvine answered as he continued to lead the Commander to the door.  
  
"It hurts," Squall mumbled.  
  
"I bet it does," Irvine waited for the door to slide open. "Step up a bit. Don't trip over the door's track." Regardless of Irvine's warning, Squall still stumbled a bit. He reached desperately to Irvine's jacket for support. "Easy," Irvine cautioned. "I won't let ya hit the floor."  
  
Despite Irvine's reassurances, Squall couldn't help but feel that he was never going to make it to his room. He was dizzy from feeling like he was going to fall over, and ended up leaning heavily on Irvine's shoulder. The hall seemed to be dead silent, with the exception of the fountains and their footsteps. They were nearing the dormitory halls. He could tell by the muffled sounds their boots made as they stepped onto the carpet. "How do my eyes look?" Squall asked finally.  
  
Irvine stopped walking and Squall assumed was looking at his eyes. "They look a bit hazed, kinda like you just woke up from a deep sleep, or like you're sick. You're left one's red though.  
  
"Red?" Squall asked.  
  
"Yeah. The doc said that a few capillaries busted when you fell. She said that the redness will go away within a week."  
  
Squall started backing up and fell down. He could hear Irvine kneeling down beside him. "I can't go in there."  
  
"Sure ya can," Irvine answered as he pulled Squall up.  
  
"No I can't. I'm useless to her now," Squall said. "I'm a blinded knight. I can't protect her now."  
  
He heard Irvine smile. "That was like the most beautiful thing I've ever heard you say." Squall turned his head to the ground to try and ignore his friend. "Don't worry man," Irvine said as he led him up to his dorm. "She loves you too."  
  
Squall stood frozen where Irvine let go of him. He turned to where Irvine was standing. The door slid open with a quick hiss.  
  
"Squall?" A shaky and scared voice asked. He turned his head to look in her direction as his chest began to tighten in anticipation of how she'd react.  
  
There's chapter two. Finals are over so I have some spare time to devote to my stories. Hope you guys are enjoying this. I enjoy getting your reviews. 


	3. Comfort of Darkness

Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy VIII. I've said that so many times between this story and the other that I don't feel like being creative with the disclaimer anymore. Sorry if you look forward to those kinds of little things.  
  
And as in all of my stories, thoughts will be shown with '...' and spoken words "..."  
  
Comfort of Darkness  
  
Her voice sounded scared and uncertain. It made him want to run to her and hold her, and yet at the same time he almost wanted to die. Could she be having second thoughts about him? Squall stood fixed in the doorway. He couldn't decide what he should do. Each breath came a little harder with every heart beat. He was afraid of this. He was afraid she'd become scared. Her soft footsteps barely made a sound as she rushed over to him.  
  
'She's not wearing any shoes. She's not in a rush to leave if she's not wearing her shoes,' His mind screamed.  
  
"Squall!" Rinoa cried as she wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him gently. She caught him off guard, causing him to stumble a bit. He somehow managed to regain his balance and soon realized that she had pulled out of the hug and was making sure he didn't fall over. Once he was standing again without assistance, Rinoa pulled him into another hug. "I was so worried." She whispered.  
  
"I um, am gonna be gettin' down to the cafeteria. I'll be back in a little bit," Irvine said quietly as he walked off. Squall barely heard him over the pounding of his heart. Rinoa's hand slid down his arm as she pulled him inside his room. He resisted a bit and stumbled foreword.  
  
"Oh I'm sorry," Rinoa apologized. Squall just shook his head and then winced at the pain it caused. He felt Rinoa's arms around him to steady him in an instant. Her touch felt so comforting and reassuring. Why had he never noticed that before? He allowed her arms to remain where they were and soon wrapped his around her as well. "You must be so scared," Her voice came out muffled as she buried her face in his neck.  
  
'You have no idea,' He thought to himself. "Yeah, I guess so." She pulled away, and he could imagine her giving him an odd look. "Everything's just different. I just feel like I'm in a dream and I keep expecting to wake up." He could feel her breath on his neck so he knew she was pulling him into another hug.  
  
"I wish this were a dream, for your sake. I can't imagine what it's like," She answered. They stood in silence for a few minutes just holding each other and listening to the sound of one another's breathing. "Do you want to get changed?" She hesitantly asked. Squall was silent for a moment. He could tell he was wearing some type of hospital garb, but it hadn't really occurred to him that he'd need to change. His main concern had been just getting to his room without accident.  
  
"Uh, yeah. I think there's a pair of jogging pants in one of my drawers," He answered. He could feel her hands release him as she walked to his dresser. She opened and closed a few drawers before he heard her stand up and come over to him. "You don't mind if I just leave this shirt off do you?" He asked her as he took his pants from her.  
  
"No," She answered. "You don't need help getting dressed or anything do you?" Her voice sounded a bit anxious and he could hear her shifting her weight from as she no doubt stared at the floor in embarrassment.  
  
He stood there a little suprised by the question. "I think I can do it all right." He answered. "Can you show me which way the bathroom is?" He asked as he tried to feel around for a wall or piece of furniture to guide him.  
  
"Sure," She said, obviously relieved that he didn't need her assistance changing. He allowed her to lead him across the room and to the bathroom door. "There you go." Squall slowly stepped in and reached for the sink to ensure that he wouldn't trip over the toilet. He didn't even want to imagine how humiliating that would be; especially if he hit his head again and ended up back in the infirmary. Once he had his balance, he pushed the door shut and leaned against the wall. Kicking his foot up on the lip of the sink, he quickly unlaced his boot and then proceeded to do the next one.  
  
"This isn't too hard," He tried to encourage himself. After kicking off his boots, he slid down the wall. His head was beginning to spin again. Dizziness was not a sensation he was fond of, and he really didn't want to shout for help. He groaned to himself as he worked his way out of his pants and fumbled with the ones Rinoa had given him. He became mad after a few minutes of not finding the tag which would indicate the back from the front, so he just dropped them in his lap and rested his head across the wall.  
  
"Are you hungry?" Rinoa asked on the other side of the door.  
  
"Yeah," He answered. "I don't know how much I can hold down though."  
  
"Are you feeling sick?"  
  
"A little," He replied. 'Hah! There it is!' He thought to himself as he found the tag and proceeded to pull on the pants. Feeling a little better, now that he wasn't sitting with his skin on the cold floor, he pulled his shirt off quickly and tossed it over to where the clothes hamper was supposed to be.  
  
"Do you mind if Irvine eats with us?" Rinoa asked.  
  
"I don't care," Squall groaned as he tried to stand up without falling down. He managed to stand straight up, only to stumble into the sink. "Shit!" He cried out in pain.  
  
"Are you okay!" Rinoa cried from the other side of the door. He could hear where she had a hold of the door knob and was debating whether or not she should barge in.  
  
"Yeah. I'm fine," He answered as he reached a hand over to open the door. "Damn sink," He mumbled.  
  
Rinoa giggled a bit, and it in turn caused him to smile a little.  
  
"It's not funny, that hurt," He grinned a little.  
  
"Do you need me to kiss it for you?" She teased as she ran her hands up his chest and around his neck. He carefully nuzzled his nose through her hair as he breathed in her scent. "Oooh, this is new," She said as she pulled one hand down to run it over his right pectoral muscle. He knew she was talking about the tattoo he'd gotten a few weeks before. It wasn't anything big, just a delicate angel, clad in a blue gown, examining a sword. He just hadn't gotten around to showing it to her yet. "It looks like my lion's got a soft spot for angels," She teased as she ran her fingers through his hair in a playful, yet careful manner.  
  
He smiled in response. At least she seemed to like it. "Only one angel really," He answered as she went back to running her fingers over it. He barely resisted the urge to jump as her fingers brushed lightly against his skin. She leaned against him again, and he was relieved to find that he was doing better standing on his own this time. He leaned down to kiss her cheek lightly right as someone knocked at the door. "That would be Irvine," She said as she broke away from him and hurried to open the door. Squall crossed his arms in annoyance and then slowly began walking into the room. He could hear every heavy step that Irvine made as he meandered through the door. Squall made his way to the side of his bed as he sat down beside it.  
  
"Hey man. Hope you're hungry," Irvine greeted him. He could hear the cowboy sit two trays down on the floor as he sat down across from him. "Hey, that's a pretty cool tattoo."  
  
Squall nodded a bit at the compliment and then waited for Rinoa's lead on when to eat. She sat down beside him and then leaned over his lap to get a few items off of the tray.  
  
"All right. I didn't really know what you guys wanted so I got a little of everything," Irvine explained. "Let's see, I got, two cheeseburgers, three hot-dogs, a salad, a bagel, please don't ask me how that got in the dinner line, what I think is goulash, potato salad, grilled cheese and tomato soup. For drinks, I grabbed a few cans of soda, two glasses of water and a glass of weak tea. But you don't have to drink the tea if you don't want to. I just got it because the Doc said you were sick."  
  
Squall cringed a bit of the thought of weak tea. "What do you want?" He asked Rinoa.  
  
"You first, you're the sick one," Rinoa said as she leaned against his shoulder.  
  
"Tomato soup and a hot-dog," Squall answered. "And I guess I'll have water to drink." He could hear both of them moving around to get what he'd asked for. They were trying to help he knew, but he didn't want to appear so helpless.  
  
"Here," Rinoa took his left hand and guided it to where his soup was. She then moved it to the right to show him where the hot-dog was.  
  
"Squall," Irvine nudged his hand with the glass. "I'm sittin' it right here."  
  
"Thanks," Squall said absently to them. He listened as they carried on a conversation. They were saying something about this year's garden festival. As carefully as he could, he picked up the bowl before him, placing a thumb inside the dish so he could tell when it was about to spill over. He found the spoon to much trouble to work with, so he proceeded to sip the soup while he listened to them talk about Selphie's plans.  
  
"Hey Squall, did ya ever get to hear the outcome of the SeeD exam?" Irvine asked. Squall shook his head as he sat the half empty bowl down. "I made SeeD," Irvine's voice sounded like he was grinning from ear to ear.  
  
"Was there ever a doubt?" Squall congratulated his friend.  
  
"Actually, every candidate that participated passed."  
  
Squall stared in shock to where Irvine sat. "Are you serious? Everyone?"  
  
Irvine began laughing. "Yeah. Scary ain't it. Seifer's a SeeD." Squall turned to Rinoa.  
  
"Cid went ahead and announced that everyone passed. We just haven't held the ball yet. They wanted you to at least be present for it," Rinoa answered.  
  
"I don't have to be there," Squall said after a long pause, not liking where the conversation was heading.  
  
"Sure ya do. They need to see that yur okay," Irvine responded quickly.  
  
"I'm not okay!" Squall snapped as he knocked his glass over. "Shit," He mumbled.  
  
"I got it," Irvine jumped up and Squall could only assume he was rushing to get a towel.  
  
"I'm not completely helpless," Squall protested.  
  
"I never said ya were," Irvine knelt down quickly and wiped up the water. Squall just rested his head on his hand. "I guess I'll talk to you guys tomorrow."  
  
"Okay. Thanks," Rinoa answered as she helped him pick up the trays. "Squall, do you want to keep some of this food here?"  
  
"I'm not that hungry," He lied.  
  
"Oh, okay," Rinoa picked up the dishes around him and followed Irvine to the door. Squall climbed up on his bed and stared up at the ceiling. He used to stared at this ceiling for hours contemplating how confusing his life was and how much he hated its mismatched colors. Now he just wished he could see the three different shades of beige the ceiling was covered in to complain about. He could hear Rinoa coming towards him. He loved the way she walked when barefoot. So careful and delicate. Like a fragile flower, the complete opposite of everything else in his life. "Do you mind if I stay here?" She asked.  
  
"If you don't mind," He answered from where he lay.  
  
"I want to stay here with you," She answered. He closed his eyes tightly in relief. "Let me change real quick," She continued. "Do you mind if I wear one of your t-shirts?"  
  
"I don't care," He answered as he took a few breaths to calm himself down. 'She's not going anywhere so stop worrying,' he tried unsuccessfully to settle his stomach. The bed sunk down as Rinoa laid down. "How long will you stay?"  
  
"As long as you'll let me," Rinoa reassured him as she wrapped her arms around him and snuggled in close to his warmth. "I'll be here waiting for you. Everyday for as long as you want me." He didn't respond verbally, but she heard a few raspy breaths as a few tears ran down his cheeks. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her closer to him.  
  
They lay there in one of the most comfortable moments they'd had yet. Through the darkness, Rinoa could tell he looked more at ease than he had since he'd come up to his room. She raised her left hand and ran it through his hair. "I love you Squall Leonhart," She whispered as she prepared to kiss him. She stopped short when she realized that he was already sleeping soundly.  
  
************************************************************************ There's chapter three! Hope you guys liked it. How 'bout that ending? This story's actually coming pretty easy. Please review. I really appreciate them and they do speed up my story writing process. 


	4. Tumbling Down

Disclaimer: Final Fantasy VIII isn't mine. :( Squaresoft isn't mine. :( Squall isn't mine. :(  
  
Moving right along, thoughts are '...' spoken words "..." You guys should know the drill by now. I hope.  
  
Tumbling Down  
  
He found her in a field of flowers. She turned to him and smiled. He was lost in the depth of her almond eyes as he felt himself being drawn to her. The old Squall would've seen this as a giddy and foolish reaction, a weakness in his armor that he wore to ward off the world around him. The new Squall however, was beginning to look for something, someone to hold on to. She wrinkled her nose and motioned for him to come closer with a playful hand gesture. He was under her spell, and soon began chasing her as they played in the meadow. He stumbled a bit, causing them to both fall down. At first he was worried that he'd hurt her, but she began laughing when he looked down to check on her. A grin came to his lips as well, as her laughter and the beauty of her smile imprinted themselves in his memory. It was the last thing he saw before everything began growing dark.  
  
Squall opened his eyes as soon as he woke up to be greeted with darkness. His first instinct was that a storm was coming in Balamb Harbor and there just wasn't any sunlight. When he turned to look out the window, he realized that everything was black. He cried out in suprise and jumped a bit in reflex as he tried to figure out why he couldn't see.  
  
"Squall?" Her voice was soft and reassuring, as was her touch. He closed his eyes tightly thinking that maybe he was still dreaming after all. The blankets next to him shifted as she raised up and ran her hand along his back. "Are you okay?" She asked. He sat silent, secretly trying to build up the courage to open his eyes again. She ran her other hand along his collar bone, up his neck and then onto his face. He forced himself to slowly open his eyes and look at her, but he was only greeted with darkness.  
  
"Why can't I see?" He asked almost panicked. Squall reached out one of his arms to touch her.  
  
"Don't you remember?" She asked. "You were injured on the SeeD mission five days ago." A disbelieving look crossed his face.  
  
"I thought that was a dream," He whispered quietly. Rinoa didn't reply, she just held on to him tighter. Neither one of them moved for quite some time. She hadn't a clue what to say to console him, and he wasn't sure what to do. Once he composed himself, he ran his hand up her arm and to her cheek. He leaned in slowly so that their foreheads were touching. His body began to get shaky with nervousness. "Thanks for staying," He whispered almost feeling foolish.  
  
"Any time," She answered as she tilted her head back and kissed his lips lightly. He was suprised by the contact, mainly because he couldn't see what was going on around him. Nevertheless, he didn't leave her wanting. Squall deepened the kiss as they sat there together. He was comfortable here. He didn't have to worry about someone telling them how cute they were or Irvine with a damn camcorder.  
  
Rinoa raised her hands up around his neck as she relaxed in his hold around her waist. They laid back down on the bed and became absorbed in each other. Her taste was something still foreign to Squall regardless of how many times they'd kissed. She ran her hands through his hair as she encouraged him to continue. He let his right hand to drift down her side, but he retracted it in reluctance and fear. Now wasn't the time, regardless of how much he wanted it. She was here now, but he couldn't chance scaring her off. The ringing of the phone next to the bed startled them, and brought them back to the realization of where they were. Squall took a few deep breaths and raised up, reaching for the receiver. His hand knocked off the alarm clock in the process, but he felt Rinoa's hand under his to catch it.  
  
"Nice catch," He smiled as he put the receiver to his ear. "Hello?" His expression became slightly annoyed and then sour. "Where are you?" Rinoa sat behind him on the bed as she tried to guess who he was talking to. "How long will it be before you get here?" He closed his eyes and laid back on the bed. "I'm fine," it sounded like he was protesting. "No don't bring him. What? Okay fine. No, I'm getting in the shower. Bye." He hung up the phone and then buried his face in his hands.  
  
"What's wrong?" Rinoa asked as she laid down next to him and wrapped her arms around his waist.  
  
"That was Selphie. She and Quistis are two hours away. My fa, I mean Laguna's with them," He almost looked mad. "I don't want there to be a scene." He raised up. "I'm taking a shower," He pushed himself up slowly and staggered around for a minute. Rinoa watched as he felt his way over to his closet. He pulled out a pair of black pants and a white shirt. Once he found his way to the dresser, she got up.  
  
"I'm going to run up to my room real quick and get some clean clothes. Will you be okay?" She asked.  
  
"Yeah," He hoped. "Hurry back." He added for good measure.  
  
"Ok," She said as she pulled on her shorts and rushed out the door.  
  
Squall stepped in the bathroom and felt around. This would be no problem. He dropped his clothes on the floor and turned on the water. 'I can do this,' He said to himself. He undressed and slowly stepped in, shutting the door behind him. The warm water running through his hair felt calming. He stood in silence just concentrating on how the water felt. It was amazing how much his other four senses picked up on now that he'd lost his vision. He washed his hair, and what part of his head that he could. His arms were still achy as he washed off the rest of his body. 'I must still be sick.' He turned off the water, deciding that he'd washed up enough. When he turned to slide open the door, he slipped and fell against the back wall of the shower. He ended up sitting on the floor. All the shower stalls in Garden's dorms were small, that was common knowledge, but they'd never felt this small before. He felt around the walls for a minute. It seemed as if the shower was getting smaller by the minute. His fingers found the gap by the door and he flung the door open quickly. He stepped out quickly, and slid down on the floor. "Damn it," He groaned to himself. Grabbing the towel off the rack, he wrapped it around himself and leaned against the bathroom wall. He had never been claustrophobic, but he'd heard that there was a first time for everything. A knock came at the door, startling him a bit.  
  
"Squall?" It was Rinoa. He released a breath he didn't realize he was holding. "Are you okay in there?"  
  
"Yeah," He answered as he opened the door and allowed her in. "You can have the shower, I'll change out here." Squall picked up his fresh change in clothes and carefully stepped past her, into his room.  
  
She shut the bathroom door and looked around at the water that covered the floor and the disarrayed shower interior. Rinoa cast a quick glance back to the bedroom door before she picked everything up and climbed in the shower herself.  
  
Squall paced the middle of his floor. Each time he began stepping forward he received the sensation that he was about to run into something head first. It was beginning to get unnerving. The phone began ringing again, ending his thoughts. He could hear the shower still going so he had to answer it. First he had to find it. He turned on his heel, and for the first time since the accident, proceeded to move quickly.  
  
He had only a general idea as to where he was standing, so it came as a suprise when his shins hit the side of his desk chair. He tumbled forward, fell down and landed on his shoulder. "Aah damn it," He yelled as he reached his left hand up to the night-stand where his phone rested. "Hello?" He asked as he tried to climb back up to his feet. 'This had better be good,' He thought to himself. "Yes ma'am. Okay. Give me about fifteen minutes. Bye." He hung up the phone annoyed. He hated going to the infirmary. With the tips of his fingers, he rubbed his temples. 'If it wasn't for Rin this would be a complete nightmare,' He thought to himself as he resumed his pacing. Without realizing it, Squall stepped part of the way down on Angelo's paw. A shrill yelp shattered the silence, causing Squall to jump backwards and fall over the already fallen chair. He landed on his back with enough force to knock the breath out of him. He lay there partially stunned by what had happened. His legs dangled over the chair as he pushed himself up on his elbows. The bathroom door slid open and Rinoa stepped out quickly. He could hear her rushing over to him.  
  
"Are you okay?" She asked as she pushed the chair out from under his legs. She pulled him up into a sitting position as she knelt down beside him. He rubbed his palm against his forehead while he collected his thoughts.  
  
"I've noticed you ask that question a lot here lately," He mumbled as he rested his head on her shoulder. Rinoa giggled softly and looked around for poor Angelo. She found him hiding under the bed, his rubber nose just barely sticking out from underneath it.  
  
************************************************************************ Rinoa36 - He wasn't supposed to say that. I actually had two versions of that chapter, the only difference being that one line. I think I uploaded the wrong one. Ooops! lol Thanks for catching that.  
  
Optical Goddess - That's why I wrote the story. I think it'd be a struggle for him.  
  
Squall the Stampede - Thanks, I'll try and get around to your stuff. Could be a little while though.  
  
Rinoica - Expect this to happen next?  
  
Black-Rose72 - Here it is, hope you like it.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
I only have one question. Would you guys like to be left guessing at the end of chapters, or would you rather have little previews to hold you over? Anyway, keep reviewing and I'll keep updating. :) 


	5. Mitchell

Disclaimer: I hereby declare that Final Fantasy VIII and all of it's publications and merchandise are the property of Squaresoft and any other companies it has chosen to merge with. Put simply, I'm just a fan writing for fun and for free.  
  
Mitchell  
  
Squall pushed what was left of his bagel around on his plate. His mind dully acknowledged that he was still hungry. He was too busy listening to the commotion going on around him. It had been suggested that they eat in the cafeteria so that the students and faculty could see he was alive and so that he could get acclimated to the garden with his new impairment. He self-consciously scooted a little closer to Rinoa.  
  
"Something wrong?" She asked quietly. He shook his head and turned to a section of the cafeteria that grew suddenly silent.  
  
"What's going on?" He whispered. It was bad enough he still felt like he was floating in a void, but now it felt like people were watching his every unsure movement. Their gazes were making him nervous. He began to feel as if they were waiting for him to knock something over or mess something up so they'd have something to talk about.  
  
"The ones in the corner are glancing this way," She answered. "But they aren't staring. Just sneaking glances to see that you're actually here."  
  
"I feel like I'm on display," He stated plainly as he resumed picking at his food.  
  
"Oh you," Rinoa teased. "They just want to see that you're here and recovering," She chose her words carefully. Rinoa ran a reassuring hand down his arm before she then resumed eating her own breakfast. "Aren't you going to finish that?"  
  
"I don't want an audience while I eat," He mumbled, trying to dodge the prying ears that sat around him. He felt Rinoa's hand squeeze his arm as she scooted a bit closer to him.  
  
"I can fix that," She whispered. He wondered vaguely what she was going to do, but then decided that it didn't matter. She could use her powers on the mass around him and he wouldn't care at the moment. "Sit over there," Rinoa spoke again. Squall glanced at her questioningly. "Not you," She joked. "Irvine. We'll use him as a shield." Squall grinned and then turned to where he heard Irvine sitting down.  
  
"So, how'd your visit with Kadowaki go?" Irvine asked as he scrapped a fork over his plate. Squall could only assume that he was eating eggs. That thought alone was enough to make him a little queasy. He could never stand the slippery squishy feel that eggs had when he ate them. For the moment, he was relieved that he couldn't see. After all, Irvine wasn't exactly a neat eater whenever Selphie wasn't around.  
  
"It was quick," Squall answered. "She finished up repairing the burns on my leg. She said while I was unconscious my body was more receptive to the curaga spells than she originally thought I'd be." He stopped talking and finally picked up his bagel. To most of the cafeteria it looked as if he were examining it, when in actuality he was deciding whether or not he could finish eating it without making a noticeable mess.  
  
"Dr. Kadowaki showed me how to clean the bandage on his head so that he doesn't have to go to the infirmary every day," Rinoa added. There was a long silence while the three ate quietly. The warning bell sounded shrilly, causing Squall to jump in suprise.  
  
"Only five more minutes and these students are gonna have to be in class," Irvine announced. Squall turned around and to anyone who knew no different, it would've looked as if he were watching his students scurrying off to their classes. Hurried footsteps and good-byes filled the air around him. He listened patiently for the end to the noise so that he might once again listen to the voices of his friends. Footsteps behind him grew increasingly loud as he realized someone was coming up to him. He was pulled from his thoughts when a hand rested on his shoulder. He turned around quickly to face the person.  
  
"It's good to see your doing better, Sir," The voice said quickly. The person squeezed his shoulder and then hurried off. Squall sat momentarily bewildered as he contemplated who had just said that.  
  
He was shocked that someone had come up to him and not pressed him about his blindness. Furthermore, he wasn't accustomed to getting encouragement from his SeeD and students. That was his job to do to them. Another hand brushed his shoulder as another student walked by.  
  
"Welcome back Sir," The girl whispered as she kept walking. Squall turned to Rinoa who put her arm over his shoulders.  
  
"Are they making you uncomfortable?" She asked. He shrugged and shook his head.  
  
"I don't know," He answered honestly. "I'm just not used to this." Rhythmic and precise footsteps caught Squall's attention. He knew that walk. It was the step of one of his professionally serious SeeDs. He waited quietly and patiently until the person stopped beside him and then knelt. Squall didn't feel uncomfortable; curious more than anything.  
  
"Commander Sir," The SeeD's voice was shaky.  
  
"Yes?" Squall asked.  
  
"Thank you Sir," The boy's voice dropped so Irvine and Rinoa couldn't hear him. "You saved my life back on that mission....I don't really know how to say this. You were nearly killed saving me, and now you're blind because of me. I guess I'm just trying to say I'm sorry for screwing up. I was the captain and I made a bad call. I'm really sorry...but thank you so much for being there." The SeeD stood up abruptly and ran towards the exit before Squall had a chance to respond.  
  
"What was that all about?" Irvine asked.  
  
"That's the guy I carried out of that building," Squall answered.  
  
"Oh," Irvine said quietly.  
  
The cafeteria finally grew silent. Squall sat quietly as he thought about what he'd been told. 'I sacrificed my sight to save his life? Is that what I did?'  
  
"Zell's been released to his room. I stopped by to see if he wanted anything to eat, but he was still sleepin'," Irvine interrupted Squall's thoughts. "He was looking a lot better." He stopped at his last comment.  
  
"I'd like to go see him," Squall said as he pushed his plate away. Hurried footsteps began echoing across the room. Squall heard Irvine jump up quickly. The quick movement caused Squall to jump up as well. He staggered back a bit and Rinoa caught his arm to steady him.  
  
"Easy," She warned as she stood up too.  
  
"Irvy, Irvy, Irvy!" A high voice squealed. "Oh I missed you," She said in her normally ecstatic voice.  
  
"I missed you too sugar bear," Irvine responded in an annoyingly lovey dovey voice. Squall could feel the blood draining from his face as his heart skipped a beat. She was definitely not someone he wanted to hear for he knew she didn't travel alone. Squall just stood there and buried his head in his hands. Selphie was there, and that meant Laguna was as well.  
  
After a few moments, Selphie turned her attention to Squall. "Hey Squall, how are you feeling?" Judging by the sound of her voice, he could tell she was rapidly approaching him.  
  
Squall just shrugged his shoulders. "I need to go see, I mean talk to Zell." Squall frowned at his own slip and reached for Rinoa's arm.  
  
"Oh come on," Selphie gave him a playful punch on the shoulder. "Don't you want to see Sir Laguna?" He felt himself getting light headed.  
  
"Actually I have other things to do," He tried to avoid the gaze he knew she had directed to him.  
  
"Oh come on Squall. He flew all the way from Esthar to see how you were doing," Selphie begged.  
  
Squall was beginning to grow annoyed with her. It wasn't that he was entirely anti-social, he was just still uncertain about some things. Mainly the man that claimed to be his father. Squall wasn't sure if he wanted Laguna to come barging in and becoming all parentally protective.  
  
"Just five minutes?" Selphie sounded like she was on the verge of tears. "He actually cried to the point that he made himself sick because he thought you were going to die."  
  
Squall wrapped his arm tightly around Rinoa's waist. He didn't know what he wanted anymore. Even his emotions were becoming confusing. Since when did he care about the moron of a president that Esthar had? He closed his eyes and rested his head on Rinoa's shoulder. "I just wish this were all a bad dream," He mumbled into her neck. "Except for you. I don't know how I'd get by without you."  
  
************************************************************************  
  
CTHKSI: Thanks, I think. Glad you liked the title.  
  
Undercovercloud: You got somethin' against Rinoa? (j/k) Thanks for reviewing.  
  
Zadkiel: Thank you for summing up exactly what I was shooting for. *gives hug*  
  
Rinoa36: Thank you, thank you and thank you.  
  
Optical Goddess: Considered it. Still trying to decide how I want to shape his character.  
  
Selphie-ish Steph: Thank you.  
  
Remote_mine: I've never been legally blind but I was accident prone as a child. I've given myself a few head injuries that momentarily knocked out my sight, so I do have a bit of an insight as to what it's like.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Sorry if it seemed short or disorganized. I wanted to give you guys another chapter because of all the reviews I received but I was having difficulty with this scene for one reason or another. I promise the next one will be better. In the mean time though. Please review. That's all I ask of you. 


	6. Reluctant Emotions

Dislaimer: I have already denounced all rumors to my ownership of Final Fantasy VIII so please don't sue me! I can barely make my truck payements as it is.  
  
Author's note: Things have been crazy here lately with the holidays and my boyfriend flying in. Do not fear though, I have remembered all of my loyal readers. It may be a little longer until the next chapter is up, but in the mean time, here's this one, and Merry Christmas.  
  
Oh yeah, thoughts are '...' and spoken words "..." Why do I usually forget that?  
  
Reluctant Emotions  
  
He had to get away from her. He didn't want to say something to her that may hurt her feelings. After all, Selphie was just trying to help. She always was. Nevertheless, Squall didn't feel like being in a close proximity to Laguna. The man was odd, and although Squall didn't want to acknowledge it, he felt himself being drawn to him. 'It must be pity,' Squall thought to himself.  
  
"Sir Laguna and Quisty should be finished unloading their things from the Ragnarok by now. I'm sure he'll want to see you," Selphie placed her hand on his arm in a persuasive gesture. Squall withdrew his arm hastily and pushed Rinoa a bit.  
  
"Can we please leave?" He asked.  
  
"Sure," Rinoa sounded a bit uncertain, but she still led him away from Selphie. After a short silence She spoke up. "She's only trying to help."  
  
Squall stopped dead in his tracks, and listened as Rinoa did the same. "Rin, I don't need this. Too much is going on right now. I need time, or something." He whispered as he grasped her by her shoulders in a desperate attempt to keep her on his side in this matter.  
  
"I know a lot is going on. I see it all," She responded in a soothing voice. "I have to agree that what you need is some time to try and get things together, but at the same time, I understand that there's a man somewhere in this garden that needs to see that you're alive." Squall turned his head to face to the floor. "I'm not saying go have a conference with him. Just go tell him that you're not feeling well and that you want to rest. Let him see that you're still breathing." Squall didn't like what she'd said even though she had a point.  
  
He slowly let his grip loosen as his hands slid down to his sides. "Whatever."  
  
"Come on," Rinoa said as she grabbed his left arm and began pulling him to the main hall. He resisted because he felt as if he were about to plow into a table or chair, and Rinoa giggled. "I've yet to lead you into a wall or piece of furniture. Come on Squall, trust me."  
  
'Trust her?' Squall thought to himself. He wanted to; but that would mean he would have to become even more dependent on her. He didn't want to be a burden, or a piece of luggage. He followed her at the same reluctant pace as before. He couldn't help it. The sensation that he was going to walk into something wouldn't go away.  
  
The main hall was nearly deserted when they stepped into it. Squall could judge that by their echoing footsteps that seemed to bounce off the far wall by the training center. 'The training center,' Thought Squall. He'd spent many hours there working off nervous energy when he knew Rinoa would be visiting from Timber. Once she'd actually moved to Garden, he trained there any moment he had for there was little time. It was a new feeling; to have someone around that always wanted to spend their time with him. He liked it. Just like when Sis used to favor him at the orphanage. It made him feel significant. He allowed his mind to ponder just how many memories of Ellone he'd lost because of his GFs. If he continued to use them, would he forget about Rin? No, he'd never have another need to use them.  
  
His former self cried out that he was giving in too easily. He'd only been blind for a few days and he was already accepting the thought of a more domesticated family life. He shook the thought from his head. He was giving himself a headache.  
  
"Squall? Is something wrong?" Rinoa asked.  
  
"I'm fine," He answered as he stuck his right hand out to touch the lip of the wall around the central fountain. He stopped walking, and leaned against the wall. They were close to one of the fish fountains, he could feel the mist off of its flow on his face. Beside him, Rinoa leaned on the wall as well. He could just picture her gazing out over the water with her beautiful eyes as a pleasant smile graced her lips. He smiled to himself at the thought. She'd taught him how to smile. Now she was teaching him how to live. He felt her arm slide between the elbows that he leaned on as she took hold of his arm. She rested her head on his shoulder as they just leaned and listened to the sound of the water.  
  
An hour later...  
  
She lay with her head on his chest and her arm possesively wrapped around his waist. He allowed his hand to travel from her waist up her side. He was trying to memorize how her shape felt. It was the closest thing he had to seeing her there next to him. The room was silent, save for the occasional scrape of Angelo's nails on the hard floor. Squall chuckled lightly that Angelo was still in hiding.  
  
"What's funny?" She whispered, almost afraid to break the silence.  
  
"Nothing," He answered, afraid to draw her attention away from him and to her traumatized dog. They'd laid there for at least thirty minutes. 'Maybe Selphie was wrong. Maybe Laguna and Quistis had a lot to unload. Maybe he got lost," Squall smiled at the thought of Laguna walking aimlessly through the halls for hours on end before he stopped to ask for help. 'I wait ten more minutes and then I'm visiting Zell,' He told himself. As if on cue, a hesitant knock came at the door. Squall didn't say anything, he just rolled closer to Rinoa.  
  
"Just let him in; get it over with," Rinoa urged. He groaned as he found the edge of the bed and slowly stood on his own. She didn't ask to guide him and he was thankful for it. His steps were slow and hesitant at first, but this was his room and he knew where everything was. 'Especially the desk chair,' He thought to himself. He'd tossed it in the closet this morning after nearly breaking his neck on it. His eyes still strained to look around. All he saw was darkness. He glanced down at where his feet were. The black darkness he saw made him feel as if the floor were gone and he'd fall any moment. He bumped into the wall because he wasn't paying attention as to how far he'd walked. His hands ran against the cold metal of the door and then slid over to the control panel. Slowly stepping back out of the way, he pressed the release and listened as the door hissed open.  
  
An uneasy silence accompanied the sharply audible footsteps. They sounded to Squall like a pair of hard-soled travel boots. Not that he paid that much attention to sounds when he had his sight, he just remembered being in D-district with Seifer. Before he could see him, he'd heard him approaching, the sound of the hard heel of his boots had been imprinted in Squall's mind.  
  
Squall turned his head to the left so that his gaze was away from the entering person. He was nervous but he couldn't understand why. Everything had gotten complicated here lately. Moving his hand from the panel, he began walking back over to the bed. He sat down quietly and then rested his head on his hands. The footsteps paced around for a moment before they paused by what Squall assumed was the desk.  
  
"Squall?" Laguna asked. Squall shot him what looked like a glance. "Sorry if I'm um, barging in on anything. I...I ...I j-just wanted to see that you were okay." There was a pause and then the sound of fabric being flattened. "Selphie and Quistis told me that there had been an accident and I freaked out."  
  
Squall stood up quietly and reached for Rinoa's hand. She quickly stood and followed his lead. He walked slowly to the door and opened it for her. "I don't know why. But I need to do this alone," He whispered.  
  
"Oh, okay," She sounded skeptical. "I guess I'll go to my room, so just call whenever you want me to come back." He stood perfectly still as he absorbed the feeling she gave him when she released his hand and allowed her fingers to run gently over his palm. After shutting the door, he turned quickly to face the man that claimed to be his father.  
  
"What exactly did they tell you to make you rush halfway across the world to get here?" He asked as he crossed his arms.  
  
"Oh, well, they said that they received a call that you had suffered a severe head injury in an accident and had almost died. They also said that um, you had gotten some bad burns on your leg. By the time they'd been called, you'd already woken up, but were still being monitored by the doctor," Laguna answered slowly. Squall frowned a bit at his response. "Did I say something wrong?"  
  
Squall shook his head and was reminded of the injury he'd suffered as a sharp pain shot across his temple. He placed a hand on it to try and ease away the pain. "That's all they said?" Squall asked.  
  
"Yeah, that's it," Laguna answered as he rubbed the toe of his boot against the floor.  
  
"Please stop that," Squall practically begged as he fought off the splitting sensation it was giving his skull. The annoying sound stopped suddenly and the room became silent. "You weren't told anything else?"  
  
"No," Laguna said. "Should I have been?" Squall shook his head a little gentler this time as he left his hand on his temple. He staggered foreword a bit as he found his night-stand; rather walked into it.  
  
"Damn it!" He said a little louder than he'd intended.  
  
Behind him he heard Laguna jump up. "Are you okay?"  
  
"I'm fine," Squall growled as he felt around until he found the edge furthest from his bed. He then stepped around it, one hand still on the piece of furniture as he searched for the window with his other hand. When he found the ledge, he leaned on it, inhaling the incoming breeze that carried the salt of the ocean with it. Considering the time of year, the air didn't seem no where near as humid as it should be. Considering his company, the room didn't seem big enough.  
  
"What wasn't I told?" Laguna sounded dead serious. Squall turned his head so that he was facing the breeze. "Something's wrong."  
  
The organ in Squall's chest tightened a bit. Part of him didn't want to tell him because it wasn't his business, and the other part of him was embarrassed for some unknown reason. Why? Then it hit him. He'd been trying to act as if nothing happened ever since Rinoa had started staying with him. If he admitted it now, then he was admitting he needed help wasn't he?  
  
"Talk to me!" Laguna burst out. He hadn't yelled, but his voice sounded so authoritative that Squall jumped and turned to face him. In the process, his knee hit the night-stand, sending the clock and phone flying to the floor. He started to reach for them, but ended up just settling for sliding down the wall and onto the floor.  
  
Squall pulled his knees up a bit an rested his arms on them. He allowed his gaze to fall to the floor. Now was definitely not the time to press him to talk. Besides, he still wanted to doubt that they were even related. He didn't want to be responsible for too many other people. Sometimes, even his friends and their problems were almost overwhelming.  
  
"Squall Leonhart," Laguna's voice came out even and stern. Squall shot him his best glare, silently wondering if his left eye were still red. He'd expected Laguna to take a step back in suprise. What he did however, was step foreword. Squall didn't like that. Laguna wasn't acting like he should've.  
  
'You're supposed to be a timid moron. Stay back,' Squall thought about his father. Fabric constricting, and the squeaking of a new boot told him that Laguna was practically in his face and kneeling down to his level. Squall just concentrated on his breathing. 'What the hell's happening to me?'  
  
"Squall, what's wrong," Laguna's voice sounded a little strained as he moved aside Squall's bangs to look at his bandage. Squall found he could do nothing. He was frozen in his seat on the floor.  
  
'What am I doing?' Squall wondered as he allowed the man to move his hair and examine his injury. He remained silent as Laguna finished his assessment and then sat down in front of him.  
  
"Talk to me," His voice sounded more like a plea than an actual request.  
  
"Why do you care? It's not your problem," Squall answered.  
  
Laguna must've been taken aback, because he withdrew himself a bit and Squall could hear him shifting around uneasily. "I-It's my business because your my son. A-Anything serious that's bothering you is my business." Squall started to stand up, but Laguna caught him halfway up and held him there against the wall. When Squall didn't put up much of a resistance, Laguna let go and took a step back. "Squall?"  
  
Squall's only response was to shoot him a quick glance before standing up and walking out into the middle of the floor. From what he could tell, Laguna still hadn't moved from the wall. He stepped a little further and tripped over the phone wire. He stumbled forward and landed on his knees. "Just leave okay!" Squall yelled as he tried to free his foot. He felt as if he were on display and Laguna was his audience. His fingers tugged at the cord that had now wrapped itself around his ankle.  
  
"Do you need help?" Laguna asked quietly.  
  
"Hell no I don't need your help! I don't need anyone's help!" Squall shouted in frustration as he continued to fight the wire. Nevertheless he could hear Laguna step closer. He could feel wind in front of his face as he stared straight ahead. The snapping of fingers caught his attention as he looked quickly at the man to his right. "What?" Squall raised an eyebrow.  
  
"You can't see," Laguna muttered more to himself than Squall. Squall turned his gaze down to the floor. He could feel his face growing hot but he couldn't determine if it were from anger or embarrassment. "Why wouldn't you tell me?" Laguna was beginning to sound hurt. "You can tell me anything." Squall's face felt as if it were growing hotter by the instant. Something tugged at his ankle, and he reached a hand down there in time to brush Laguna's as he pulled the cord away.  
  
"I didn't need your help," Squall whispered as he pulled his knees up to his chest.  
  
"I didn't say you did," Laguna answered as he scooted a bit closer to Squall. "What's it like...you know...not being able to see?"  
  
"It's scary. Everything seems different. It forces you to see things in a new light," Squall suprised himself by answering. "No pun intended." Beside him Laguna had grown quiet.  
  
"I know the feeling. You're lucky though. I mean your blind, but you're surrounded by people you know," Laguna responded. "Kiros and Ward and I jumped off a cliff into the ocean to get away from estharian soldiers once. That's how I ended up in Winhill and met you mother." There was a brief pause. Squall almost wanted to end the conversation but he couldn't find the words. "I'd hit my head a few times, so by the time that I gained my consciousness back, I couldn't see. I couldn't really think too well either, but let's not get into that." Laguna chuckled lightly trying to lighten the mood. "I was scared. I had broken a leg, an arm, a few ribs, and cracked my skull. And when I woke up, all I could feel was either numbness from morphine, or the sharp pain that came when it was beginning to wear off. I was in a strange place with no way to see what was going on around me. If it weren't for a passer by doctor that had stopped in to check on me at Raine's request, I may still be blind today."  
  
"What'd he do?" Squall asked, suddenly very interested in the conversation.  
  
"According to Raine, he performed a minor surgery to drain the fluid and reduce the swelling around my brain. Once it was gone, my vision began to slowly come back." Squall was silent as he thought about what Laguna had said. "I wanted to talk to your doctor about your injuries, but I didn't want you to think I was becoming too protective or something."  
  
Squall remained silent. He did notice however that his face was beginning to feel hot once more. He rested his head on his hands as he realized that Dr. Kadowaki would've done a surgery like that had that been his problem. An almost unnoticeable tingle ran down his cheek. He didn't pay it any mind until he felt Laguna's hand wiping it away. 'What the hell!?' Squall thought suddenly. 'I'm not crying here. I can't be.' It was then that he felt Laguna's arm wrap around his shoulder. He wanted to shrug him off, but found he couldn't. He just closed his eyes as he sat in the middle of the floor with Laguna still holding onto him. Part of him wanted to pull away and withdraw, while his other half wanted to cry on his shoulder like a lost child. Why the hell was everything so confusing all of a sudden?  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Rinoa36 - Thanks. Hope you love this chapter as well. Your wait for this chapter is officially over. Too bad that means the wait for the next has already begun.  
  
DBH - Thank you. I originally wanted to blow things up a bit, but then I decided to make Laguna more persistant and concerned. Guess for once I wanted him to seem more responsible than the unsure moron that I would normally portray him as.  
  
Rinoica - The encouragement bit in the last one was a random idea that kinda came to me whenever I was trying to bring Mitchell back into it. You guys remember Mitchell right?  
  
Ariennye - I'm trying to further expand the insecurities of Squall and make him appear more dependant. Not that I don't like his character, because I do, but I just want to see how his character may change a little if he's forced to allow others to help.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
It's Christmas Eve's eve, so that means that the next two days will be full of family get togethers and food. I hope to have the next chapter up within a normal time frame, but no promises. Although I still encourage you guys to review as much as possible. If I get enough reviews, I may just steal away enough time to upload the next chapter. *wink* *hint hint* 


	7. Dancing on the Edge of a Squall Line

Disclaimer: I really really hate to break this to those of you who think I'm a creative genius for my development and creation of Final Fantasy VIII., but I didn't do it. I don't own any part of Final Fantasy VIII. Sorry.  
  
Author's note: I want to say thank you for all of the reviews. Even those to the beginning chapters. I opened my email and found around 15 reviews and I about died. Wow you people really suprised me. I wasn't expecting to get such a response. I really appreciate it. I've got the chapter after this one already in the works so don't worry, I won't make you wait long. How could I, you guys are a great audience.  
  
Dancing on the Edge of a Squall Line  
  
He lay motionless as the wind picked up. Her footsteps were a comfort to his ears. Each soft and delicately timed step was consoling in a way that he couldn't explain. He tried not to think about what had happened earlier in the day with the President of Esthar. He had fallen asleep, and the man had picked him up and put him on his bed before leaving. No one had ever done anything like that before. At least not to him.  
  
"Hey Squall," Her sweet voice pulled him from his thoughts. He sat up and faced her. "Do you think you'd like to go to the Quad with me?" His mind once again conjured up the image of her looking toward the ground and sliding her toes across the hard floor. Going to the Quad required walking through the hallways, he didn't like the idea of that. The last classes had already let out, and he knew that all the students would be out and about.  
  
'But she wants to go....Your probably bored out of your mind here aren't you Rin,' He thought as he felt around for his boots. "Sure," He answered as he found a boot and pulled it on. Squall was fumbling with his second boot when she got to him. He felt himself nearly falling off the bed as she pounced up on his lap and wrapped him in one of her exaggerated hugs.  
  
"Thanks," She whispered in a soft tone. His hands wanted to hold her there. There was something about her closeness that he never wanted to end. It was still so new to him and yet it felt like he'd always knew that it was out there, he was just waiting to find it. She pulled away from him nearly as quick as she'd came and then put his other boot on for him. "Let's go," She played as she pulled him into a standing position.  
  
Squall allowed himself to be pulled up and led to the door. The scratching of nails quickly persued them as they entered the hallway. "If he's under my feet and I step on him again it's his fault," Squall said as he kept a firm hold on Rinoa's hand.  
  
She laughed aloud, drawing the attention of the nearest students. He could hear their suprised turns and breaths.  
  
'Just stand up straight, don't trip,' He encouraged himself as the weight of their gazes grew heavier. Her grip on his arm grew tighter and then he felt her lean her head on his shoulder. He was suprised to find that he wasn't nowhere near as embarrassed as he thought he would be by the public display of affection. In a way, he was beginning to feel a bit proud. She was his, and every other guy in the vicinity could see that. 'Or, she's showing the other girls that I'm hers.' He grinned as he pulled his hand and arm from her grasp and put it around her waist. A few drew in breaths as they passed and he found it hard not to smile a bit in triumph.  
  
Getting to the Quad wasn't as difficult as he was afraid it would be. It didn't seem near as far as he thought it would be either. As they passed through the double doors, quite possibly the only doors that weren't electronic, they were hit with the thickening air of an upcoming storm. Balamb was a great place to be this time of the year. He loved the storms. Too bad he couldn't watch their lightening shows anymore.  
  
"Step down," Rinoa whispered as she guided him. He slowly followed her lead. When they'd reached the bottom, he took hold of the railing and leaned down on it. He felt her move away from him, but he could still hear her light steps. Leaning on his elbows, he tried to absorb everything about the moment. The wind, the air, the sound of her laughter. Laughter? What was she laughing about now? "Come on Squall, dance with me. I promise we're alone here," Her hands pulled at his arms. He felt himself being drawn to the middle of the Quad. He wasn't sure that he wanted to do this, but he couldn't resist it either. He allowed her to lead for a while for he wasn't sure where the drop off was where the Quad hadn't been fully repaired from their battle with Galbadian Garden. The wind began to pick up, blowing their hair wildly. She laughed aloud as she taught him how to dance as a blind man. "So, when do you think you'll be ready for the SeeD inauguration ball?" She asked as they both slowed to a stop.  
  
"All I have to do is show up right," Squall confirmed.  
  
"Yeah, no speeches or anything. Just make an appearance," She played with his hand as she placed her fingers through his and squeezed. "It really means a lot to the people here to see you out walking." Her voice grew quiet. "You really scared us. Really scared me," Her voice was hard to hear over the wind. She pulled him into a hug. It seemed like an inappropriate gesture to his military side. Here the commander and his girlfriend were hugging outside of the classroom windows, in the beginning of a thunderstorm, in a section of the garden that'd been marked off to students because of its previously sustained damage. It felt so damn good. He wrapped his arms tightly around her waist and pulled her as close as he could. Everything felt right about this moment; her skin, smell, touch, her arms around his neck. His handicap momentarily forgotten, he ran his hands up and down her back as he buried his nose into her hair. Her light perfume or body spray, or whatever she used, was becoming nearly intoxicating. A loud crack of thunder broke the wind's continuous song but neither of them jumped. He could feel her pull him closer as she rested her head on his chest.  
  
"Thanks Rin," He whispered into her hair.  
  
"For what?" She asked as he felt her look up at his face.  
  
"For not leaving me," The words sloppily rolled off of his tongue as he struggled to get them out. He heard her smile in response.  
  
"I'm not going anywhere," She reassured him. "I can promise you that." Her voice hesitated. "I mean if this is an insecurity of yours because your blind, ignore it." He could hear where she was wanting to say something else, but couldn't get it out. He wanted to tell her he understood, but he wanted to hear what she had to say. "Squall, I admit the first time I saw you at the Owl's base, I was captivated by your eyes....and let me tell you, they are still as beautiful as they have always been." A few heavy sprinkles began to fall as she continued. "Squall, there is so much more to you than I originally realized. I guess I'm just trying to say that I um....I lo," Her voice stopped suddenly as she turned to the sound of Angelo's barking. He was hanging on her every word and was left hanging when she stopped short.  
  
"Hey guys!" An all too familiar voice cried out. "One hell of a squall's about to blow in. You people are crazy! Come inside!" Squall just stood frozen where he was. An uncontrollable smile crossed his features. Quick and light footsteps bounded towards him.  
  
"Hey Zell," His voice came out barely audible but he was sure his friend heard him.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Optical Goddess - Your correct. Laguna did know. I just chose to make him pretend to be nieve of the subject. Some people don't believe things until they see it for themselves. I was kinda going for the feeling that as long as Laguna didn't admit or acknowledge that Squall was blind, it didn't really exist. Call it wishful thinking or avoiding the truth. Or if you want, call it Laguna with holding information so Squall wouldn't think he was being nosy. But yes, Laguna knew, just like Laguna knew how it felt to be blind. He just wanted Squall to talk to him.  
  
Dark Topaz - Your wait is over. By the way, I like your name. Want to trade?  
  
Undercovercloud - I like Laguna as well. When I first opened the booklet that came in the case and saw the picture with Squall and Laguna together I thought it'd be neat for them to be related. Anyway, I normally would portray him to not really be a moron, but not exactly in tune with the times. I was pleased with the way the last chapter went and I'm glad that you were too.  
  
Ruby Dragon - I haven't read a story with one of the characters being blind or deaf, but then again I don't think I've looked for one. I like it because it can turn the simplest thing into a chapter alone. example: walking to his dorm room  
  
Verdanii - Maybe. But not just yet. Where would the fun be in that? Besides, Kadowaki would've already performed that surgery if that were his problem.  
  
Selphie-ish Steph - I'm glad you were so moved by the chapter. *hands you a tissue*  
  
Earth's Rain - Here it is. A little behind schedule by my standards, but here nonetheless.  
  
Quisty878 - It's not easy to portray Squall. I constantly rewrite and revise his lines and actions constantly trying to figure out how to capture him true to character.  
  
DBH - Glad you were okay with Laguna. I don't know what I was more worried about; how you guys would react to Laguna's bit of togetherness or Squall's crying.  
  
Rinoa36 - Poor Laguna. That's just no way to be. What'd he ever do to you. (j/k) Thank you, thank you, thank you, and thank you for your review.  
  
rEnIkA - Squall's getting closer to acceptance, but maybe not quite yet. Besides, Laguna's not going to disappear after that last chapter. He'll be back. As far as the Squinoa goes, never fear, there will be plenty of it as soon as Squall get's acclimated to his blindness.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
I know it was short, especially compared to the previous chapter. I think there's close to a 2,000 word difference if you want to be technical. Anyway, I had two chapters written that could have taken over from where the last one left off. I think this one was a better fit because it was more of a transition chapter. That and it was a mild cliffhanger. I love writing those things.  
  
Anyway, what did you guys think of Squall's increasing confidence in walking around garden? Lastly, will Rinoa ever get to tell Squall how she feels without interruption and will he ever hear it? 


	8. Unsettling Revelations

Disclaimer: What horrible, ghastly individual came up with the concept of disclaimers. They are nothing but mere humiliating reminders that I am nothing but a poor fan that owns nothing but the pepsi can before me!  
  
Author's note: This is the eighth installment of this story and quite possibly the hardest thus far. I have already planned out the rest of the chapters and now I'm going to try to type them all. *breaks out the coffee* Typing them may take a while though.  
  
spoken words: "..." thoughts: '...' a lapse in time : ~*~*~*~*~  
  
Unsettling Revelations  
  
"Hey Zell," His voice came out barely audible but he was sure his friend heard him. By the time Zell had skidded to a stop a few inches in front of him, the rain had begun to pour down.  
  
"Squall!" Rinoa shrieked out as she grasped for his hand. He could feel her wet fingers slide over his as she tried to get a hold of his hand. "Let's get inside," She said as she pulled him towards the shelter of the main hall. He willingly followed her as they hurried across the slick floor of the quad. "Stop! The steps!" Rinoa cried out as a last minute warning. Stopping so quickly on such a slippery surface would be no easy task.  
  
"Argh!" Squall cried out as he stopped suddenly at her warning only to be knocked down by Zell. Rinoa squealed in suprise as she jumped out of the way. Laying on the cold wet steps of the quad, Squall could hear her jump back and then hurry forward to see if he was okay. "Get off me," Squall managed to say.  
  
"Hey! It's your fault!" Zell laughed as he jumped up and hopped up the stairs. Squall could hear the thud of his landing and wished that it was that easy for him to do. "Come on man! Only two more sets after this one," Zell laughed and pulled Squall up the remainder of the steps.  
  
"Are you okay?" Rinoa asked as she took Squall's other arm. He nodded to her and then turned to where Zell was sprinting off to.  
  
"We're gonna be saturated by the time you get inside," Zell's voice grew louder as his footsteps grew nearer again. Squall tried to get a grip on Rinoa's arm, but he was unable to before Zell hauled him up by his waist and slung him over his shoulder.  
  
"Zell!" Squall shouted in protest as Rinoa gasped a little in suprise. She began to giggle a bit and then he could hear her running on ahead.  
  
"Don't worry man, I won't drop ya," Zell reassured Squall as he bounded up the stairs.  
  
'This is so embarrassing. You'll pay for this one,' Squall thought quietly as Zell dropped him back on his feet and grabbed his arm to pull him quickly through the doors.  
  
They stood, dripping wet in the main hall for a few moments. Squall reached out his left arm until he brushed Zell's shirt. He grabbed a hold of the soaked fabric and pulled it closer to him.  
  
"Zell," He wanted to complain but his voice came out as a groan. Squall was cut off as two arms pulled him into a quick hug. When Zell let him go, Squall stood motionless as he tried to figure out what had just possessed his friend. He couldn't even pull together a whole thought. The feeling that everyone in Garden had stopped to stare at them suddenly surfaced as Squall remained unmoving.  
  
"Sorry to embarrass you, but I had to. I thought you were dead man," Zell's voice sounded a bit weaker than normal.  
  
"If it weren't for you I would be," Squall managed to say. He'd waited for days to talk to his friend and now he couldn't really think of what he'd wanted to say.  
  
"Hey, I'm going to go to Selphie's room; she and Quistis are supposed to be there. I mean that is if you guys want some time to talk," Rinoa offered as she pulled Squall's arm so that he faced her.  
  
"Sure," Squall answered.  
  
"Okay," She agreed. "I'll bring something from the cafeteria when I come back then." Squall nodded and then listened as she hurried down the hallway; Angelo at her heels. Once she was gone he turned to his friend's impatient jabs and punches.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Reaching his room was beginning to become an obstacle course. He'd tripped over two smaller classmen, one junior classman tying his shoe, and had nearly walked into a wall; courtesy of Zell. Lucky for him, Nida was watching and grabbed his shoulder at the last second. Squall made a mental note to promote his rank. Nevertheless, they made it to the dormitory halls without causing serious injuries to any other people.  
  
Squall handed his card key to Zell and waited as his friend unlocked and opened the door. The sound of heavy footsteps echoed down the hall. Squall wanted to ask who it was, but he heard the click of the automatic lock and Zell flick on the light-switch. He waited until he heard his friend enter before he stepped foreword, hands groping for the door-frame. The footsteps stopped abruptly behind him, causing Squall to pause. Before he could decide whether to turn to address the person or keep walking, he felt himself being hauled off the floor and knocked up against the opposite wall. He stumbled a bit as he tumbled forward. The footsteps approached him again so Squall stood up and unsteadily backed away. Two hard hands pushed his shoulders back, careening him into the floor. Leaning on his elbows, he listened for his attackers next move. It came in the sound of an menacing laugh. Squall sat baffled for only a mere second. He knew that laugh.  
  
"You sure fall gracefully Puberty Boy," Seifer laughed. "So, has Rinoa taught you anything interesting yet?" His tone dared Squall to retaliate. "I mean its all over garden that you two are bed mates." His voice held a sneer that Squall wanted to knock off his face. Commander or not, Squall wasn't about to let Seifer walk away free after a comment like that.  
  
"Seifer! What the hell do you think you're doing!" Zell's voice cut into the confrontation.  
  
"Look Chicken Wuss I didn't tell you to speak," Seifer growled. "This is between me and Commander Puberty here. If he can't defend his own girl you sure as hell don't need to." Squall pushed himself to his feet as he listened to the two quarrel.  
  
"Why don't you give the guy a break, he can't help it he's blind," Zell yelled back.  
  
"Enough!" Squall shouted, causing both of the other men to jump. He heard their shuffled steps as they turned to face him. He clenched his fist and swung it to where he estimated Seifer's head would be. He made contact with the side of Seifer's face; knocking the taller man down. Squall stood silently over Seifer as he waited for the former knight to rise.  
  
His hit was acknowledged by a laugh. "I can take a hint," Seifer said as he pushed himself off the floor. "And you can definitely throw a punch." Squall tensed, preparing himself for the possibility of a fight. "I had to provoke you somehow," Seifer's voice carried with it a hint of mockery. "I just wanted to see how well you'd adapted to life without sight."  
  
"Just fine," Squall's voice was even and frigid.  
  
"Ooh, cold as ice. Like always. Some things never change," Seifer mused. "Well maybe a little. I guess now I should call you Dark Ice right." His voice was beginning to annoy Squall. "Dark Ice for a cold knight. More fitting than Puberty Boy. Don't you agree Chicken Wuss?" Seifer's voice lowered a bit as he neared Squall. "I hope your a little warmer toward the princess, for your sake at least. She doesn't take to well to rejection. And I don't take to well to her crying."  
  
"What the hell?" Zell's protest at being called Chicken Wuss died before it even left his lips. Squall stood confused as he raised a brow.  
  
"What are you saying?" Squall asked Seifer as he stepped past him.  
  
"Don't worry about it. Just know you've been warned," Seifer's voice held a warning and protectiveness that irked Squall.  
  
"Hey Zell. What's Selphie's room number?" Squall asked once Seifer's footsteps had diminished.  
  
"3617," Zell answered. "You want me to call?"  
  
"Yeah," Squall said as he walked towards his friend's voice and followed him into his room. He brushed the familiar control panel with his gloved hand to shut the door.  
  
"Hey ya got a message. You want it now or later?" Zell asked.  
  
"Later, call Selphie. I want Rin to come on back. Preferably with an escort," Squall mumbled as he tried to piece together what Seifer had just implied.  
  
"Ya want to talk to her?" Zell asked as he punched the number in the phone. Squall shook his head as he stepped into the bathroom to wash Seifer's blood off his hand. He hadn't realized he'd been wearing a ring. Oh well, it wasn't his problem now. "Irvine's walking her back here. He said something about Selphie and Quistis coming over to eat." Squall groaned inwardly as he turned off the water. Once he was done he came back into the main room and pushed the message button on the phone. He lazily sat down next to Zell on the bed.  
  
The phone beeped as the annoying robotic sounding voice told him he had one message.  
  
"Hey Squall, this is uh, your um, I mean Laguna. I had to leave on short notice. Hope you don't mind I talked to that doctor lady, I don't think she liked me. Anyway, she said your blindness was the result of nerve trauma. Sorry if I got your hopes up, I was just tryi," The phone beeped again, cutting off the rest of the message.  
  
Both Squall and Zell sat silent as they concentrated on what they'd just heard. Beside Squall, Zell shifted uncomfortably. They both knew his chances of complete recovery now that they knew the source of his blindness.  
  
"Why didn't she just tell me," Squall said quietly.  
  
"I did what I could," Zell said angrily. "At least after the blast...but I could've prevented it!" His voice raised to a shout. Squall hid his face in his hands.  
  
"It's just as much my fault as yours," Squall stated.  
  
"Bullshit!" Zell shouted. "I just stood there and gaped!"  
  
"You were analyzing the situation Zell," Squall said. "You followed protocol."  
  
"Since when is go brain dead and act like a statue protocol?" Zell continued to shout. "I fucked up. We both paid for it; you more than me." Squall was silent. "I was the first one to you after the explosion. I was the one that pulled you from the concrete and pressed my hands over the gash on the side of your head! I was the one that was holding you when you slipped into shock. Hell I think we went into shock together. They had to pry me off of you. I couldn't move." Zell's voice was beginning to quiver a bit. Squall could only stare off in his direction. He found he was unable to form the words that he wanted to say. Then he found that he was unable to come up with anything to say anyway. An uneasy silence filled the room as they both sat quietly.  
  
"But you kept me alive," Squall whispered. "You've changed my life. And I'm not talking about the blindness. Everything has a new perspective now." Squall paused when he noticed that Zell was holding his breath. "Being blind has opened my eyes. I have to depend on people. It's showed me what its like to have real friends and its shown me how much I need Rin," His voice dropped lower. He heard Zell smile beside him as he put his shoulder on his shoulder.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Rinoa36 - Hey, I was wondering if any of you would comment on Laguna putting Squall in bed. That was actually a last minute add in just because.......I felt like it. lol I think I read the story you mentioned. I wasn't thrilled with it either....of course I'm a hard core Squinoa fan. Nothing against the author of that story, I just don't like anyone besides Squall with Rinoa.  
  
Earth's Rain - I'm glad that I've continued to please you with the progressing chapters.  
  
Selphie-ish Steph - I felt that it was time to give Squall a bit more confidence. The poor guy deserves it.  
  
baka_shinji_01 - I was afraid that I was making their relationship too cautious, considering they live and sleep together. But then I sat back and realized this is Squall I'm writing about.  
  
Verdanii - Thanks  
  
Dark Topaz - I updated....believe me it wasn't easy. I've been pretty sick.  
  
Goatmam - I'm glad you like it. I've tried hard to make it understandable and enjoyable.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Here you guys go. Chapter number 8. I just want to say that I really appreciate the reviews that I receive from all of you. I've been feeling really bad, but when I saw the seven reviews I had to respond. I didn't think it nice to keep you guys waiting. Hope you guys enjoy. I enjoy your reviews. 


	9. Anticipated Moments

Disclaimer:  
  
"SQUARESOFT"  
  
"OWN"  
  
"FFVIII"  
  
"NOT"  
  
"ME"  
  
"RAAAAAAGE!"  
  
*kicks squaresoft in the shins*  
  
Author's note- this is my longest chapter. It is also the biggest time jumper. To make it all better, it is also still in rough draft form. I just felt like I needed to get this out for you guys. And I also need to point out that my Disclaimer is not one of my own creation...I borrowed it from Ameli Stoncius.  
  
Anticipated Moments  
  
~*~2 weeks later~*~  
  
He inhaled deeply as he pondered what scent it was that she had sprayed on last night. Was it strawberries? Or maybe apples? Shit, he was a guy, he couldn't tell. He'd personally never smelled of the fruit that he ate so he hadn't a clue that they even had smells. He allowed a smile to cross his features as he ran a hand through her hair. She sighed lightly and snuggled deeper into her pillow. Squall found himself wanting to drift back to sleep although he was sure it was well past dawn. An idea popped into his head, causing him to roll out of bed and carefully make his way to the bathroom. He picked up the pants he'd worn the day before from the top of the hamper and pulled them on over his boxers. Keeping constant contact with the wall, he felt his way to the closet and grabbed a shirt. He knew venturing out without her knowledge was sure to perturb her at least a little, especially if she found out that he'd left alone. Nonetheless, he was determined that he would do at least this one thing on his own. After all, it was special, and so was she.  
  
After loosely lacing his boots he quietly stepped outside the door and leaned against the wall. The stillness and stuffiness of the air was already weighing his confidence down. The previous night had been very trying. Rinoa had fallen asleep lying in his arms, but he awoke in the middle of the night to find that she was crying. Her soft and quiet sobs had been enough to shake him from his light sleep. Squall hadn't a clue what to say, what could he have said? She assured him she wasn't crying because he was blind but because his hope of a full recovery was being slowly squashed. She'd cried to the point that she'd made herself sick and in turn scared him out of his mind. He tried to act strong, but not because he felt it; in reality the thought of never seeing again terrified him. She hadn't gone for it. Instead she'd just held him and talked to him about how he didn't have to worry about things because she'd be there. He wished his life were that simple. Maybe it could be. No, he was still Commander of this garden and had a responsibility to the students and SeeDs here.  
  
'To the cafeteria and back. I can do this,' Squall encouraged himself as he slowly stepped forward, dragging his right hand along the wall for orientation. 'She'll be waking up soon,' He thought as he walked a little faster. "57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 61, 63," Squall counted off and then stopped whenever his boots stepped off of the carpet and onto the harder floor. 'Approximately 63 steps from my room to the main hall.' Carefully, he stepped out into the seemingly deserted main hall. It was all deserted except for a light pair of footsteps that were rapidly approaching. Squall continued walking, his hand on the lip of the fountain railing. '11, 12, 13, 14,' He counted silently as he tried to pay the other person no mind.  
  
"Squall? I mean Commander Sir," A high pitched voice called out behind him. Squall stopped and turned toward the voice.  
  
"Wilhem," Squall acknowledged the jogging boy.  
  
"Good morning," The boy said as he jogged past. Squall listened as the boy rushed past.  
  
'I don't think I've ever had that much energy,' Squall mused as he continued counting steps. He walked alone down the quiet of the corridor until his fingers brushed the edge of the lip. He traced it with his fingers to be sure that it turned off and then he hesitantly followed it. '29 steps to the cafeteria entrance. This isn't so bad.'  
  
There were a few people in the cafeteria when he entered; and judging by where they were sitting he had to assume that they were treppies. He felt sorry for Quistis. She had her own following that obsessed over every little thing she did. Since the defeat of Ultimecia, they'd all gained a fan club or following of some sort. Squall frowned at the thought of the cameras and media that had followed him around. Nevertheless, Quistis still had it worse; and sometimes it seemed as if the treppies were fighting off her new fans. He slowly stepped across the hall and followed the opposing wall to the counter. He could hear one of the ladies behind it wiping something off.  
  
"You'll have to come back in 12 minutes honey we're not open yet," The lady said as she continued to clean.  
  
"You can open it now," Squall said flatly. He heard a pause in her movement and then what sounded like her turning around.  
  
"Oh, Squall, I mean Commander. Of course its open," She said quickly. "I'm sorry I didn't see you I wasn't paying attention."  
  
"I need pancakes with maple syrup and a biscuit and gravy to go," He ordered. "A glass of milk and orange juice, with tops." He could hear her pause at his last request and then dig around behind the counter before she handed him a tray.  
  
"Do you got all that okay?" She asked.  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine," He answered and then carefully started back the way he came. The room behind him grew deafly quiet as he left.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Finding his room hadn't been half as hard as he thought it would be. Especially when he realized that only his door would open with his card key. He quietly stepped inside and sat the tray down on the desk. As silently as he could he slipped his boots off and then climbed back in bed. Rinoa rolled over and snuggled up against his chest, making him not want to wake her. He knew he had to though. Or else his little trip would've been a waste of time. He ran his hand down the side of her face and let it rest there as his thumb rubbed her cheek. Her hand caught his, and then traced it back up to his shoulder so she could pull him closer.  
  
"G'd morning," She said through a yawn. "You're up early."  
  
"Morning," He answered as he felt her raise up and get out of bed. "Hope you're hungry."  
  
"Yeah," She answered. "Let me get a shower and then we can go get something from the cafeteria."  
  
He stood up behind her and turned her towards the desk. "How about we just skip the shower and eat now?"  
  
She was quiet for a few seconds. "Where did this come from?" She asked. "You didn't go by yourself," Her voice sounded unsure.  
  
"The cafeteria's not a hard place to find Rin," He said as he pulled her closer to him. He heard her smile before she stepped toward the food. His fingers allowed her to leave him, but took notice of the satiny feel of her nightgown as it slid out from under his skin. They proceeded to eat in silence and sat quietly, waiting for one another to speak.  
  
"Squall, we need to talk," Rinoa said as she picked up their plates.  
  
'Need to talk! That's not a good phrase,' Squall's mind began to panic. "W-What a-about?" He asked. 'Damn, I'm starting to sound like Laguna.'  
  
She sat down next to him and took his hands in a hesitant gesture. "I've um, been trying to talk to you for a while about something. But everytime I work up the courage to tell you, someone interrupts." He closed his eyes as he allowed her to rub her hands over his and then place them on his cheeks. "I know that whenever you first realized you were blind you were afraid that I was going to leave you because of it."  
  
He looked up quickly at her dead-on statement. He imagined his eyes were asking how.  
  
"I could tell, you clung to me like you were afraid I was going to abandon you. I guess I've just been trying to say that I'm not going anywhere, because..." She exhaled in the form of an embarrassed laugh. "I don't know if this seems premature to you or anything..."  
  
Squall sat rigidly awaiting her to finish what she'd been trying to say. He wasn't so completely stupid that he couldn't put a word in the blank she'd left open. At least he thought he knew what she'd wanted to say that evening on the Quad. He waited anxiously, praying that she'd say what he suspected and at the same time hoping that she wouldn't. He wanted her to have feelings for him. He wanted to be able to know that he was really important and meant something to another person. But then there was always the voice in the back of his mind that drove him crazy. Could he really take care of her like she deserved? Could he stand being abandoned again, hurt again?  
  
"Squall," He could hear her smile. "H-How do you feel about me?" Her words came out quickly and a bit slurred but he could understand them fine. She was trying to see how he felt about her. He was silent for a few moments while he tried to find his capability to speak.  
  
"Rin," He started. 'I can't do this!' His mind screamed.  
  
"Yes?" She asked.  
  
His tongue was beginning to feel heavier. "I think I love you," He mumbled quickly as he turned away and fought the urge to run away. His mind was screaming that he'd just overstepped his boundaries. Her hands turned his face back to hers. To his amazement, she began laughing. He leaned back trying to figure out what was going on. "I don't see what's so funny." He stated as she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in for a tight hug.  
  
"No no. I'm not laughing at you. I just never imagined that you'd voluntarily say that before I did," Her voice sounded strained. It reminded him painfully of how she was making him feel while she squeezed all the air out of his lungs. "Squall Leonhart, I love you too."  
  
Her words completely caught him off-guard. He had hoped she'd say that, and now that she did, he had a hard time believing it. "Would you say that again?" His mouth seemed to ask without his brain's consent.  
  
She giggled and then leaned back as if to get a better look at his suprised face. "I said I love you too." A smile came to his lips in response. Someone actually gave a damn about him. With his left hand he raised her chin and gave her a light kiss on the lips. He was still a bit shy around her, but with any luck that would change soon. "It's still early so I'll tell you what; go take a shower and then I want to share something with you. It's nothing big, but it's special." Squall was still too shocked to disincline anything she was saying so he obediently stood up after her. "I'll get you some clothes, you go on ahead."  
  
Squall nodded, not really wanting to part with her company, and stepped into the bathroom. 'She said she loved me,' He thought to himself as he shrugged off his clothes. 'Well I won't let her down,' He thought as he stepped into the hot shower. For the longest time he just stood under the running water trying to absorb what she'd said. It was a big step for him; more like a leap of faith in reality. He half expected to wake up only to find that it had only been a dream. A light tap on the shower door startled him from his thoughts.  
  
"Here are your clothes," Rinoa said. "Are you almost done yet?"  
  
It was then that he realized that he hadn't even began to shower. "....not quite...I haven't really started yet." He admitted.  
  
"Oh," was her only reply.  
  
"I can hurry," He said quickly. The thought that only a thin glass door separated them suddenly occurred to him. 'Can she see through it?' He looked over to her voice and mentally smacked himself for even trying to look.  
  
"No no!" She said quickly. "I mean you can just take your time, I don't mind." There was a brief silence and then a familiar sliding sound. Squall froze when he realized what was happening. "You don't mind do you?" Her voice came out innocently and sweet.  
  
Squall concentrated on his breathing for a moment before he answered. 'She's standing half a foot behind me!' His mind screamed. 'She's actually in the shower with me....but what if she doesn't like what she sees?' "I don't care," He stated flatly to try and mask his sudden insecurities.  
  
"All right then," Rinoa answered as she ran her fingers along his shoulders and down his arms. He knew his muscles were tensed up but there was nothing he could really do about it. In the small space usually only large enough to accommodate one, she turned him to face her. His breathing became a little rougher as his nervousness spiked. He almost quit breathing all together when she closed the distance between their bodies by pulling him into a hug.  
  
"If this is something you're just doing for me I don't want," His protest was cut off by Rinoa's mouth on his own. He loved the taste of her kiss, and found himself incapable of thought. She wrapped her arms around his neck in an attempt to keep him as close as possible. He, for the first time, allowed his hands to roam wherever the may.  
  
Her skin was smooth and enticingly slick under the steady spray of the shower. She ran her fingers through his hair and down his chest. He longed to do the same to her, but he didn't yet dare. It was now his turn to pull her into a kiss as his body lightly pressed her up against the shower wall. When she allowed one of her hands to brush across his backside he realized that although they were in the shower, neither one of them were going to come out any cleaner.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
It was early afternoon before Rinoa finally got Squall to follow her to Balamb Garden's auditorium. Squall was shocked to discover that they had a stage, much less a room of this size. Rinoa giggled at his suprise and then led him up a set of stairs and behind a curtain.  
  
"Sit here," She said softly. He reached out with her hand to feel where she beckoned him and then did as instructed. He heard her stand up and walk to stand behind him. He felt as if he were in a room made entirely of wood. Judging by her footsteps the floor was wood and he was sure his bench was. He felt her thin fingers on his hands and was fondly reminded of the morning's events. His fingers came across a smooth and cool surface that he wasn't familiar with.  
  
"What is this?" He asked and then noticed how his voice echoed in the large room.  
  
"A piano," She said softly. "This is middle C." She said as she directed one of his fingers.  
  
"I can't play," He said.  
  
"You will after today," She assured him. The thought of playing the piano didn't really thrill Squall too much but the thought of pleasing her with it was enough incentive to stay seated.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
He stood silently as she finished putting the finishing touches on his uniform. Squall himself had not seen his SeeD uniform since he became Commander but Rinoa assured him that it looked very professional and very nice. Squall however, was having a bit of difficulty getting used to the feel of a trench coat on his shoulders. The coat was optional, but Rinoa had insisted that he wear it.  
  
"Are you ready?" She asked as she stood up straighter beside him.  
  
"I guess so," He replied as he held out his arm for her. She gratefully took it as they stepped into the already crowded ballroom. She held his arm tighter as the stepped onto the ballroom floor.  
  
"This is the waltz we danced to the night you became a SeeD," She whispered. Squall listened to the music and smiled a bit whenever he realized she was right. "There's not too many people out there and the song's almost over," She begged, knowing he would understand her meaning. He groaned a bit at the thought of going out on the dance floor; but like their first dance, he had no choice. He was dragged onto the floor before he even realized where he was going. "Just this one dance and you can sit down the rest of the time."  
  
He nodded and raised her hand in the air and then proceeded to pull her closer. With his other hand lightly on her hip, they proceeded to execute the waltz like dance that Rinoa had made up for them. He slid lightly to the side and allowed her to spin out away from him, never releasing her hand from his. She closed the gap between them as the music ended. The dance was brief, but it did what Rinoa had assured him it would. It had stolen everyone's attention and show that he could still operate without his sight. Squall just didn't realize that they would all stop dancing and talking to watch him. They couldn't find their table fast enough for his liking, and he quickly sat down once they did.  
  
After a few moments, Selphie and Irvine joined them.  
  
"Hey guys," Irvine greeted.  
  
"Hiya!" Selphie smiled. "How are you and Rin doing?"  
  
"We're fine," Squall answered as he squeezed Rinoa's hand under the table and wondered how much she'd told Selphie about their relationship.  
  
"That's good to hear. I wish you could see him. This uniform almost makes him look professional," Selphie was obviously referring to Irvine. Squall nodded in agreement although he couldn't really picture Irvine in anything but his trademark leather or occasional denim.  
  
"Key word there being almost," Zell's voice suddenly entered the conversation as he sat down across from Squall.  
  
"NOT NICE," I stern and familiar voice warned Zell, and was followed up with a thump.  
  
"Geez!" Zell yelped. "I was playin' Fuu!"  
  
She obviously ignored the comment and walked over to Squall. He was waiting for Seifer or Raijin to pop out from nowhere but wasn't disappointed when they didn't.  
  
"LATE," She said as she referred to her two friends. "I need to speak to you." Squall was momentarily suprised by her request mainly because it was in the form of a full sentence. He nodded numbly and slowly stood up. He allowed her to lead him a few feet away from the table. "ZELL TOLD."  
  
Squall stood there trying to understand what she was talking about.  
  
She must've picked up on his confusion because she elaborated. "SEIFER CONFRONTATION." He nodded in understanding and annoyance. "Seifer's a good friend once he let's you in. LOYAL. A lot like I see you." Squall wasn't sure how to react to her words. "NEEDS YOU."  
  
Squall now stood completely baffled by what she had said.  
  
"RINOA." Fujin stated.  
  
"Why are you telling me this?" Squall finally asked.  
  
"SHOULD KNOW!" Fujin quietly exclaimed. "He still loves her."  
  
************************************************************************ Tai=Lisa=Squall+Rinoa -It's okay...take a deep breath. Do you think I'd let that happen? I actually like Seifer, he's actually one of my favorite characters. Nevertheless, I've wanted Squall to get at least one good swing in on him. He deserves that much.  
  
Cusp of a Butterfly -I'm glad I was able to move you so. Can't wait for your next review.  
  
Earth's Rain - You think you're confused.......think about poor Squall. You're not supposed to understand it yet.  
  
Dark Topaz - I hurried I hurried!  
  
Rinoa36 -Sure Zell got injured. It's hinted to in the 2nd or 3rd chapter. His injuries will be described better, scars included, in a later chapter that's already planned out. He suffered burns and lacerations to his arms, shoulder, and one of his legs. Squall if you didn't realize had some severe burns on one of his legs as well, Kadowaki was able to treat it while he was out.  
  
Selphie-ish Steph -Glad you liked the Zell scene. I wrote that scene like 6 times to try and get it right.  
  
Ameli Stoncius - If I don't submit the next chapter you'll stalk me.........you're a funny stalker.  
  
Verdanii- Nevertheless, I'm always happy to get your reviews  
  
Optical Goddess- Seifer's meaning is actually quite clear once you realize what he's not letting on to.  
  
DBH- Yep. Sorry Squall.  
  
Mithrandir505 - Thanks  
  
Goatmam -Here's the next chapter.....hope you like it.  
  
There's chapter nine. Gee whiz was it hard to type. I had to get this all in this chapter but I was afraid to make some things to detailed or take away from other things. So, did you guys like the ending? And don't worry about understanding Fujin........few people really can at first. (j/k) 


	10. Onslaught of the Antagonist

Disclaimer: After searching around my parent's house, all that I've found that actually belongs to me besides the clothes on my back is the stereo, playstation, and dog........wish I owned Final Fantasy VIII. Guess I can't have everything.  
  
Author's notes- this one was fun. I guess that's all I really have to say about this chapter. Oh yeah...there are some references to things going on in Irvine and Zell's life in this chapter. They'll be explained more in depth later, but not right now. And not in this fic for that matter. I've got a whole series of fics waiting to be uploaded. Each one deals with a different character, and each one corresponds to one another. Hope I can make it work. Anyway thoughts are '...' and spoken words "..." Lapse of time ~*~*~*~*~ Enjoy, I hope.  
  
Onslaught of the Antagonist  
  
The morning had went by insanely slow, and Rinoa leaving him alone with only Angelo didn't speed things up. Squall rested his head on the foot of his bed and numbly stroked the dog's head. Under his palm, Angelo squirmed a little closer so that he could rest his head on Squall's lap. Squall sighed and continued stroking the animal. It was this repetitive hand movement that was keeping him awake.  
  
Rinoa had gone out with Selphie, Quistis, and Chloe, the library girl, on a shopping trip in Deling. She hadn't wanted to go at first, but he had tried to be a sensitive boyfriend and told her he'd be fine. Sure he was fine. That feeling diminished as soon as the dormroom door closed. He sat silently as he listened to Angelo snore. He sighed again and wondered how much time it had been since she'd left. Squall had always considered himself a loner, at least before the Ultimecia incident. He'd thought that a few hours alone would do him good. He needed time to think.  
  
Unfortunately he was discovering how wrong his assumption was. The more time that seemed to pass by the more paranoid he was becoming. He should've known that this would happen. Being left to only the company of his thoughts brought back the disturbing insecurities that were mounting in his mind. It had been nearly three months since the evening at the ball when Fujin had pulled him aside and said those horrid four words. 'He still loves her,' They were driving him crazy. He worried about Seifer every minute Rin was away from him.  
  
"Could Seifer be the one Rin was going out with? No," Squall chided himself for even assuming she'd lie to him. "Irvine just called because she and Selphie had just left to get Quistis," Squall spoke quietly. He felt Angelo raise his head up and utter a little whine. "Yeah I know she wouldn't leave us."  
  
Squall adverted his thoughts to Irvine and Selphie instead. It was right after the SeeD inauguration ball that Irvine had told a few select people that he had a kid. He'd thought that Irvine was joking, everyone in their group had, except Selphie. Squall still wasn't sure if he believed it, he'd never heard the kid running around, much less held the thing. Without his sight to prove him otherwise, Squall still believed that Irvine was just pulling their legs. He had noticed Rinoa talking a lot here lately about their future. She hadn't really done that excessively until Irvine's announcement. Squall wasn't so sure about being a father or anything like that, but Rinoa's recent talk did assure him of one thing; she wasn't planning on leaving him.  
  
'That just proves how silly it is for me to fret over Seifer,' Squall thought. 'He's always competed with me and he's always tried to take what I want. But he won't get Rin. I'll die first.' He was shocked at his own train-of-thought and sat quietly; thinking only of what he'd just realized. A few knocks brought him from his contemplations, followed by the door sliding open. Two sets of footsteps entered; one sounding a bit more energetic than the other.  
  
"Hey man!" Zell announced his arrival as he hopped onto the bed. The mattress under Squall bounced a bit, sending a panicked Angelo to run for cover in the bathroom.  
  
'Poor dog,' Squall thought of how nervous the animal had become around him and his friends.  
  
"No time for courtesies," Irvine interrupted. "We've only got two hours."  
  
"Two hours....for what?" Squall asked; suddenly worried about their presence.  
  
"We're gonna go train!" Zell could barely control his excitement.  
  
"I thought you guys were just coming here? Wait a minute Zell. You're not even supposed to be in the training center. Didn't you manage to get one of you lacerations infected or something?" Squall asked.  
  
"Details," Zell countered. "Besides, its healing up fine."  
  
"Look, we came here to bust you out of this place. You have to be going insane just sitting in this room all the time," Irvine replied nonchalantly. The sound of shifting boxes and a few loud thumps made Squall uneasy.  
  
"I work with Cid some in his office," Squall tried to argue.  
  
"Psh," Irvine answered. "Doesn't count."  
  
"What are you doing?" He asked as he stood up and hurried over to where the noise was resonating from. He grabbed what he assumed to be Zell's shoulder, it was lower than his own, and pulled him backwards.  
  
"Hey?" He heard Zell cry out before he landed on the floor.  
  
"What are you looking for?" Squall asked as he pushed Irvine away from the closet. He heard the heavy heels of the cowboy's boots as he backed away quickly.  
  
"Where's your gunblade?" Irvine finally asked.  
  
"What?" Squall asked in disbelief. 'He can't honestly expect me to wield that, can he?' Squall found himself pointing to the bed before he had time to really comprehend what they were expecting him to do. A loud thud echoed as he heard Zell groan as he no doubt was attempting to crawl under the bed.  
  
"Got it!" Zell's voice sounded muffled from his position on the floor. "Damn this thing is heavy." Squall rolled his eyes to his friend's complaining.  
  
"Let me have it," Squall reached out his hand until the case's handle was placed in his palm. He easily hefted the case up onto the desk and flipped the latches open with his thumbs. Behind him he heard both Irvine and Zell take a few steps backwards. Squall grinned a bit to himself as he pulled the blade from it's case and swung it around. He pulled it up to his chest and for the first time in months, ran his fingertips along the side of the cold broad blade. The metal was slick and smooth to the touch. Part of him longed to be able to wield it in battle again; to use it as deftly as if it were but an extention of his own arm.  
  
"So.......you want to go or what?" Irvine asked.  
  
"We'll only fight grats if you want," Zell piped up. Squall ran his hand along the blade once again, admiring how it felt.  
  
"Why not?" He finally answered.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
The air of the training center was thick and heavy. Squall inhaled it deeply noting that it almost had a suffocating thickness about it. Whenever they left he'd have to get someone to readjust the environmental controls. It was also hot and humid. He hadn't even begun to train and he was starting to sweat. 'Good thing I chose not to wear the leather,' Squall thought to himself. In front of him he heard Zell's normally quick footsteps come to a sudden stop.  
  
"Looks like we have a grat," Irvine announced from behind him. Squall could hear his friends fall into position beside him. Squall swung Lionheart out in front of him and prepared himself for a fight even though he sincerely doubted that he'd get a swing at it. Zell cried out and launched himself forward. "Watch out for its arms!" Irvine yelled. Squall jumped backwards but was still clipped by the tip of the monster's arm. He was knocked face first on the ground. Squall grimaced as he expected to have landed on his gunblade. When he didn't, he sat up and groped for it on the ground.  
  
He felt something familiar bump into the side of his cheek. He froze while he tried to figure out what it was. It tapped his cheek again, and then ran under his chin to tilt his head up. Squall swatted at it, and realized it was his gunblade handle when his hand made contact with its grips. He wrapped his right hand around the handle and then knelt there as he tried to figure out who was holding the other end.  
  
"Booya!" Zell cried out from behind him.  
  
"Hey Squall, I didn't realize grats could fall so fast," Irvine's voice called out from behind him as well. Squall tilted his head back a bit further. A familiar smell, whether it was a cologne or shampoo, Squall wasn't sure. Neverthless he realized who it was and jumped up to his feet, pulling his gunblade with him. Seifer.  
  
"That was a too easy," Zell was still going on behind him.  
  
"Let's hope so," Seifer finally spoke. Behind him, Squall could hear Irvine and Zell turning around quickly. In front of him, Squall could hear Seifer snicker.  
  
"Seifer," Squall said trying to mask the relief and anxiety his presence brought. 'Good. If he's here he can't be bothering Rin.' Squall released a breath he didn't realize he was holding. 'He's probably looking for a fight.' Seifer didn't say anything at first, just paced around Squall.  
  
"Cid'll be pissed when he finds out what the Commander of his garden's been doing," Seifer stated. "He might get hurt." Seifer's voice mocked him.  
  
"Seifer," Squall's voice came out as a slight groan which earned him a laugh from the man in front of him.  
  
"What's wrong...Commander?" Seifer's voice was dripping with sarcasm. Squall didn't answer, he just turned and walked towards Irvine and Zell. "Haven't seen you in months. Not even at mission briefings." Seifer continued to taunt.  
  
"Just ignore him man," Zell said as Squall reached him.  
  
"Sure, ignore him," Seifer mocked. "Sure, just ignore me. If you can. But in all honesty, you've been avoiding me haven't you."  
  
Squall just sheathed Lionheart and crossed his arms.  
  
"What on earth have I done to deserve this cold treatment?" Seifer feigned innocence. Squall could pick up on his carefully placed footsteps. They were nowhere near as heavy as they were that day in the hall. It made Squall feel like he was being hunted. He instinctively pulled out his gunblade. "Two can play that game."  
  
"Hell no you don't!" Zell shouted out beside him. Squall was confused until he heard the distinctive sound of a blade sliding against its hoister. It was a sound so minute that only a gunblade specialist would pick up on it.  
  
"Stay out of this," Squall said sternly as he pulled Lionheart out in front of him.  
  
"Huh?" Zell and Irvine said in unison.  
  
Squall swung his gunblade around in a few arcs as he resumed his previous position. "I would challenge you, but I can't fight what I can't see."  
  
"Bullshit. That didn't stop you in the hall. I guess I'll just have to be sure to make noise," Seifer's voice carried a smirk. "You can take the offense if you want." Squall stood skeptically of the man in front of him. "I'm sure you'd like to take a few swings at me. Especially after what Fujin said." Squall's blood ran cold and he hoped that his face hadn't paled. "I see she did talk to you." Squall followed his footsteps as he walked towards his two comrades. "She's grown soft....ya know." Seifer mimicked the other male member of his disciplinary committee.  
  
Squall could hear where Zell wanted to say something in protest, but the words died in his mouth.  
  
"That's right chicken-wuss. Its all your fault she's gone soft," Seifer began picking at Zell. "Let's just say Raijin wasn't too far away from your table and so help me. She's like a sister, if you hurt her."  
  
Squall felt an arm wrap around his neck. "Mind telling me what's going on?" Irvine's voice sounded right next to his ear. Squall could only shrug in response. The weight of Irvine's arm was suddenly removed as Squall heard his friend cry out in protest. "Hey!"  
  
"Fujin wasn't lying," Seifer said as he pulled Squall closer to him. Squall found that breathing was becoming difficult. "But I'm not going to devise some contumaciously brilliant plan to steal her away from you. She's too happy right now for me to even attempt putting her under that kind of emotional stress." Seifer pulled Squall closer so that his mouth was near Squall's ear. "But so help me, you fuck up once, and she'll be gone."  
  
Squall pulled away from him quickly and pushed him backwards. "Don't you so much as speak to her!" He shouted.  
  
"Whatever," Seifer mocked him as he sheathed Hyporion and walked off. Squall was left standing in his wake, emotions running rampant throughout his body.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Don't you guys just love Seifer? I know I do. *Sigh* (j/k) Well there's chapter ten! This one was easy. So what'd you guys think about it? How about Seifer and Squall? Or....what about Zell and Fujin? And Irvine? I'm afraid not all these questions can be answered in this fic. Actually there are two others that will follow this one up. They won't build onto it, just around it. I'm still not sure about a sequel to this one though. The other stories will just correspond to this one and happen around the same time; they however will describe what's going on in the lives of the different characters. 


	11. Reality of Life

DISCLAIMER - I really really wish I owned Final Fantasy VIII. But I don't so don't sue me! I can barely pay for tuition and books at my college as it is!  
  
Author's notes- Spoken words "..." Thoughts '...' Change in time ~*~*~*~  
  
Reality of Life  
  
Squall lay sprawled across the bed he'd fallen onto after his return. He had almost forgotten what it was like to train. Sure he still did pushups and setups; exercises that didn't require an adversary, but actual training was nice. It'd been so long since he'd felt the pulsation of adrenaline pumping through his veins. It'd been far too long. His short training session with the guys had worn him out. Now he was sore. He was sure that he had bruises all over his body, he had to have. He never thought the day would come whenever a grat would become a formidable enemy. Squall learned real quick that when one had very little magic junctioned and can't see; grats can become nasty little monsters.  
  
'How long have I been asleep?' Squall wondered to himself. 'Rinoa'll be back soon.' He was caught off guard by two hands running down his shoulders and chest. He closed his eyes and smiled. Feeling her touch his skin was wonderful.  
  
"It's about time you woke up," Her voice was beautifully soft next to his ear. "It looks like you went training."  
  
"I did," Squall replied.  
  
"Squall!" She moaned as she let go of him and scooted away. "I thought we agreed that you wouldn't go in the training center."  
  
He felt a sudden guilt rise up in the pit of his stomach. She was right. "Rin," He pleaded. "If I'm not in here I'm in Cid's office, and its all driving me crazy."  
  
"Sitting in here with me is driving you crazy?" Rinoa said softly. Her tone suggested that she didn't really want to say it but did anyway.  
  
Squall just sighed and rested his head in his hands. He hadn't meant that, regardless of how it had came out.  
  
"I've spent, how long is it now? About four months here with you. I stayed by your side because I thought you needed me, wanted me here," Rinoa was beginning to sound hurt.  
  
"I didn't mean that!" Squall raised his voice louder than he'd meant to. Rinoa's breathing was beginning to get ragged. 'She's getting ready to cry,' That thought alone was hurting him.  
  
"I want you to be happy. But I also want you to be safe," Her voice was coming out faintly now. "What if you'd run into a T-Rexaur?"  
  
"Irvine and Zell were with me."  
  
She sighed loudly before she abruptly stood up. She was doing something he obviously couldn't see, and couldn't identify by sound. "I'm sorry I worry that you might get hurt, or even killed." Her footsteps were receding to the far end of the room. She was leaving. Inside, Squall was panicked. She couldn't just leave him. He needed her. Seifer's earlier warning began ringing through his head. 'Oh shit!' His mind screamed.  
  
"Rin please don't leave me," His voice came out as a weak cry. He heard her pause. "I need you here. I'm sorry." Squall was now standing, debating on if he should rush forward or just stand by the bed with his arms crossed like an insecure child. "I love you Rin. I can't loose you." Whatever she was holding hit the floor loudly as she ran over to him.  
  
"I love you too," She cried as she pulled him into a hug. "I just worry all the time now." He could feel her uneasy breaths on his skin. "Everything's just getting so...I don't know." She laughed lightly. "I'm not sure what I'm trying to say." She smiled a little at the statement. "When you train again, can you do me a favor?"  
  
"Anything," Squall answered.  
  
"Train in one of the rooms, not the training center."  
  
Squall thought about what she'd said. 'Oh well,' He thought to himself. "All right."  
  
"Thanks," Her voice was still unusually quiet.  
  
"Is something else wrong?" He asked as he ran his hands along the length of her arms.  
  
She exhaled loudly and sat down on the bed. Squall quickly followed suite and then wrapped his arms around her. She leaned against his chest and rested her head on his shoulder.  
  
It felt good, holding her like that. He knew something was wrong though; and that alone ruined the moment.  
  
"Will you stay with me?" Her voice was a barely audible whisper that sent goose bumps across his body.  
  
"Of course," He answered. "I love you." 'I don't understand....what's going on?'  
  
"On the way back from Deling, we stopped at Irvine's dorm. Selphie was showing us his baby." Squall listened, but was let down that she was avoiding what was bothering her. Right now he could care less about Irvine's kid. "He looks just like Irvine." Squall continued to hold her, hoping that if he were patient she'd eventually tell him. "I should have Selphie bring him over so you can hold him." Squall was a little startled by the statement. Why would he want to hold him? "What do you think about Irvine having a baby so young?"  
  
"I don't know....It's his business," Squall answered. "Its not my place to judge."  
  
"I just ask because um..." She paused. "I really need you to be here with me." Squall's throat tightened. He was afraid of what she might be getting at. "Squall?"  
  
"Hmm?" Was all he could get out. His palms were beginning to sweat as he fought to regulate his breathing.  
  
He felt her soft hand run up his right arm. He closed his eyes as he waited for her to speak. "I'm pregnant," Her voice was broken and almost inaudible. His body tensed up at the words even though he was expecting her to say them. "I'm going to have your baby," She said more in encouragement for him to say something.  
  
"Are you sure?" He managed to choke out.  
  
"Yeah," She whispered. "Please stay with me through this."  
  
'Why would she think I'd leave her?' Squall wondered. 'She's the first person that's always been there for me. Besides, I have a responsibility for this child too.' He pulled her a little closer to him and held onto her. He heard her smile as rested against him.  
  
"You're awful cold," She stated as she rubbed her hands over his body. "Let me get you a warm shirt." She got up and hurried across the room before he could protest. "Here," She dropped a long-sleeved shirt on his lap. He ran his fingers over the material. He didn't have a shirt like this. "I got it at one of the shops. It's a dark navy color."  
  
He quickly pulled the shirt over his head and then reached for her hand. When he had it he pulled her back onto the bed with him. She willingly joined him, and he wrapped his arms around her again. He gently kissed her forehead as he continued thinking about what she'd told him. 'How can I take care of her like this?' He wondered. 'She's going to have my baby and I can't take care of her.'  
  
"Don't get too stressed out. Everything will work itself out," Rinoa said reassuringly. He gave her a startled look. "I can sense your emotions. I'm a sorceress remember?" Her voice teased him a bit causing him to smile. "Don't worry. I have faith in you......my knight."  
  
He hadn't heard her say that in a long time. It brought another smile to his lips, even if it didn't really calm his nervous stomach.  
  
"We're going to have a baby," He said more to himself than anyone else. "Cid said that apartment projects were nearing completion. The first SeeD apartment would be ready within the next two weeks."  
  
"We're going to get an apartment?" She asked.  
  
"Yeah, all SeeD members with either a spouse or children will be granted one," He continued to hold her close as the phone rang. Squall just ignored it. Rinoa fidgeted a little but then ignored it as well. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head. She looked up quickly and returned the kiss. He loved the way she made him feel. His blindness made him feel vulnerable but she made him feel like he could take on the world.  
  
Behind them the answering machine picked up. Dr. Kadowaki's stern voice cut their kiss shorter than they really liked.  
  
"Squall, Rinoa, I know one of you have to be in there. Pick up the phone," Squall tried staring daggers at the receiver.  
  
"Don't get too bossy. I sign your paycheck. Or at least used to," He said aloud. Rinoa giggled beside him and picked up the receiver.  
  
"Hello?" She kept her free hand on Squall's shoulder as she talked. "No...." Her voice sounded embarrassed. "You weren't interrupting," She said to hint to Squall what they were talking about. He quickly took the phone from Rinoa and answered it himself.  
  
"Can I help you?" He said quickly. "I'll be down there when I get there." He quickly hung up the phone and stood up.  
  
"What's going on?" Rinoa asked.  
  
"I don't know," He shrugged.  
  
"Want me to go with you?" Rinoa asked.  
  
"You don't expect me to go in there by myself do you?" Squall tried to attempt a humorous tone. "Does she know about...."  
  
"No," Rinoa said quickly. "Let's just see what she wants and tell her when the time is right." Squall nodded, thankful that he wouldn't have to face Kadowaki any longer than necessary that night. He just didn't feel like it.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
The infirmary door hissed open as he followed Rinoa in. "President Loire," Rinoa greeted the man as she secretly announced to Squall who was waiting on him. "I don't believe I've met your friend."  
  
"Oh uh this is..." Laguna was cut off.  
  
"Oh ve have met me lady, but you juzt don't remember. I am Doctor Odine," Squall could hear the small man's footsteps growing nearer as he felt the blood drain from his face. Laguna was one thing, but this doctor was insane in Squall's book.  
  
Squall protectively pulled Rinoa behind him. There was no way this guy was touching her. Especially in her condition.  
  
An unsettling chuckle came from the small doctor. "My, your ztill az protective az I remember. Bezidez, I'm not here for her. I've come to zee you." Squall turned to where Laguna was sitting and mentally reached for the gunblade he knew wasn't on his hip.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
C.G *Forever is Now - I'm glad you're enjoying my story so much. Seifer is a bit OOC, but I'm compensating for the mental changes that he had to have gone through. After losing nearly everything, coming back to Garden to discover he lost Rinoa to Squall, becoming a SeeD, and now having to try and get his footing in a life he barely has control over. I plan to write a story about him going through that too.  
  
Cusp of a Butterfly - Seifer means that he's still in love with Rinoa, but because he's hurt her so much, (giving her to Adel didn't help), he's going to spare her the trauma of her relationship with Squall being broken up. He's hurt her enough in the past, so he won't be responsible for any heartbreak she feels ever again. Even if it hurts him. But should Squall's relationship with her fall apart, he won't hesitate to try and win her back. You kinda had to read really in depth for that I think.  
  
Earth's Rain - I hurried and here's the next chapter. I'm doing pretty good. Between both of my stories, the chapters are still coming out in a pretty consistent time frame.  
  
Son of Sephiroth - Not a Seifer fan huh. (j/k) He's not going to try and break them up I promise. *read what I wrote to Cusp of a Butterfly* Thanks for the review and I'd be glad to help you with any story ideas you might have.  
  
Ameli Stoncius - Thanks. There may still be a fight between them yet...but I'm not sure. (By fight I mean bruises and bloodshed) Anyway, I saw you posted and was tickled to death! I really like your story, even though I seem to be the only one reading it. Hmm... HEY EVERYONE! READ BROKEN PROMISES! Think that got someone's attention?  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Chapter 11 is now complete. Do you guys want to know how many more chapters there are? I could tell you now if you want to know. It might make you sad, I don't know how into it you are. According to how I've gotten it broken down, there'll be 7 more chapters. Hope you liked this one. Please review, it makes me update faster. If you feel really generous, check out my other story. It hasn't got much attention, but then again it was just uploaded yesterday. *shrugs* You guys are a great audience you know that. 


	12. Difference of Doctoral Experiences

DISCLAIMER- I could but only dream of owning Squall.......  
  
Author's notes: Hate to keep this brief, but my mother's rushing me to hurry so she can get on ebay. She's partly to blame for my lack of updating. Over the weekend I have almost no computer time because she's selling stuff on ebay. :( Anyway, I think you know the drill so I won't reiterate myself.  
  
Difference of Doctoral Experiences  
  
A silence filled the room that could discomfort the resting dead. It was nearly as debilitating as his blindness had initially been. He couldn't hear anyone else in the room. It felt like he was in a tiny box; one that was growing smaller and smaller. Lack of sight was something he was gradually becoming accustomed to. As a direct effect however, he had depended heavily on his sense of hearing. Right now all he could hear was his own breaths; heavy and uneven. Although Odine was there to see him; Rinoa had already caught his attention, and Squall didn't like the man. Something about the little doctor was disturbing and unnerving.  
  
A firm hand grabbed his wrist and pulled him over towards Dr. Kadowaki's desk. "Sit here Squall," Kadowaki placed his hand on her chair. Squall did as he was told, relieved that a desk now stood between Odine and himself. "Rinoa dear, I guess you'll just have to sit on the desk. I don't think I have any other stools."  
  
"You can have mine," Laguna offered.  
  
"That's okay," Rinoa answered as she sat down on Squall's lap. "Thanks anyway." There was a shocked silence as Squall imagined the two other men in the room taking Rinoa's action as a suprise. Shuffling in front of him told him that Kadowaki could really care less what had just happened. The woman took everything in a steady stride. Rinoa scooted back a little in discomfort and Squall put an arm around her waist so that his finger tips just barely brushed her thigh. It was an extremely bold move for him to do that in public. Laguna however had put him in an uncomfortable situation, so now it was Squall's turn to do the same in return. He fought the urge to interrogate the Estharian president, and was relieved when Dr. Kadowaki began talking.  
  
"Mr. Loire brought Dr. Odine here to address a rather important situation. I regret to have called so late, but the procedure needs to be addressed as soon as possible before it too becomes useless," Dr. Kadowaki began speaking. "Squall, I'm sure that you're fully aware that I have evaluated your situation, and considered all possible procedures that may have been applicable to your recovery. I had sincerely hoped that your vision would return at least partially, but things don't always work out like I'd like them to." There was a pause. Across the room, Squall could hear the shifting of the other men, and Kadowaki approaching them. "Dr. Odine has reviewed the scans taken of your head and the notes taken based on your injuries. He came to my office this morning and confronted me with a procedure that he believes will allow you to regain at least some of your vision." She sighed as she continued. "The reason I had you come down here to talk to him in my presence, is because I'm weary of his proposed technique."  
  
"Vait! Vait!" Odine interjected. "At leazt let me explain ze procedure!"  
  
"Dr. Odine!" Dr. Kadowaki snapped. "Correct me if I'm mistaken, but we've already had a conversation in which you agreed to remain absolutely silent until I was finished." Squall could hear the smaller man sit down quickly.  
  
"My apologiez," Odine sounded as if she'd wounded his pride. She probably had. Squall smiled a little bit but hid it behind Rinoa.  
  
"Let's continue then," Dr. Kadowaki picked back up where she left off as if nothing had happened. "Dr. Odine is basically proposing to surgically mend the damage sustained in your accident. While it is common knowledge that the medical facilities in Balamb and Galbadia territories are advanced in certain fields, neither of them have the sophisticated capabilities to execute the type of operation Dr. Odine is calling for. It has been pointed out in many exhibitions that Esthar is far more advanced medically and technologically. The procedure Dr. Odine is wanting to use has about a forty-five percent success rate at restoring normal vision. My worry is that as long as your eyes and nerves are not tampered with by surgical means, there is still a slim chance that you may regain some of your vision. If you should decide to hear Dr. Odine out, admit to his procedure and it fail, there will be no other chance for you to recover your vision. Once those sensitive tissues are damaged or tampered with, its rare for them to be mended. Much less be restored to their pre-injured condition. I just don't want to get your hopes up. Odine does make it sound really good. I just felt that it was my duty to see to it that you completely understood the circumstances of what is being proposed."  
  
Once she was finished, Squall leaned back in his chair, careful not to throw Rinoa off balance. "Dr. Odine?"  
  
"Yez my boy," he quickly jumped to his feet and scurried to the desk. Squall readied himself.  
  
'If he so much as steps past it....' Squall thought.  
  
"I apologize for being zo hard to contact. I vaz on a trip to Deling whenever Prezident Loire finally reached me. Once I heard of your injury I immediately contacted Dr. Kadovaki." He paused for only a brief instant before continuing. "The procedure I propoze iz a very difficult one. Not for me az a doctor, juzt medically zpeaking. I vill have to expoze the optic nerve in order to execute the operation. That alone iz quite a feat and iz Dr. Kadovaki's main concern. In all honezty. I believe that you zhould conzider my propozal. Az long az you have been blind, the chanzez of your zight recovering are very minute. Having zaid that, I zhould only varn you zat ze longer you vait, ze lez chance you have at zis operation vorking."  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
Two hours had passed since they'd left the infirmary, and still he'd yet to announce his decision. He needed to be able to see; if not for himself, then for her. She lightly slid her hand across his clavicle. (collar bone) Judging by her even breaths, she had either drifted off into a light sleep, or was just very relaxed. He hoped for the latter.  
  
Squall thought about the scene in the infirmary. Odine was a crazy fool, but he was also highly intelligent. 'Maybe too intelligent for his own good,' Squall thought about Odine's part in the whole Ultimecia mess.  
  
"You asleep?" He asked Rinoa who was laying with her head on his chest. She didn't answer at first, and he grew silent. He didn't want to wake her if she was sleeping. Her sleep had been troubled enough as of lately anyway.  
  
She sighed and then slid her hand along the base of his neck. He closed his eyes as he focused on the feel of her soft fingers. "Is it better to take a chance and risk loosing what your chasing after, or to play it safe and hope that what you seek will come to you?" He didn't answer. How could he? A similar thought had been racing through his mind ever since he found out there was a shred of hope for recovery.  
  
They continued to lie quietly in the comfort of each others' arms for a few minutes more. Neither of them wanted to break the silence. He knew she wanted him to see at least as much as he wanted to, and then sometimes he wondered if she wanted him to be able to see more. She didn't pity him, or feel sorry for him, but every time he stumbled, tripped, or messed up because of his blindness, he could almost feel her getting distraught. It was really something new to him. He wondered if what he was feeling was similar to what she felt whenever she read his emotions. Maybe it was a sorceress-knight thing; he didn't know.  
  
"I need to be able to see again," He finally spoke. Although he couldn't see it on her face, he knew that he had her full attention and she expected him to continue. "I may never see if I just lay around here and wait for it...." He sighed aloud. "I think I should do it. I may never even get any part of my sight back if I don't."  
  
"Our relationship is built on taking chances," Rinoa spoke softly. "You took me to Esthar, and jumped out in space to save me. You kept me from being sealed away once we reached the ground again.....and I don't see why you shouldn't do this either. If you don't and you grow old without ever gaining at least some of your sight back, you'll drive yourself mad by dwelling on the what if questions." He hugged her tighter before reaching up above his head and grabbing the phone.  
  
"Can you dial the number?" He asked nervously.  
  
"Mm hm," She answered as she pushed the buttons in for him. He didn't realize it until he had the phone up against his ear, but his hand was shaking. After two rings there was an answer.  
  
"This is Squall....When's the soonest I can go to surgery?"  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Sorry this one took so long and was so short. I had originally planned on Dr. Kadowaki and Dr. Odine fighting it out or Squall and Laguna, but it just didn't read right. Will update sooner, and with a more interesting chapter I promise. In the meantime, please review. They make my day and really do encourage me to write more and sooner. 


	13. A Matter of Time

Disclaimer: Yada yada yada.......some fine print.........ah there it is : Final Fantasy VIII is the property of Squaresoft. Damn it!  
  
Author's notes: My hand hurts. It took so long to get this one out because I'm clumsy and fell and hurt my writing hand. Therefore I couldn't write drafts of this and had to type it mostly with one hand. Sorry it took so long. For those of you who don't know the drill yet....  
  
thoughts '...'  
  
spoken words "..."  
  
changes in character point of view ______ (This one might be new to this story)  
  
A Matter of Time  
  
Squall leaned so that his elbows rested on his knees as he waited for the car to arrive at its destination. Beside him on the seat, Rinoa watched him with interest. She then cast a quick glance to her right where Laguna had been sitting in a similar position for nearly the entire ride. She allowed herself to slump down in the seat as she inwardly wished that one of them would say something. She'd never ridden in a car that was so silent. Her breath and heart beat seemed to be getting louder the longer the silence persisted. She glanced down at Laguna, who was finally sitting up and looking out the window, and then at Squall who was still leaned over and running his fingers through his hair. They were both nervous; she could tell.  
  
When Squall had talked to Dr. Odine about scheduling a date for the surgery, he'd had no idea that the Doctor'd already had him scheduled in for the day after next. He knew that this surgery was his last real chance at recovery, and still he felt almost as if he were neglecting his command by leaving Garden. Rinoa'd assured him that sometimes he had to put himself first, but he still felt as if there were more that he should've done before he left.  
  
After Ultimecia's defeat the popularity of SeeD, more specifically Balamb Garden, had soared. He had just started working with Headmaster Cid to try and sort through the hundreds of transfers and new students that had suddenly taken an interest in Balamb Garden. Together they'd set a limit capacity for the number of candidates they'd accept and had to in turn, hire contractors from Fisherman's Horizon to design more dorm rooms and apartments in the vacant sections of Garden.  
  
To add to the increasing complications of being in command of Garden, the contractors and the engineers from Fisherman's Horizon were threatening to quit if certain regulations and practices in Garden weren't nullified. Although Cid hadn't come out and said it, Squall knew what was going on. The mayor of Fisherman's Horizon had sent a notice to the contractors and engineers in an attempt to try and indirectly force Balamb Garden to give up its title as a mercenary training facility. He had been waiting for something like that to happen since the first engineers repaired Balamb Garden the first time and then remained onboard to see to its mechanical upkeep.  
  
Squall didn't need all this on his mind. Enough was going on as it was in his personal life. It was interesting, how a year ago he hadn't had a real personal life. No real friends, or a girlfriend for that matter. He leaned back in his seat and sat up. Now it seemed like everything was happening at once. His friends all had something big going on in their lives. Quistis had just received her license back, Selphie and Irvine had that baby one of them was always toting around, and Zell had, for the most part recovered, and according to Irvine, had his hands full arguing with Seifer because of Fujin. As for himself, not only had he been blinded and learned what it was like to be solely dependent on someone, he'd also fallen in love with Rin and was going to be a father. He didn't even have a father growing up. How was he supposed to act? Surely not like Laguna. That man still hadn't said a word since the Ragnarok left Balamb garden.  
  
Squall settled for a light sigh as he tried to clear his thoughts. The latch on the door clicked as he heard it open.  
  
"We're here," A voice that undoubtedly belonged to Kiros greeted. Squall reached his left hand up to feel where the roof of the car was, and ran it along the smooth cloth like textured ceiling until he found the edge. He slowly stepped out, with Rinoa's hand on the small of his back for support. Once he was outside, he stepped back a bit to give Rinoa room. The icy wind stung as it blew across his face and bare hands. It whipped his hair around, and for the first time, he realized that it was at least a few inches longer than it had been before he was blinded. He felt Rinoa slid her arm through his as she snuggled closer to him for warmth. A firm hand took hold of his shoulder as Kiros spoke, "I sincerely hope that this surgery helps you. Ward sends his wishes as well." Squall nodded in acceptance, not really sure what to do. No one had really said that to him, at least no one except a few close friends, and even at that he just thought that it was a requisite for them to say that.  
  
"Come on," Laguna finally spoke. "There's a cold front moving in and its bringing a lot of snow with it." Squall allowed Rinoa to lead him up to the lift, and then into the Presidential Palace.  
  
The warmth of the building was a very welcome sensation. Squall found himself helping Rinoa take off her coat and then giving it to the butler. He slowly removed his own as his senses took in his new environment. It was very warm but not stuffy, the air smelled of something; perhaps it was a candle. If Ellone were staying here, she was probably the one lighting them all.  
  
"Squall?" Ellone's soft voice broke the silence, causing him to turn around. He could hear her footsteps she hurried over to his side. "How are you?" She asked as she wrapped him in a loving hug.  
  
"Fine," He answered, still a little uncomfortable with her method of greeting him now.  
  
"That's good," She rubbed the side of his arm as she directed her attention to Rinoa. "How are you doing?"  
  
"I'm doing good," Rinoa answered. Ellone let go of his arm and then proceeded to greet Laguna in a similar fashion. Squall wondered if she greeted everyone in that manner.  
  
"Okay, um....I guess now I'll give you a tour of the place, or rather I'll just tell you where everything is," Laguna started speaking.  
  
"Could you keep it simple," Squall asked. He'd been in the place once before and he knew all about the intricate workings of the narrow hallways in-between the older rooms in the east wing.  
  
"Don't worry," Laguna's voice suggested a shrug. "I have both of you rooms in the west wing. They're right next to each other."  
  
'Hope you don't expect us to use them both,' Squall thought to himself.  
  
"Come this way," Laguna took Squall's left wrist. Squall hesitantly followed him. "Right now we're in the main hall. Its basically just a big open ball room. If you go through the left doorway; which it the only one without a door, you'd enter the business part of the palace where I do most of my work. If you go up the stairs straight ahead, you'll find the part of the west wing where you'll be staying."  
  
'Stairs?' Squall wondered. 'What happened to those little lifts?'  
  
As if reading his mind Laguna continued. "There's the lift that you probably noticed the first time you were here off to the right, but I myself like the stairs a bit more. Those lifts are just nauseating. Step up." It was obvious Laguna wasn't giving Squall a choice in climbing the stairs. Rinoa caught up to them and proceeded to walk next to Squall. When the finally reached the top of the stairs, Laguna pulled Squall to the left and down a hall. "This hall here is pretty much straight. We're about 25 feet from the staircase, and there are only four doors to your left. The first two are the bedrooms you two may stay in. The third is a bathroom, and the fourth a small study. About 170 feet straight ahead the hallway opens up into a sitting room or lounge. Its got a television, radio, a few couches, billiards, and a few random games. There's also a piano, but I don't know if you care to know that."  
  
Squall nodded in understanding and then looked over to the right. "What's on that side of the hallway?"  
  
"On this side of the staircase there are two smaller hallway entrances. The first one leads you to a whole other section of bedrooms and study rooms. The second leads you straight to the kitchen and dining area." Laguna answered. "I know its getting late, but if you're hungry, I can get something fixed for you."  
  
Squall turned to Rinoa. He wasn't hungry, but he wasn't sure if she was.  
  
"No thank you," She answered as she then nudged Squall.  
  
"I'm not hungry," He answered quietly.  
  
"Oh, all right then. I'll get your stuff up here in a little bit," Laguna sounded a bit crestfallen but quickly recovered. "I've shown you your rooms, and mine is the first door on the right just off the first hallway if you need anything. Ellone's is at the end of that hall. Whichever you prefer."  
  
"Thank you," Rinoa said. After a few awkwardly quiet moments, Squall heard Laguna walk off and trot down the stairs. Taking Rinoa's hand, he tried to find the bedroom closest to the staircase. "Here," She giggled as she placed his hand on the doorknob. He twisted it and the door slowly fell open. "Oh my gosh," She said in disbelief.  
  
"What?" Squall asked.  
  
"This room is gorgeous," She admitted.  
  
"What does it look like?" Squall felt like indulging her excitement.  
  
"There's a bed against the wall on the left with really long comforters hanging down to the floor. It looks as if there are candle holders or lanterns on the wall. They look really elaborate. To the right there is a private bathroom, an antiqued armoire. Wow, I don't think I've ever seen one quite like this. Its so tall and detailed." She led him towards it. "Feel of this," She placed his fingers on one of the doors. "That looks hand carved."  
  
Squall furrowed his brows together. "It doesn't seem like it would fit in with the technology of Esthar."  
  
"No, but it fits in with this room," She added. "The window covers much of the wall, and there's a long seat built into the base of it like a lounging couch." She released his hand and walked away. He followed her muffled footsteps mentally until they grew suddenly sharper and she stopped. "I thought this room was carpeted, but its just a really big rug.....Squall, the floor looks like marble."  
  
"Are you serious?" Squall asked, suddenly very curious about the room.  
  
"Black marble at that, with swirls," Rinoa answered. "Hey Hon, I'll be right back," She ran past him and opened a door that she hadn't mentioned before. He slowly made his way to the bed and sat down on it. Rinoa hurried back and then sat down next to him. "The other bedroom's gorgeous too, but this one is still better."  
  
"Does that mean you're taking this room?" He asked.  
  
She was quiet for a moment while she slid her arms across his chest and back simultaneously and wrapped him in an exaggerated hug. "I was kinda hoping that we could stay together. I know it might look bad to your father..."  
  
"I'm not worried about him," Squall cut her off as he covered her mouth with his. She fell back onto the bed, bringing him down ontop of her. They explored the insides of one another's mouths with their tongues. Rinoa finally broke it so she could take a deep breath. He felt her run her soft fingers along the contours of his face, and then brush his hair back behind his ears. They laid there in the company of one another for a few minutes before either of them spoke.  
  
"Its getting late," Rinoa finally said. "Your surgery's at eleven tomorrow isn't it?"  
  
"Yeah," He answered as he rolled off of her and swung his feet off the other side of the bed. He quickly unlaced his boots and kicked them off. He struggled for a moment to pull himself free of his snug shirt before slid off his pants and climbed into bed. He listened as she removed her shoes.  
  
"Toss me your t-shirt," She said. He rolled over and felt along the floor until he found it. Grasping it in his left hand, he tossed it in the direction of her voice. "Hey!" She called out. "That was my head!"  
  
After she'd undressed and put on his t-shirt he felt the bed give a little as she slid under the blankets. Squall closed the distance between them and wrapped an arm around her waist. Slowly she turned over so that she was facing him. He raised up so that she could rest her head on his chest. Once she was situated, curled up against him, she began to talk lightly.  
  
"So, how are you doing?" She asked.  
  
"I'm just fine," He answered barely above a whisper.  
  
"What's on your mind? I can tell you're thinking about something. What is it?"  
  
He closed his eyes as she ran her hand along his bare skin. "The baby," He answered honestly. "And you." There was a long pause. "I was really unsure at first, but then I overheard Irvine talking about his kid and I began to look forward to it. But then I um....I thought about..."  
  
She was quiet for a moment, and then realized what he was talking about. She fought the urge to cry as she pulled herself closer to him. "I'm not going anywhere," Her voice threatened to give out on her. "I promise you that we'll have this baby, and we'll raise it together." She buried her nose in the crook of his neck. "Everything will be all right. I just know it." He didn't sat anything, but he did hold her a little closer. He listened to her breathing for a few minutes until he'd determined that she'd fallen asleep.  
  
________________________________________________________________________  
  
Laguna made it to the top of the stairs with both of their bags and Angelo on his heels. He started to gently knock on the first door but paused when it fell the rest of the way open. He glanced past the elaborate furnishings to see Squall asleep with his back to the door. Hesitantly, Laguna stepped forward and carried Squall's duffel bag in. He froze whenever he saw Rinoa curled up under Squall's protective arm. He continued to gaze at them in partial disbelief. It was a suprise mainly because he hadn't expected Squall to be so bold, but then again, he didn't really know Squall that well.  
  
Laguna carefully backed away and sat down on a chest against the wall. He felt like he was invading their privacy, but he couldn't take his eyes off Squall. It was hard for him to believe that he was his son. He hadn't known Raine was pregnant when he'd left all those years ago. Would he have stayed in Winhill had he known? His thoughts drifted to Ellone when he finally found her; all alone and crying. No, he couldn't have left her, although he wished things could've been different between him and Squall. He suddenly remembered something and reached into his pocket. He pulled out a small silver camera and fumbled with it for a minute. Squall would most likely kill him if he knew. 'No he wouldn't,' Laguna thought. 'He'd be mad but that would be it.'  
  
With one of the lights still on, there would be sufficient lighting. Laguna quietly stepped around the side of the bed, careful not to hit an uncovered spot of marble, and snapped a few shots. He then lowered the camera to his pocket and noticed how they were laying. She was cuddled up as close to him as possible facing the far window, while on his left arm she laid her head, and his right hand was placed on her stomach. Laguna began to grow increasingly uncomfortable. He'd been in there too long as it was. Stepping out of the room, he shut off the corner lamp and pulled the door to.  
  
________________________________________________________________________  
  
The next morning came quicker than Squall would've liked. He'd awaken to find himself in bed alone. Confused, he sat up and listened until he heard a faint heaving sound coming from the bathroom. He carefully stepped out of bed and felt his way along the wall until he found the door. He knocked lightly and was answered by another heaving sound.  
  
"Rinoa?" He asked as he pushed the door open.  
  
"I'm fine Squall," Her voice sounded strained as she began to heave again. He knelt down by where he heard her and pulled back her hair for her. Once she had stopped, she leant back and then shakily stood up. "I'm so tired," She groaned. "I didn't sleep well." He stood up after her and slowly followed her footsteps to the bed. She laid down again, and he just sat on the edge. "This baby is definitely a boy. There is no way a girl could be this troublesome," She tried to joke. He grinned a bit at the comment and then left her to sleep. He didn't have much time as it was before he'd have to leave, but he didn't want to disturb her. Quietly, he pulled on the clothes he was wearing the night before, minus the shirt, and stumbled over their bags.  
  
He froze, they weren't there last night. Someone had been in their room while they were sleeping. He shook the thought away. There was nothing that could be done about that now. His fingers scoured his bag, which he recognized by the leather feel of it, and finally found the zipper. He pulled it open quickly and pulled on the first shirt he found inside. Although he didn't want to leave Rinoa, he had to do something to occupy his mind. The thought of Odine cutting on his head in a few hours was enough to make him sick to his stomach. He hurried across the bedroom, and in the process, managed to step on Angelo again. The dog yelped out loudly and frantically scrambled out from under him as he fell. Squall cried out in pain as he realized just how hard the floor was.  
  
'Damn marble,' He thought to himself. Squall listened silently to see if Rinoa had been woken, but she didn't make a sound besides her normally timed breaths. He pushed himself off the floor, and was thankful to make it out to the hallway. Pulling the door closed behind him, he slowly began walking to the lounge at the end of the hall. He had to do something, listen to the t.v. or radio or anything. Squall arrived there sooner than he'd expected and realized that whenever he walked into a heavy solid piece of furniture that made a vibrating sound upon impact. He paused, he knew that sound.  
  
He turned his head as if to glance around out of normal nervous habit, and then ran his hands along the side of the piece. His right hand found what he was looking for when it fell off the edge and landed on a very familiar ivory texture. Carefully, he stepped behind it and sat down on the bench pressing up against the back of his legs. Could he really play? His fingers ran lightly across the keys as he gently pressed one to see how loud it was. Satisfied that it wouldn't wake anyone up, he put his hands where Rinoa had placed them months ago and attempted to play the song that she was trying to teach him. He knew it was something her mother had written but was never released. It sounded to him like a lullaby although he wasn't sure.  
  
His fingers slipped and hit the wrong key a few times, but for the most part, the song was coming to him. It sounded a little off, and it was then that he remembered the foot pedals. For a few minutes he was able to amuse himself with his amateur playing. Footsteps began to grow louder as someone, obviously not Rinoa approached. Squall quickly stood and stepped away from the piano.  
  
"It's just me," Laguna said quietly. Squall still didn't relax. "Its ten o'clock." Squall just nodded as the knot in his stomach grew tighter. "You should probably eat something before you go in." Squall just shook his head and crossed his arms as he turned away. The common silence that always made itself known when they were together had come once again. "You should eat something."  
  
"I'm not hungry," Squall answered hoping to usher Laguna away.  
  
"Too nervous to eat huh," Laguna said casually. "Odine is a complete idiot when it comes to understanding people. It took him years before he really grasped that there was more to people than just flesh. I guess Ellone taught him most of that. Anyway, I wouldn't have involved him if I thought he were a complete lunatic. He's a genius, even if he does act as if he should be evaluated sometimes. He knows what he's doing. You know, he's the reason why only 1.7 of every 421,106 people on Esthar soil are blind. There are few cases he can't repair, or at least improve."  
  
Squall stood silently for a minute. Was he trying to calm him down? It was working, to an extent. "1.7 people? Is the .7 still living?" He finally asked.  
  
"Yeah well, the 1.7 represents one normal person and then compensates for all the poor wounded soldiers that lost three limbs in the first sorceress war, bringing their body masses down to seventy percent of what they were born with......as the president I can't discriminate." Laguna said the first corny story that popped into his head. Squall just shook his head at the pathetic excuse at a joke.  
  
With the atmosphere in the room a little more relaxed, Squall finally spoke without having been prompted to. "I should probably get down there." The words were hard to say as he envisioned Odine with sharp objects around his brain and eyes.  
  
"Yeah," Laguna answered. "You sure you're not hungry?" Squall nodded and then walked down the hall, dragging a hand along it to count doors. Laguna watched him with interest as he entered the farthest bedroom.  
  
Inside, Squall gently kissed Rinoa's cheek. He was actually quite relieved she was still asleep. He didn't want to have to sense her worry. That would just add to his own. Instead he gently rubbed her cheek with his thumb and stepped back out into the hall. He waited for Laguna to lead the way before he started slowly down the stairs and was handed his coat from the butler. As he slid the long trench coat over his shoulders he realized just how nervous he was. Laguna opened the door, and grabbed Squall's arm to lead him out.  
  
"There's a lot of ice and snow out here. Just walk where I lead you and we should theoretically make it to the lab unscathed," Laguna instructed Squall. Squall didn't reply, but kept close to the older man and stepped cautiously onto the slick and slushy ground below. The arctic wind began to pick up as he carefully sat down in the back seat of a car and scooted over to allow Laguna room to sit as well. The door shut with a muffled thud, and he leaned over to hold his head in his hands. In just a few hours it would all be over with. Just a few more hours.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
The end is drawing near. Not too near, but pretty near. I hope you guys liked this chapter. It took forever to type and was a lot of work. Please review and let me know what you guys thought. I would really appreciate it. Thanks. 


	14. Darkness at First Light

Disclaimer: Do I really have to put one at the beginning of every chapter? They're such a waste of time. If I owned Final Fantasy VIII, I wouldn't have to write these stories. I would just have the programming people make them into a movie so I could watch them.....  
  
Author's note - *screams* I am done with this chapter! Thank you Lord!......Okay now that I got that out of my system. This one was really hard to write. Plus I had to do research. If I messed something up, you guys just let me know and I'll try and correct it. But geez this was hard to write. And please look over the bad accent I gave Dr. Odine. After working at it for hours I was ready to pull out my hair. I can never remember how to do it right. Enjoy......I hope.  
  
Darkness at First Light  
  
Squalls's eyes fluttered open as he regained consciousness. Where was he? He groaned as he sat up and wrapped his arms around himself. Why was he was so cold? His hands ran across bare skin. He paused in confusion; why was he not wearing his shirt? Shaking profusely, he rubbed his hands along his arms in an attempt to warm himself up. He stopped suddenly when his hand bumped into something on his arm. It sent a sharp stinging sensation down his arm causing him to grint his teeth in pain. With his right hand, he covered the source of the sensation. A warm liquid slid down the side of his arm and in-between his fingers. Was he bleeding? Squall pulled his hand away and tried to examine it. The little beep behind him began to pick up pace and then everything came back to him. He was supposed to go into surgery.  
  
"Iz all right," A discomforting voice spoke up. "You've managed zu pull your I.V. out. Zat iz all." Squall gripped the sides of his bed in an attempt to calm himself. He felt two hands grasp his arm and a dry gauze wipe away the fluid on his arm. "Turn down ze lightz," Odine ordered someone Squall couldn't see. Wait, he couldn't see. Squall sighed in defeat and clenched his eyes together. It hadn't worked. "Zere were a few complicationz once I started but for ze most part, I zink it vorked."  
  
Squall slowly swung his legs to one side of the bed and leaned over. 'Yeah, great success. I really owe you,' Squall thought bitterly. "I can't see."  
  
Dr. Odine began to chuckle. "Of courze not yet," He said in his annoyingly odd voice. Squall could feel the little Doctor's hands brush against the side of his face as he removed the cover that Squall hadn't felt over his eyes. "Mozt of your face may ztill be numb." He warned. Squall blinked his eyes, and for the first time in nearly four months, he could see; sort of. Immediately in front of him he could see the silhouette of Dr. Odine. "Vait a few minutz for zem zu adjuzt." Squall remained where he sat, but looked around in a desperate attempt to recognize a shape or object or anything. Part of him was excited that he'd be able to see again, but his cautious side was afraid to get too worked up incase his eyes didn't adjust. It seemed almost too good to be true. He'd spent nearly four months being blind, and now in just a few minutes his vision was supposed to clear up. "Increaze ze lighting five perzent."  
  
Squall turned towards his voice and tried to make out Odine's form. An aide, dressed in a teal blue scrub walked up to him. Wait, he could see that man. He focused all of his attention on the aide just a few feet by his side. Even with the dim lighting, Squall could make out the teal of his uniform and the color of the man's blonde hair. Squall inadvertently reached up to rub one of his eyes. The aide grabbed his hands quickly.  
  
"I have to ask you to not rub your eyes. For a few days they will be very sensitive," The aide said as he pulled out a small light and held open the eye-lids of one of Squall's eyes.  
  
"All right," Squall answered as the man examined his left eye with the light. He turned his head to allow the aide to look into his other eye. Squall could see the man give him a brief smile through his still unfocused eyes.  
  
"I need to run a few more quick tests on your eyes," The aide informed Squall as he turned on a light over Squall's bed. Squall clenched his eyes shut at the sudden brightness. "Sorry," The aide apologized. "You're eyes should be okay as long as you don't look directly at the light." The man in front of him produced what looked like a few posterboard charts from under the bed. "I just need you to look at the picture on here and tell me what you see." Squall shot the man a skeptical look and then stared at the picture. To him, it looked like a series of dots. The more he stared at it, however, the more it began to clear up.  
  
"Is there supposed to be a number there?" Squall finally spoke. "Because I see thirty-five, and at the same time, I think I see fifty- seven." Squall turned to the aide who was marking something on his pad.  
  
"What color is this pen?" The aide asked, after marking down something on a clipboard.  
  
"Blue," Squall answered a bit annoyed. The aide looked down at the pen for a moment and then over to Dr. Odine. Squall turned to look at the doctor who was digging through a cabinet. He half expected to wake up. It was too hard to believe that he was actually seeing his surroundings.  
  
"Okay," The aide said more to himself than to Squall. "This is what Dr. Odine assured me would happen." Squall squinted his eyes as he struggled to make out the details of the man's face. What did he mean by he was assured this would happen? "Do you understand the difference between the cones and rods in your eyes?" Squall stared blankly at the man. What was he talking about?  
  
"The cones control what colors you see don't they?" A welcome and familiar voice interjected. Squall looked over his shoulder to see Laguna standing on the otherside of his bed. He just stared at the older man who reached out and handed him the shirt he held in his hand.  
  
"That's correct. Each cone is responsible for detecting one of three colors; red, green, and blue. The cones are also located directly behind the retina in your eye, thus providing you with your sharper vision in bright lights," The nurse began what sounded like was going to be a long speech.  
  
"Vat iz enough Henry," Dr. Odine interrupted. "I can handle ze rezt for now." The aide nodded and handed the doctor the clipboard before leaving. The little doctor fiddled with lowering the stool Henry had just vacated thus giving Squall enough time to pull on his shirt. Next to him, Laguna leaned down on his elbows, causing the thin mattress to give a bit. Squall cast him what he wanted to be a quick glance but held it longer. Although most of his vision was still blurred, he could make out the older man's black hair, dog tags, and even his deep green eyes.  
  
'I don't remember his eyes being that dark before,' Squall thought to himself. He dismissed the thought but then realized how pale Laguna's shirt was. It almost looked like a faint red, or dare Squall even begin to think pale maroon. No, surely it wasn't maroon. 'Has to be the lighting,' Squall thought to himself.  
  
"Ah, I ze you like hiz zhirt," Odine interrupted his thoughts. Squall turned to face the doctor. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Laguna looking down at his shirt and then over to Dr. Odine. "Vat about my zhirt. Vat color iz it?"  
  
'Is this a trick question?' Squall thought to himself. "Its red...I think." Just a few feet in front of him, Squall could see Odine grin. 'What?'  
  
"Here," Dr. Odine handed him a piece of paper. "Cover up ze right eye and look at me." Squall did as he was told. "Zen do ze left eye." Squall again complied and dropped the piece of paper on the bed.  
  
He looked up at Dr. Odine. "What's wrong with my left eye?" Squall asked suddenly worried. "How come I can barely see red with my left eye?" Beside him, Laguna put a hand on his back. Squall cast a glance over his shoulder, not really seeing a defined picture, but still letting Laguna know he wasn't entirely comfortable.  
  
"Itz okay," Dr. Odine insisted. "Zere waz a complicazion. Az my aide told you, conez control ze color you zee. Zome of ze conez in your left eye vere damaged. And, it juzt zo happened zat ze damaged conez vere red receptorz. It zhouldn't be too detrimental to your vizion. More like a ah....annoyance. Zat iz all. My aide vill finish up talking vith you and zen you can go." Odine stood up, smiled and left the room before Squall could even think of anything to say.  
  
Left alone in the cool room, both men shivered at the same time. "It worked," Laguna broke the silence.  
  
"Yeah," Squall answered uneasily as he tried not to stare at Laguna's shirt.  
  
"Does it look that bad?" He asked. Squall shrugged his shoulders. The silence was becoming unnerving.  
  
"Thanks," Squall said quietly.  
  
"Anytime," Laguna was feeling a little nervous and it showed.  
  
"No, you don't understand. I really, really appreciate this," Squall responded as he looked away from the older man and tried to no avail to make out the design on the flooring tile.  
  
"I was just trying to take care of my son," Squall stiffened at his words. "I was never there before, but I wish I'd been."  
  
Squall stood unmoving as he controlled his breathing and tried to figure out how to respond to what he'd just heard. 'He called me his son. I am, I guess technically, but that was a little bold. Wasn't it?' Squall continued to be silent as he dwelled on what he'd heard.  
  
"Sorry that took so long," The aide smiled apologetically as he came back in. "I just have a few things to say and then you can be on your way." He fumbled with a black case before he managed to pull a pair of glasses free. Squall stared in mild disbelief at what the man held in his hand. "Let me explain why you need these.... Because so many of the cones in your left eye were damaged, that eye is going to be more sensitive to light. You see, cones are color receptors that function best when there's more light. Because some of them were damaged, your left eye is forced to rely on your rods for vision as well."  
  
"My what?" Squall asked as he crossed his arms across his chest.  
  
"Rods are similar to cones," The aide began. "The main differences are that the images they project are colorless and they see better in dim light. Although it isn't mandatory that you wear the glasses, it is highly suggested. Your right eye is just fine, but the left one may eventually become more nearsighted if its forced to rely too heavily on the rods in bright lights. Cones project a sharper image than rods, but because your left eye is partially dependent on your rods to see in normal lighting, the image will be a bit out of focus in bright lights. In dim lights it won't seem as bad because that's the best lighting for rod's to work in." The aide handed the glasses to Squall. "Dr. Odine put the finishing touches on them this morning. The lenses are tinted to help keep out bright lights. The left lens is also adjusted so that you can see clearly out of that eye. You can probably get by just fine in dim areas without them. But not wearing them in places like...well here in Esthar with all the snow that's fallen, would be a bad idea. You could probably further irritate the eye, worsen its condition, and not to mention give yourself a horrible migraine."  
  
Squall nodded in understanding as he fingered the glasses. They had thin frames, and they were definitely not bulky or flashy. 'I can live with glasses, if I get to see Rin,' His mind paused. 'Why isn't she here?'  
  
"If you don't like them, wait about two months and we'll have a look at your eyes and can probably give you contacts," The aide offered. "Also, one more thing before I let you go. You need to put drops in your eyes in the morning and at night for two weeks." Squall took the bottle from the man and slid it into his pocket. "If you need anything or have any questions, there's a number on the bottle. Other than that, I guess you're good to go." The aide patted Squall's shoulder and then left.  
  
Squall walked slowly across the room to the mirror over the sink and looked at his reflection. It'd been so long since he'd seen himself. 'This is what Rinoa looked at everyday and didn't complain?' He thought as he noticed the stubble on his chin and around his mouth. Slowly and hesitantly, he slid the glasses on. He looked at himself skeptically. It just seemed weird. Reaching back behind his head, he pulled free the ponytail that someone had used to keep his hair out of the way. His bangs fell well over the frame of the glasses and the back of his hair fell a little below his shoulders. It was like he were staring at a stranger.  
  
"Squall?" Ellone's voice brought him from his thoughts. "Uncle Laguna came and told me! Congratulations," She smiled.  
  
'What?' Squall was beginning to get perplexed. Why was she congratulating him? He hadn't done anything. She couldn't know about the baby. Could she?  
  
"I'm so glad the surgery worked for you," She cast him her best smile. He smiled weakly in response and let her lead him out into the hallway. He noticed for the first time that she walked rather quickly. It bothered him. He wasn't used to seeing everything he passed, much less watch it whirl by as he was practically dragged down the hall. He was relieved when they reached the lobby for two reasons; one he could stop and ease his dizziness, and two, Rinoa was there. "She hasn't been feeling good since yesterday morning. We offered to call a doctor but she dismissed the idea." Ellone seemed a bit perturbed.  
  
"Oh, uh she just doesn't like taking medications unless she absolutely has too," Squall lied. He felt guilty about it, but at that moment, he didn't think it was time yet to tell Ellone anything.  
  
"Oh. You see I didn't know that," She looked a bit embarrassed as she tugged at the hem of her shirt. We'll be out in the car whenever you two are ready to leave." Squall watched her go, and then turned to Rinoa almost shyly.  
  
"Hey," Rinoa smiled as she slowly walked towards him. She was just as beautiful as he'd remembered her. He took note of how her ebony hair now fell well past her shoulders and how she didn't seem quite as petite as she'd once been. Her small frame didn't yet show the obvious signs of her pregnancy, but he could tell.  
  
"Hey," He said as well whenever they finally reached one another. "How are you feeling?" He asked when he realized she looked a bit pale even with her makeup on.  
  
"Oh I'm fine," She smiled up at him as she ran her hand along his cheek. He closed his eyes and focused on the way if felt. "How are you feeling?"  
  
"A little dizzy, but that's all," He answered as he pulled her into a hug. "I can see Rin." He stated plainly.  
  
"I know," Her voice sounded unsteady. "I'm so glad it worked."  
  
"Me too," He answered as he let her examine his glasses. He watched as she instpected their craftsmanship and then tried them on herself. He tilted his head to the side as he studied her.  
  
"These make you look smart," She stated as she put them back on for him.  
  
He smiled down at her. In the background, he could hear Dr. Odine talking with someone. "Come on, let's go," He said as he pulled on his trenchcoat that had been laying across one of the chairs.  
  
"Ah, you don't want to talk to him?" She said as she followed him to the door.  
  
"No I don't," Squall answered as he pushed the door open for her. He placed a hand at the base of her back as if urging her to hurry, and to assure himself that this had really happened.  
  
"Thank you," She said as she stepped outside into the bitter cold, pulling her coat tighter around her shoulders. He followed his lady out of the building, and for the first time in months, was able to see what lay ahead of them.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Son of Sephiroth - I didn't stop giving shout outs! I just ran outta time with my mom rushing me to hurry up. I promise!  
  
Aratcorien - I couldn't help it. I was describing the room and decided on marble floors cause I thought it'd be neat. Then, I realized that poor Angelo needed one more scare. Laguna's definitely starting to pick up that Squall is opening up to select people, and in this chapter he tries to push the envelope a bit to see how Squall will react. He's also starting to get suspicious about Squall and Rinoa, especially considering she gets sick in the morning. She might fool Ellone, but for once, Laguna's not a moron. Oh, don't worry, Squall's gonna find out about the pictures.  
  
Ameli Stoncius - Thank you thank you for such a nice review. And just to perplex you even more, I'll say thank you again. Thanks for reading my stories, and getting me so involved with yours. Literally. (j/k)  
  
DBH - Glad you liked it. I plan to gradually build their relationship because I've always thought that they should become some what closer.  
  
Mithrandir 505 - I'm so pleased that you liked it. Hope this one's okay.  
  
Spawn of Hell - You have a point. I've come across too many stories where Squall is so messed up. Even one where he had a happy family, he just didn't care about anything. It was like he was brain dead or something. I wrote this to try and give the guy a decent life, compared to some of the fics I've read.  
  
Black-Rose 72 - Your wait is over......hope you liked this chapter.  
  
Blackened - I really liked your review. I wanted to change the way Squall thought and reacted to things, but I knew I had to do it gradually, and the best way to do that was to force him to change....make him have to be dependent for a while.  
  
Dark Topaz - Here you go. Thanks for the review. Are you sure I can't steal your name? I'll buy it from you.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Oh wow. That could almost pass as and ending couldn't it. What do you guys think? *laughs evilly* Sorry it took so long. I wanted to get it right, and I tried real hard to. I even researched everything from color blindness to the approximate length of Squall's hair in the game! Anyway, please review. Let me know I didn't screw things up with this chapter. I mean it would've more dramatic if he hadn't recovered. Right? 


	15. Angel Starfire

DISCLAIMER: Final Fantasy VIII is owned by Squaresoft .......these are really getting old.......  
  
Author's notes: 3 more chapters to go! I know you guys are either excited or upset.  
  
thoughts '...'  
  
spoken words "..."  
  
~*~*~*~ lapses in time  
  
Angel-starfire  
  
Squall inhaled deeply as he rolled over and was greeted with a familiar warmth. Nestled under the warm comforter, he had no intention of getting out of bed, nor removing himself from her side. He slowly opened his eyes and was thankful the previous day hadn't been just a dream. Under the bronze and cream colored layers of blankets and the russet colored comforter, he found Rinoa's sleeping form. She was so beautiful, even through obstructed eyes she was a wonderful sight to wake up to. What worried him was that she was pale. He knew she'd been sick, due to their child, but now he was seeing its effects first hand. She groaned lightly and rolled towards his body. He watched as her hand came to rest on his abdomen as she slowly opened her eyes. Squall slowly ran his finger along her jawbone, brushing her long raven hair behind her ear. She looked up at him and smiled weekly. He returned the smile as he let his right hand drift down to her shoulder and then to her waist. He'd never really touched her before the accident; at least not intimately. Then afterwards, they'd grown so close and comfortable with one another in such a short amount of time. She slid her hand up his chest and rested it against the back of his head, making sure to run her fingers through his hair in the process. Neither of them said a word. They just laid there in the presence of one another.  
  
Finally, and rather abruptly, Rinoa jumped up out of bed and rushed to the bathroom. Squall sat up quickly, momentarily unsure as to what was going on. He turned his head to watch her before it dawned on him. On the nightstand next to the bed was a clock. What was the time? He couldn't hardly tell. The numbers were thin and red. 'Damn digital clocks,' he thought to himself as he rolled over and slid off the other side of the bed. He found his bag on the floor and dug through it until he found his watch. He carried it with him as he slowly walked to the vanity where Rinoa'd put his medication. 'It's already 12:31!' Squall thought to himself. He knew they'd gotten back to the palace late, but he had no idea how late. Through a closed door he could hear Rinoa heaving. He fingered the small bottle he'd been given the day before, before he slowly made his way to the bathroom. He looked around, astonished by his surroundings. This room was different than the other guest rooms he'd seen before. It was larger than Zell's entire house! The walls were covered in elaborate paintings and hangings, while the floor was adorned with multiple rugs that added a little bit of warmth to the cold black marble. When he reached the door, he knocked hesitantly. When she didn't answer, he slowly twisted the brass doorknob and stepped in. He found her kneeled on the floor next to the toilet, her hair draped messily over her shoulder.  
  
"I'm okay. I think its over for now," She tried to assure him. He didn't believe it, mainly because she was even paler than before.  
  
"You need to be in bed. Get off this cold floor," He answered. She shook her head as if she were afraid to part with the toilet's presence. He shot her a disapproving glance before he picked her up and carried her back to bed. While he walked across the floor, she just lay there. She didn't complain about being able to walk herself or anything. She should've been more responsive than she was. He laid her down and covered her up in the blankets. He quickly found a lined trash can near the desk on the far wall and sat it next to her bed. She managed a weak smile and took his hand.  
  
"I'm going to be fine," She assured him. "This is normal. Go get yourself something to eat and go find something to do."  
  
"You need to eat more than I do," Squall stated as he continued to look after her.  
  
"I will a little later. I promise," She was beginning to look tired. "I didn't sleep well, " She yawned. "You go find something to occupy yourself with while I get some sleep okay?"  
  
He finally nodded and walked to the other side of the bed to get his clothes. Snatching the first pair of black pants and a navy shirt that he could find, he quickly pulled them on and then looked for the rest of his clothes. Once he had his boots laced he made his way back to the vanity and faced his slightly personal predicamate. 'Just a drop in each eye,' He concentrated as he squeezed the small bottle. A few drops came out, but they all rolled down beside his nose or across his cheek. 'Guess I have to build up my hand-eye coordination again.' Rather than waste the bottles contents and have to return to Odine's lab to get more, Squall settled for a very awkward solution. He brushed his hair rather quickly, then dropped the bottle in his pocket with one hand while picking up the glasses from their casing with the other. He then made sure she was asleep before he walked rather hastily across the floor. Angelo, who was resting by the fireplace near the door jumped up and tried to take off running but Squall bent down and caught him. The dog froze as if trying to decide which way would be a safer escape route. Squall rubbed the dog gently behind its ears as he stood up and exited the room.  
  
The hallways were more lavishly decorated than he remembered. He opted for walking before he asked anyone, namely his father, for help. He passed the staircase and went straight to the east wing. The narrower halls in this part of the building were still generously decorated as the west wing's were, they were just more complex. A few of the halls curved around what he remembered was a pool room. It was somewhere near the back of the palace. He just had to find the back. Squall continued walking as he welcomed the dim light that greeted his eyes. It had been so long since he'd been able to open his eyes and actually see and now he wanted to look at everything. He stepped into the hallway to his right and was pleased to see that it curved out of his line of sight. Slowly he began walking, not entirely sure if he could rely dependantly on his eyes for the judgment of distances. He stopped when he heard a noise. As quietly as one could when walking with hard soled boots on marble flooring, Squall approached an open door. Inside, he saw Laguna and Ward looking over something in a book. Both of the older men looked up at him expectantly and waited for him to enter. Squall slowly stepped foreword and looked around at the comfortable little lounge they were occupying.  
  
"Afternoon Squall," Laguna greeted him. Squall nodded in acknowledgment and slid his hands in his pockets. "Is something wrong?" Laguna asked.  
  
Squall looked at the floor. 'Why'd he have to ask?' "Can one of you put these drops in for me?" Squall mentally chided himself. He felt like a poor child that had to have someone hold his hand. To Squall's surprise, Ward stood up faster than his father, so Squall handed him the bottle. He watched as the much more massively built man read over the bottle's label and then tilted Squall's head back. It was embarrassing, but not as bad as it could have been if Laguna'd tried it. Ward was finished quite quickly. "Thanks," Squall said. Ward merely grinned and walked back to the couch. "I need to pick up some things," Squall stated bluntly as he tried to hint to Laguna that he wanted to leave the palace without a fuss.  
  
"Oh," Laguna caught on but was looking a bit unsure. Ward pushed him foreword with one of his large hands. Laguna cast him an annoyed glance and then looked at Squall. "Mind if I come too? I mean...I uh...need to get some stuff anyways."  
  
"Is it really wise for the president to just walk the streets unarmed and unguarded," Squall tried to dissuade him.  
  
Laguna shook it off. "Nah. I was elected president anonymously, but have made it clear that I'll step down whenever they feel I'm no longer worthy. Basically I'm an equal here. I'm just president to the rest of the world." Squall inwardly sighed in defeat and then motioned for the other man to follow him.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The last time Squall had been in Esthar he was trying to clear out the monsters in the aftermath of the lunar cry. It had been a mess......but it had been a hell of a lot warmer. He pulled his coat around himself as he followed the older man to what looked like a large airport. Once inside, Squall realized that it was six stories of department stores and small retailers. Laguna walked over to a photography booth, and Squall followed, from a distance. Squall noticed with unease that the lady behind the counter had winked at him. He pulled at his glasses as he continued walking, trying his best to ignore what he'd just witnessed.  
  
"What'd you get?" Squall asked.  
  
"Some film I'd had developed," Laguna answered quickly as he looked around.  
  
"So are you an aspiring photographer as well as a journalist now?" Squall said dryly as he looked down the long line of businesses.  
  
"Huh? Oh...ah no," Laguna said as he tucked the pictures away. Squall cast him a quick glance before stepping slowly into a jewelry shop. Behind him, Laguna looked around at the array of chains and pendants on display. "So, what are you looking for?" Laguna asked the question although he secretly had an idea as to what the answer was.  
  
Squall didn't immediately answer, but instead knelt down by a case of expensive looking engagement rings. The parental part that Laguna was only discovering that he had began to freak out. Squall was only nineteen! Sure he was responsible and mature for his age.....but he was nineteen! He was still a kid in Laguna's eyes.  
  
"Is there anything I can help you with?" The jeweler addressed them both. Both Laguna and Squall looked up at the man. Laguna knelt down next to Squall.  
  
"Are you sure about this?" He asked. "This is serious business."  
  
Squall turned to him. "I don't do things on a whim." With that, Laguna remained silent and only watched as his son looked over the delicate objects in the case in front of them. "The third one on the right over here," Squall pointed to it with his index finger.  
  
"This is a very good choice. It is our angel-starfire cut from one of our world renowned tinted diamonds," The jeweler handed the small ring to Squall.  
  
"It looks almost sky blue," Laguna stated as he looked at it as well.  
  
"Its supposed to be like that. We tint our diamonds with one of three colors; a light pink, purple and blue. You'll notice that rather than take away from the diamond, the tinting helps bring out its contours. It is a trademark of our craft. No other shop in Esthar does it, and no other shop in the rest of the world can meet our standards." The jeweler explained.  
  
"What size is this ring?" Squall asked as he let Laguna look at it.  
  
"All of our displays are a size seven. A ring can be fitted to any size you need," The man offered.  
  
"No. Size seven is what I need," Squall answered.  
  
"Very well," The man took the ring from Laguna and went into the back.  
  
There was a short silence between Squall and Laguna as they waited for the man to return. "I was just trying to make sure that you knew what you were doing," Laguna stated as he stared off at the people walking by.  
  
"I love her," Squall said squarely as he stared at a weapons shop across the aisle. Beside him, Laguna turned quickly in surprise.  
  
'Did he just say what I think he said?' Laguna's mind screamed.  
  
"Here you go sir," The jeweler interrupted when he returned. Squall and Laguna both turned to him. "That will be thirty-six hundred gil please." Squall paid the man and noticed with some satisfaction that Laguna was in a state of shock. "Thank you. We appreciate your business." Squall pocketed the small parcel and started to leave, Laguna slowly following after him.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
They ended up in a small restaurant on the top floor. "Want anything to eat?" Squall asked as he found a table near the back.  
  
"Sure," Laguna sat down after Squall did. Both men made their orders a simple soup and sandwich. "So...how are things at Garden?"  
  
Squall shrugged. "I'm not sure anymore. The main problem we're having is a surplus of new students and the lack of rooms to put them in." Squall paused. "We have some contractors from Fisherman's Horizon there making modifications and adding some apartments, but their threatening to walk off the job." The waitress sat their orders in front of them and then gave Laguna a quick smile as she walked off, eyeing Squall in the process. "What was that?"  
  
Laguna chuckled a bit. "News travels fast here in Esthar. Someone must have found out you were here, because I've had six people so far today ask how you were doing."  
  
Squall appeared to concentrate on his soup for a moment. "So...do they know that we're..uh...related?" Squall asked quietly.  
  
"Oh, well most of them probably do. Like I said, news travels fast around here," Laguna answered. Squall didn't respond but fingered the sandwich in front of him. They both ate in silence, and it was Laguna who had to break it. "Is Rinoa all right?"  
  
"She's fine," Squall answered, dreading the direction this conversation was heading.  
  
"If you're sure...she's been sick a lot and refuses to see a doctor," Laguna stated.  
  
Squall allowed an awkward silence to fall between them. "Its just that...she's pregnant." Squall answered as he looked up at his father. Laguna dropped his spoon down into the soup bowl and stared in utter shock at his son.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Son of Sephiroth - Glad you're so happy about it.  
  
Selphie-ish Steph - Glad you liked it so much as well.  
  
Dark Topaz - Here you go....and fine! Don't share your name! I just went out and found my own anyway! (j/k)  
  
Shinning Darkness - Thank you  
  
Verdanii - Thanks  
  
Rinoa36 - You're not the only person to tell me they didn't get an alert. Hmm. I kinda liked the idea of Squall having glasses....don't know why though.  
  
Squall the Stampede - Thanks...that means so much to me. *wipes away tear*  
  
Aratcorien - I'm glad you like Laguna so much in this one. I almost made him play a teeny weeny part, but then I realized I liked how he was coming across. Oh yeah....the Angelo scene is just for you.  
  
Ameli Stoncius - *blinks* Glad you're so excited about it. Hope you like this chapter as much.  
  
Black-Rose 72 - Yeah I made him still have problems. I didn't want it to work perfectly cause that would seem a bit too unbelievable.  
  
Mithrandir505 - Can I take it you didn't want me to stop last chapter? Can I take it you wanted to see this one?  
  
Spawn of Hell - Glad you like it. Thanks.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
There you guys go. Chapter 15. That leaves only 3 chapters to go.....assuming I stick to my outline of course. Hope you guys are paying attention to the details in the conversations and thoughts in my stories because if not you might be missing the links to my other stories. The next chapter will be hard because I have to write it like it needs to be, without crossing too far over into another story. (If you're reading my other fic you may know what I'm talking about.)  
  
Anyway, please read and review. It makes me really happy and encourages me to write more quickly. 


	16. Tender Moments

Disclaimer- Do you guys really think I own Final Fantasy VIII? Didn't think so.  
  
Author's warning - if after this chapter I don't update for at least a week on both of my stories, be patient, my monitor might have finally died.  
  
Author's notes - I haven't a clue how long I worked on this thing, but I think I have it close to the way I wanted it. Hope it reads well. Know that _______change in pov, and ~*~*~*~ is a jump in time.  
  
Tender Moments  
  
He sat stunned. He hadn't really known what Squall was going to say, or he was going to volunteer to tell him the truth. Now Laguna was finding it hard to put words together. What did he want to say? He had to say something, Squall had just shared something with him that he could've withheld. Squall looked at where his spoon had fallen and then at the table. Laguna wanted to say something, but to ask if he were sure would be stupid, and asking if he was sure he was the father would be insulting. Talk about her. She seemed to be Squall's soft spot. Across the table from him, Squall pulled out some gil and sat it down. He had started to rise before Laguna found his voice.  
  
"How far along is she?" Laguna asked as he caught Squall's arm. His son looked down at him in concentration.  
  
"She's past two months. I'm not entirely sure," Squall answered reluctantly. "I just found out a few days ago."  
  
Laguna nodded and rose to follow his son. They walked outside into the vacant streets on their way back to the palace. "How do you feel about the baby?" Laguna asked as he looked out at the horizon line.  
  
Beside him Squall shrugged. "Its mine. I'm not real sure how to feel." Squall answered honestly. "Protective I guess. I'm excited, but I worry too much ."  
  
"About what?" Laguna asked as he strained to look at his son through his hair that the wind was blowing in his face. He had figured out how to get Squall talking and he was going to take advantage of it.  
  
Squall didn't immediately answer, only looked at the ground and kept walking. Laguna was about to assume that they'd ended the conversation whenever Squall finally spoke. "Other people." Laguna was momentarily baffled. "I worry about what other people think. I always have. I know I shouldn't but I do."  
  
Laguna understood what he was saying. "Other people don't matter. If I cared what other people thought, you wouldn't be here today," Laguna saw Squall look up out of the corner of his eye. "I didn't know your mother was pregnant when I left," Laguna gave a weak shrug. "I'm not sure that she did either. She'd worried herself sick after Ellone was taken. Maybe that's what it was, her morning sickness. If it was we didn't realize it. I had to go after Ellone. I didn't want to leave, but I couldn't let them run experiments on Ell, and I couldn't let your mother stay so broken hearted."  
  
It was Squall's turn to be surprised. "I would've went after Ellone too." Laguna looked over at Squall and smiled. He was making progress.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Rinoa stared at the bubble bath longingly. It would be so nice to be able to just soak and relax before they went back to garden. She dropped two towels on the floor next to the tub and then stepped down into the warm bath. She loved how it was built into the floor and seemed to blend in with the rest of the bathroom. She sighed as she rested her head on the lip of the tub and closed her eyes.  
  
"Room for two?" She heard an all to familiar voice ask. She grinned to herself as she stretched her feet out to try and take up as much space as possible.  
  
"I don't know," She answered. She heard grin. Ever since their first shower they'd made it a habit to bathe together. Neither was sure why, it was just nice. She'd actually been waiting for him and was surprised that it had taken him this long to find her.  
  
"You started without me," He complained as he slid into the water beside her and paused. His eyes scanned what he could of her above the level of the bubbles. She had beautiful skin. He noticed she was blushing. At first he wasn't sure why, and then he realized she had never had to worry about what he thought about the way she looked. "Don't tell me you've decided to get bashful now," He raised a brow. She laughed sheepishly and looked towards the bubbles. Grabbed a hold of her waist and pulled her towards him. "You're beautiful."  
  
"Thanks," She still continued to look a little embarrassed. She leaned on his shoulder, allowing the water to rise up close to her shoulders. He softly stroked her hair as she laid there.  
  
"Hey Rin," He said as he allowed his hand to fall into the water.  
  
"Hmm?" She mumbled as she stretched her legs and then wrapped her arms around his waist.  
  
"I would've been lost without you," He confessed. She looked up at him with her dark eyes. "You've helped me find where I need to be. You taught me how to love," He paused. "And I love you. I um, used to worry about what other people thought all the time. When I'm with you, none of that matters. You make me stronger." She stared silently, hanging on his words. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you....and raise this child together." He was nervous and he could tell that he had her undivided attention. "Um....Rinoa Heartilly-Caraway...will you marry me?" With his hand that was propped up on the edge of the tub he handed her a small box. With his other hand he slowly opened it for her. She stared in disbelief at the silver ring with its blue diamond. She finally smiled and pulled the ring free. Squall carefully took it from her and slid it on her left hand.  
  
She laughed lightly and then cried as she examined the ring and then looked up at him. "Yes," She answered as she kissed him. He released the breath he didn't realize he was holding and kissed her back. "Can we get married before the baby's born?"  
  
"Yeah," Squall answered. "We can do it as soon as you want."  
  
"How about a week from tomorrow?" Rinoa suggested. Squall looked a little surprised by how soon the date was but he nodded in agreement. "I can't wait to have your name," She smiled.  
  
He smiled in response but then let it falter. "Can we talk about that part?" He asked her and received a confused look in return.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The next morning...  
  
Squall and Rinoa walked down the vacant halls of Garden. The students were more than likely in their classes already. He took in the sight of the fish carved fountains and the plants growing over the lips of the ledges. It was like he was seeing garden for the first time. All the colors in the flooring and on the walls were almost too bright for his eyes. At least all the colors were but red. They passed a few SeeDs in the halls that smiled and nodded to him. He cast Rinoa a confused look. Did they know about the surgery's outcome? How? His thoughts immediately shifted to Laguna and Ellone. He shook his head as he turned into the main dormitory hall and stopped suddenly. Rinoa bumped into his side and then looked to where he was looking.  
  
"Oh my gosh," She whispered. "Those are for you," She stated. Squall didn't say anything but an unsure frown spread across his face and then gradually turned to a weak smile.  
  
"They're flowers," He stated bluntly. Rinoa rolled her eyes as she pulled him closer to his room.  
  
"They're pretty flowers," She said as she picked up on of the many arrangements sitting on the floor at the base of the door. "And look, none of them are red so you can see them clearly." He stared down at where she was crouched down and smiled. He slid his card key through the slot as he helped her stand with his other hand. She slid her arm through his and rested her head on his shoulder. Squall noticed out of the corner of his eye a few SeeD members who cast them a curious glance but then turned away. "Oh my."  
  
Squall turned his attention to his room at her word and was surprised by the interior of his room. He had only seen more flowers in the field near the orphanage. His once bland and efficiently organized room had been transformed into a flower garden. There were bouquets and arrangements lining the walls and covering his bed and dresser. On the desk was a box, filled with letters addressed to him. He stepped in the room and slowly made his way to the desk. Judging by the handwriting the letters were from the younger students. He turned to Rinoa who was still looking around at all the flowers.  
  
"Wow," Her voice barely muffled a laugh. "You're room's so....pretty."  
  
He grinned at her statement. "You could say that." A small object hanging by the door caught his attention. He reached over and pulled it off its hook.  
  
"What is that?" Rinoa asked.  
  
"An apartment key," He answered as he looked down at the arrangement in front of him. He flipped open the card and smiled. Rinoa read it aloud over his shoulder.  
  
"Squall, Selphie burst in my room at ten last night yelling something about getting a call from Laguna. Glad to hear the surgery helped. I didn't really want to get you flowers, but on such short notice what could I have done? Me and Zell moved all the stuff inside cause it was taking up half the hall. Hope you don't mind. At least with the first apartment done you'll have room to put all the flowers huh? These dorms are kinda crowded. Anyway, its good to hear you're doing better. I have to go, Toby just woke up." Rinoa pulled the card from Squall's grasp and reread it to herself.  
  
"I need to make a call," Squall said as he picked up the receiver and rang Cid. "This is Squall...is this the first apartment key? What about the others? A few more days? No, I don't care about the worker status right now. You're still running things not me. Just don't let them walk off the job." Squall hanged up the phone and turned to Rinoa. She stared at him knowingly and smiled.  
  
"I think he'll like it," She said as she tucked some hair behind her ear. "He needs it more than us." Squall stood baffled by how she read his mind. "Sorceress remember?" A sly grin crossed her features as she stepped towards him and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Go on, I'll be here." Squall nodded and then left the room, stepping over Angelo who was still sniffing the arrangements outside the dorm. The halls were unusually quiet making Squall more than a little uneasy. Ahead he could hear a few conversations as he continued walking. He stopped at the door towards the end of the hall and knocked. He waited about ten seconds and then proceeded to knock again, but the door slid open thus preventing him.  
  
"My someone's impatient," Irvine said as he motioned for Squall to come in. Squall looked around at how small his friend's room was. His gaze then fell on Zell and the bundle he had in his lap.  
  
"Hey man!" Zell shouted as he hopped off the bed, putting the small boy on the floor in the process. "How're the eyes?"  
  
"Better," Squall said. "How are your arms?"  
  
Zell pulled off his long sleeved shirt and let Squall look over his finally heeled lacerations. "It took forever for them to heal," Zell stated as Squall turned his right arm over and frowned. From the inside of Zell's wrist around to nearly the crook of his elbow was one massive scar. The skin on his left arm looked a slight shade darker than the rest around a series of small scars that went from his forearm up to his bicep. "These are nothing compared to what's on my leg," Zell nodded down to his leg. Squall followed his gaze and stared at the pinkish looking scars that ran diagonally up his shin and around the back of his knee. He winced at how bad that probably hurt. "Ma freaked out, but its healed up now." Squall didn't say anything, but turned to them both.  
  
"Can you guys come with me?" Squall asked.  
  
"Sure," Zell answered.  
  
"Yeah, if I can bring Toby," Irvine nodded down to the little boy that was looking up at Squall through curious hazel eyes. Squall just stared back at him, partially in shock that there was a small child gawking at him that he hadn't known existed before the accident.  
  
"Dah who he?" The little boy backed away from Squall and then took a firm hold of Irvine's leg. Squall watched as Irvine picked up the boy and pointed at him.  
  
"That's your Uncle Squall."  
  
Squall froze at the statement. Uncle? He shook it out of his head and stepped hastily out of the room, followed by the two SeeDs.  
  
"So...where we going?" Zell asked.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Squall unlocked the apartment door and stepped inside. The others followed him into the first room where they all stood silently. Squall gazed around at the room he was standing in. It was twice the size of his dorm room and he knew that it was only the living room. He looked through the doorway to his right where he found the kitchen. He was almost half tempted to ignore his initial reason for bringing them here, but then he heard Irvine cry something out about there being two bedrooms and he felt guilty. He turned and made his way towards his voice.  
  
"Hey guys," Squall shouted to his two friends that were now in another room. He walked down the hall until he found them now exploring the bathroom. "Guys?" Both Irvine and Zell looked up at him. "Can I ask you two a favor?"  
  
"Shoot," Irvine said as he pulled a roll of toilet paper out of his son's grasp. The baby cried in protest but soon became preoccupied with trying to look down into the bathtub.  
  
"Anything," Zell agreed. Squall paused before he proceeded.  
  
"Rinoa and I are getting married," Squall looked down at the floor. "And I was wanting to know if you two would be my groomsmen." When he finally decided to look up at them he was greeted by two equally disturbing looks.  
  
Irvine's face was laced in disbelief. "You... are getting married," Irvine's face twisted into a grin. "Ah that's so sweet!" The cowboy patted Squall's back roughly and then used his right arm to hook Squall's neck and head to pull him into a clumsy one-handed hug. "Course I will."  
  
Zell on the otherhand had stared in pure shock before he broke into a broad smile. "Oh my gosh. Ah man.....you're really getting married?" Zell paused. "You know I'll be there." Squall smiled at their statements. "So, when's the wedding?"  
  
"A week from today on the Quad," Squall answered.  
  
Both of his friends stepped back in surprise. "One week!" They said in unison.  
  
"That's when Rinoa wants it," Squall stated. Zell nodded knowingly and pulled out his ringing cell phone.  
  
"Be right back," He stepped out into the hall. Now alone with Squall, Irvine cast him a knowing look. Squall didn't look directly at him. Instead he looked at the little boy that was now approaching him. Squall walked out of the bathroom and into the living room. Irvine followed him as he grabbed Toby's arm to guide him. Squall walked across the unfurnished room and opened the blinds to its large window. He could hear Zell's heavy footsteps as he entered the room behind him after Irvine and his son. Squall leaned on the trim of the window and looked out.  
  
"There's something else," Irvine stated as he picked up Toby and put him on his hip. Squall slowly turned to them.  
  
"Rinoa wants the wedding to be soon so that its not obvious that she's pregnant," Squall's voice came out barely audible but both of his friends caught it. Zell dropped his phone in disbelief. The cracking of the phone's case snapped Irvine out of his shock.  
  
"Are you serious?" Irvine asked. Squall nodded uneasily. "Congratulations man." Irvine took Squall's hand and shook it. Squall looked over at Zell who was still in a state of utter shock and then looked back to Irvine.  
  
"I have to go," Squall stated as he pulled out the key to the apartment and placed it in Irvine's hand. He just nodded and cast Toby a look before he walked off.  
  
________________________________________________________________________  
  
Laguna lay staring at the ceiling in the room he'd reserved solely for Squall and Rinoa. He rolled over at the sound of soft footsteps on the cold marble.  
  
"Uncle?" Ellone asked as she stood next to the bed. "Is something wrong?"  
  
Laguna lay silently as he thought about the day's happenings. He closed his eyes and ran his hands through his hair. "I was actually making progress with Squall and now it doesn't matter."  
  
Ellone sat down next to him. "Why do you say that? He had to leave."  
  
"He really opened up and then left!" Laguna swung his arm out to try and magnify his statements significance. He stood up abruptly and paced the floor. "Maybe I responded wrong," Laguna's voice dropped.  
  
"Uncle," Ellone slid off the bed and followed him. "What are you talking about?"  
  
He shook his head as he leaned on the vanity. "I was almost so close to him. Did he want me to be more parental? I thought by trying to be supportive..." Ellone stood there, a confused expression on her face. "He didn't have to leave. He could've stayed, as long as he'd wanted." Ellone watched as her uncle rested his chin on his hands and stared off at something across the room.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Verdanii - Glad you like the chapter.  
  
aratcorien - *bows* glad you appreciate the angelo scene. Glad you think so highly of the way I have made Squall act. Thank you for your kind reviews.  
  
Ameli Stoncius - Glad you're so into my story. Glad you like my subtle hints..do you think you're catching them all? *raises brow* I'll let you know when I get the package.  
  
Son of Sephiroth - I coulda made Laguna act differently, but I'm trying to make it seem like he's trying to hold on to what little relationship they have.  
  
Dark Topaz - Here you go.  
  
Avon Loire - Thank you. This story is my baby. Not literally, but it is my prized creation up to now at least.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Chapter 16. You guys know what that means....there's only two chapters left. You guys may really freak out when I tell you that I haven't really got a sequel planned out. I don't know how all of you feel. I do have a few random ideas..but who knows. I'm going to concentrate of Leather-bound Secret for a while, but then what do you guys want to see? My Quistis, Zell, or Seifer story? I've got story lines for them all I just can type that fast. And is this story really rated R? Anyway, please review and I'll update as soon as I can. 


	17. Much Deserved Contentment

Disclaimer: *Guest speaker stands up* "Hi, my name is Dante. Since Twin- Lance can't talk due to a sinus infection I guess its up to me to say that she doesn't own Final Fantasy VIII or any of the characters. She doesn't own me either, I'm actually the property of Ameli Stoncius on loan for a day."  
  
Author's note - Okay, this was oddly the easiest chapter thus far, with the exception that the ending was nearly impossible. Thoughts are '...' spoken words "..." and lapses in time are ~*~*~*~ If you don't know that by now.....I bet you were confused at various parts in the story. Oh yeah, my goal is to get at least both of my stories updated before my monitor goes out. So if you don't hear from me for a long while......my monitor is probably dead. And the chapter you've either looked forward to or dreaded, the official ending.  
  
Much Deserved Contentment  
  
Squall gingerly massaged the bridge of his nose between his eyes. General Caraway was definitely trying his nerves. He stood up from his seat at the desk, picked the phone up off the floor and placed it on the night stand. Soft sobs were coming from behind the bathroom door. Squall stared at the phone angrily, instinctively knowing what was wrong. He knocked gently and listened as she tried to stop her quiet crying. He imagined right about now she was wiping at her eyes profusely.  
  
"Rinoa?" He said softly. She didn't answer, but he heard her try and choke back another sob. He tried the knob and was surprised that the door was unlocked this time. She didn't look up from where she sat on the counter top. Seeing her like this hurt him. Her head bowed down and resting in her hands gave her a weak defeated look. He stood in front of her and wrapped his arms around her small frame. She rested her head on his shoulder and draped her arms around his neck. "Shh," Squall tried to comfort her. "Stop crying. It may be affecting the baby." At his statement she calmed down and looked up at him through troubled eyes.  
  
"It never really bothered me that we didn't get along, but that was before I realized that he didn't care," Her voice suggested that she was about to burst out crying again. He scooped her up in his arms and carried her to the bed.  
  
"Maybe you should rest up for a while. Don't worry about him, he just needs time," Squall assured her. 'I hope.' She nodded, and he waited until she had drifted off to sleep before he pulled out his cell phone. "Are we still stationed outside Deling? Good. Hey Nida....thanks for keeping the president occupied." Squall walked outside and hurried to the parking garage. He unlocked one of the newer SeeD sport utility vehicles and slid behind the wheel. To his surprise the passenger door opened and Zell slid in beside him. "What're you doing?"  
  
"As best man not only do I have to stand next to you tomorrow, but I have to make sure you make it to the ceremony," The normally ecstatic blonde fastened his seatbelt. "Someone has to make sure that Caraway doesn't try to kill you or anything." Squall shot him a skeptical glance. "Come on man! Where else are you sneaking off to?" Squall turned his attention to the keys in his hand. "I'm serious! Even father's who claim not to care are protective of their daughters." Squall shook his head and turned on the ignition. "Seatbelt man." Squall inwardly groaned, this was going to be a long ride.  
  
The entire way to the mansion, Squall tried to figure out what he was going to say. Thanks to Zell he was now beginning to grow more than a little apprehensive about talking to the General. When they were finally admitted through the gates, Squall put the suv in park and stepped out slowly. Zell followed his lead as he knocked on the door. The little old maid that Squall had met on a few occasions smiled warmly at him.  
  
"Good evening Squall," She led him into one of the sitting rooms. "What brings you here? And how is Ms. Rinoa doing?"  
  
"You're not welcome here Commander," An all too familiar voice interrupted the maid. "Hazel, please continue with your duties." She nodded apologetically and left the two teenagers with the General. Squall stood up and stepped towards the older man.  
  
"Sir, why won't you give your daughter away tomorrow?" Squall asked.  
  
Caraway laughed to himself as he leaned against the desk behind him. "Haven't you taken enough from her Leonhart? Or should I say Loire?" At his statement Squall narrowed his eyes. He wasn't sure what was more surprising, that the general would suggest that he take advantage of Rinoa or that he was a Loire. The confused expression on his face changed to a defensive one.  
  
"Taken?" Squall asked as tried to recover from being called a Loire.  
  
"I know that she's pregnant," The General stood up and stared at Squall. "And I know who you are. I'm not completely stupid. Not only do you resemble him, but I have my contacts in Esthar that have confirmed your real name."  
  
"So you won't go," Squall stated bluntly.  
  
"You're father always had a part of Julie's heart that I could never gain and I'll be damned if I lose my daughter to a Loire as well."  
  
"You lost her along time ago, with Julie," Squall crossed his arms. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Zell was growing nervous. Caraway grabbed Squall's shirt and pulled him closer.  
  
"That's none of your concern! Listen boy, I entrusted her safety with you. Now she's pregnant. And by a Loire for that matter," Caraway released his shirt and pushed him away. Squall crossed his arms and nodded.  
  
"This is all about a man who's name I don't even share and didn't even know existed until a few months ago," Squall shook his head. "Don't go. No one's making you. But you're hurting Rin more than you know." Caraway looked agitated by his comment. "So help me if you don't show up tomorrow, don't ever come to see her or our child. You won't be admitted in or tolerated." Squall stared the taller man down, and for the first time in his life wanted to inflict some serious harm on someone.  
  
"Is that a threat?" The General asked in a regal tone.  
  
Squall merely nodded. "If you love her you'll be there. If not," Squall hesitated at the next words. "My father has already offered to walk her down the aisle." Squall noticed with some satisfaction that Caraway paled. Without another word, Squall walked past an equally pale Zell. "Let's go."  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The Quad had long since been repaired and elaborately decorated for the occasion. Most of the fold out chairs had already been filled as everyone waited for the ceremony to begin.  
  
Squall shifted his weight uneasily. Security had been increased and was keeping an eye out for General Caraway, assuming he'd show. Squall noticed with some dissatisfaction that Laguna wasn't seated in the crowd. He inwardly cursed that Caraway wasn't there and then turned to the sound of Zell's heavy footsteps.  
  
"He's here," Zell said a little out of breath as he made his way past Nida and Irvine. "For a second it looked like he wanted to chew Laguna out, but then security arrived and he cooled down." Squall looked past him and to where Laguna was sitting down next to Ellone. He sighed in relief but silently hoped that the General wouldn't say anything to Rinoa about his visit last night. From his seat in the crowd, Laguna flashed Squall two thumbs up causing him to look away in embarrassment. Over the crowd he could hear Ellone chastising her Uncle. Music began to play as Quistis slowly made her way down the aisle. Much to everyone's surprise, Fujin followed her, obviously nervous about wearing a lilac dress in public. Squall cast Zell a quick glance and noticed his friend was grinning like a mad man. Selphie followed Fujin as she took her place in front of the crowd.  
  
After what seemed like a short eternity, Rinoa stepped into view, escorted by her father. Hands clasped tightly behind his back, Squall silently wished that they would hurry up. At least he wasn't center of attention, for the moment. He inhaled deeply as he watched Caraway lift her veil and kiss her cheek softly. Once her veil was back in place she stepped up to Squall's side and smiled. He smiled faintly at her and then directed his attention to the minister. To Rinoa, the holy man was deliberately taking as long as possible just to spite her. She had waited for this day her entire life, and now she was so excited and nervous at the same time she could barely contain herself. She looked over to her husband to be and smiled.  
  
"Rinoa Heartilly Caraway do you take Squall to be your lawfully wedded husband?" The man asked.  
  
She noticed Squall's eyes almost seemed to beg her to answer, causing her to melt on the inside. "I do."  
  
"Squall Leonhart Loire do you take Rinoa to be your lawfully wedded wife?" Squall couldn't help but notice the sounds of surprise that arouse from the crowd.  
  
"I do," Squall smiled as he looked at Rinoa's face.  
  
"Then I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride," The man paused to let Squall raise her veil. When their lips met, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer. As they pulled away from one another, the minister continued, "Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you Mr. and Mrs. Squall Loire." They made their way back up the aisle and Squall noticed with some satisfaction that Laguna was still sitting stunned. His gaze then fell to Caraway who just out of view of Rinoa was beginning to cry. As they neared the back, he saw Rinoa smile off to someone to his left. Squall turned and was shocked to see Seifer smile in return and then clap lightly with the crowd as he nodded to Squall. Squall nodded back, not wanting to evoke any ill feelings.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
The reception wasn't as bad as he thought it would be. For the most part, most of the guests were entertained with eating as much as possible. Most of the guests that is, not all of them. Zell unfortunately happened to be one of the exceptions. Squall watched with mild contempt as the blonde hurried over to their table and practically fell on top of it. Rinoa jumped a bit at the sound of his palms against the hard wood.  
  
"Come on! What's the hold up man! Let's cut the cake!" Zell motioned for them to get up. Rinoa giggled as she wrapped her fingers around Squall's arm and pulled him up from his seat. "All right everybody! They're cutting the cake!" Zell shouted over everyone in the room. The room fell dead silent as Squall covered Rinoa's hand on the knife's handle and cut two pieces out of the large white cake. Squall noticed with some discomfort that everyone in the room was hanging on his every movement. He turned to Rinoa afraid that cutting the cake wasn't as simple as he'd believed.  
  
"Now we get to feed each other," She said in a low voice.  
  
"What!?" Squall tried to mask his disbelief but failed.  
  
"Come on! Just shove it in her face!" Irvine shouted out over everyone else. Squall turned to him.  
  
"No!" He shouted back.  
  
"Time to eat Hun," Rinoa said in a mischievous voice. Squall turned to her just in time to get half of the piece of cake shoved in his mouth while the other half was smeared onto his chin. He coughed a few times and then looked at Rinoa. She started to back away, but he wrapped one hand around her waist to keep her close.  
  
"Hope you're hungry," He said so that only the people closest to him could hear it.  
  
"Squall no!" She squealed as he shoved a piece of cake into her mouth. Now they were even. After she'd finished swallowing her piece, she wiped the cake crumbs and icing from her fingers and then wrapped her arms around Squall's neck and gave him a long kiss, icing and all.  
  
"Whoo hoo! You go girl!" Irvine shouted over the cheers of the crowd. Squall just shook his head in disbelief at what he was hearing. "That shot was beautiful!" Squall groaned when he realized that his friend had the camcorder.  
  
"Here," Rinoa laughed lightly. He turned to her half expecting her to try and do something else mischievous to him but instead she wiped off his chin with a napkin. "Come on. We have to have the first dance you know."  
  
Somehow Squall knew she was going to say that. He allowed himself to be dragged across the floor in front of the two-hundred plus crowd. All eyes were on him. He could feel them. It was obvious that Rinoa was an angel whenever it came to nearly everything, and people were just waiting for him to mess up. He would show them otherwise tonight. Rinoa however had other plans and wanted to settle with a simple dance. Squall willingly complied and led her around the ballroom in a sequence of soft and slow spins and twirls. He could feel everyone's gaze upon him, but he couldn't shift his eyes from her face. He was still surprised every morning whenever he awoke to see her lying beside him. As much as he hated to admit it, he owed Dr. Odine, or maybe it was his father. He wasn't sure, but either way he was thankful that he had his sight. Thanks to them he'd never miss seeing some of the most important things in his life. He smiled at the thought as Rinoa smiled in response.  
  
'Can she tell what I'm thinking?' Squall wondered.  
  
"Maybe," She whispered. His gaze shifted from one of contentment to shock.  
  
"I thought you said that you couldn't read minds," He asked.  
  
"I was wrong," She said as they came to a stop.  
  
After their first dance was over, General Caraway surprised Squall by stepping in. Rinoa cast him a reassuring look as she took her father's hand and moved away from his side. Left alone, Squall walked over to their table and sat down. He was only alone for a few minutes before he heard someone else pull up a chair next to him. Squall turned to see Laguna.  
  
"Hey," Laguna said as he leaned on the table in front of him. Squall nodded nervously. "What's wrong? The hardest part is over now." Laguna nudged Squall a bit but didn't even gain a response from him. "I don't know what's going through your mind right now....but I uh, want to let you know that you're both always welcome at my house." Squall nodded unsurely and then looked at the table cloth. He could feel Laguna's eyes on him.  
  
"Thanks," Squall said as he watched Rinoa start towards him. She sat down on the side of him opposite of his father and leaned on his shoulder. "For everything."  
  
Laguna looked a little surprised but then smiled in response. Squall watched as he looked over at Rinoa and then rose. "I guess I'll leave you two alone now," He smiled weakly as he turned and left.  
  
Now left alone, Squall wrapped his arm around Rinoa's shoulder. She smiled at the simple gesture and looked up into his soft eyes. "Squall Loire," She stated. "It has a nice ring to it." He smiled as he leaned over and kissed her. He sat back and admired the way the candle light shown on her face as he tried to imagine what their future together would be like. He had ceased to be a dreamer after Ellone was taken from him as a child but Rinoa was opening that part of him up as well as his heart. He broke out into an all out smile for the first time since he was very small and for the first time in his life, he didn't worry who was watching.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Dark Topaz - Here you go.  
  
DarkWolf88 - Hey! A new reader! Thanks for the review! And yes Squall is hot.  
  
Rinoa36 - With Selphie handling decorations, and Quistis and Edea handling everything else, of course its possible! I mean Squall has an entire Garden at his disposal.....he can pull it off. And yes he does talk more, but I tried to make it a progression.  
  
Verdanii - Sorry....no honey moon. At least not one that you guys will read about. Its just assumed to have happened.  
  
Tai-Style - Glad you're enjoying it. And hey! Aren't you a new reader to? *smiles*  
  
Optical Goddess - Yes, Irvine got the apartment. I didn't elaborate because that would take away from my other story and it would sound like I was just repeating myself. As far as Laguna goes......I was trying to hint that he had tried to get Squall to stay longer and was afraid that Squall was going to just dismiss the few days they had together as just another memory.  
  
Ameli Stoncius - Yes, Laguna is falling into his role quite nicely without totally alienating Squall. The end was an add on that I realized I needed when I looked at the epilogue. BTW, thanks for the package! I love you! You're such a story saver! Now I can write with more confidence. *smiles* And thanks for lending me Dante! I put him to good use.  
  
DBH - That is exactly what I was thinking of when I wrote the flower scene. As for Laguna, he'll get the hint.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
That's it guys. This is the official ending of this story. *sits back and sighs* Hope you guys liked it. If you want to read more there will be an epilogue that will more than likely come out before the next chapter of Leather-bound Secret. So I guess you can look at it as there will be one more chapter.  
  
Come on! After I finish this and Leather-bound Secret what am I supposed to post? I only got one response from Ameli Stoncius. As of now it looks like my third fic will be centered around Quistis. If you'd rather read about someone else, let me know. In the mean time, please review! It might encourage me to post the epilogue faster. *puppy dog eyes* 


	18. A Complete Family

Disclaimer: The game and the characters aren't mine, but this story and plot definitely are.  
  
Author's note - What can I possibly say? I have never updated this quickly before. This is it. The final part of Darkened Ice. I might cry now. I don't want it to be over. I really enjoyed making this story and I got really involved in it. I hope you guys enjoy this last part. I guess the only thing to remember is this takes place well after the last chapter....but I think you can figure it out.  
  
Epilogue: A Complete Family  
  
He remembered the night vividly. The moonlight filtered through the sheer material of the blinds casting a pale glow on their bed. He'd been unable to sleep and from what he could tell she'd been sleeping restlessly. He opened his eyes to admire the contours of her face the moon had illuminated. She was sweating. He automatically checked to see if she had a fever. Under his hand, she turned her head to the side as a weak groan escaped her lips. Her face contorted with pain as her eyes shot open. It was at that moment that he realized what was going on.  
  
"Squall! Its time!" She cried out to him but he was already a step ahead of her. He pulled on an old pair of pants over his boxers and then his boots. She sat up slowly and pushed away the comforter. Squall had thought he was ready for this moment. He was wrong. He fumbled with the phone as he tried to dial the infirmary. It seemed to take near an eternity for Dr. Kadowaki to answer.  
  
"Rin's gone into labor," Squall said quickly as he clutched the phone tightly with one hand and tried to steady her with his other as she stood up. "We're on our way." He hung up the phone, slid on his glasses and helped Rinoa put a robe on. She took his hand and leaned on him for support as he helped her through the deserted halls.  
  
Dr. Kadowaki had responded with such calmness that it nearly drove him mad. How could she be so calm? He had been nervous the entire way down the hall and even for the first few hours in the infirmary. But now that it was time, he was on the verge of panic. Rinoa's loosely braided hair was drenched in sweat, as was her face and palms. He didn't know what to do or how to react. He knew she was picking up on his feelings because she tightened her grip on his hand and pulled him down so that he was sitting at her bedside.  
  
"I need you here," Her voice became sharpened by another contraction. At her encouragement he remained at her side, barely keeping from crying. He didn't know what to do. Should he be doing more? "You're doing just fine," Her voice came out weak and strained. She took a few ragged breaths, further worrying him. His heart had nearly stopped when he heard their baby's first cries. He couldn't see it, Kadowaki was holding it out of view while she cleaned it up. His eyes then drifted to his young wife. She lay practically exhausted in his arms. His eyes began to fill with tears; she'd made it where his mother hadn't. She could sense his relief and opened her eyes.  
  
"You did it," His voice was barely a whisper as he kissed her forehead. He grimaced as she released the grip she had on his right hand and forearm. A small smile graced her lips as she took a few deep breaths and lay back on her pillow.  
  
Dr. Kadowaki returned shortly after and gently placed the small infant in Rinoa's arms. "Congratulations, its a boy," Kadowaki smiled as she began cleaning up. Squall admired the mother and son from his spot at the bedside and didn't volunteer to do anything more.  
  
He leaned a little closer to get a better look at the infant. "Want to see your Daddy?" Rinoa smiled as she took hold of one of Squall's arms and pulled him closer. He hesitantly leaned down to get a better look.  
  
"Why don't you hold him?" Kadowaki asked. Squall tried to decline but he discovered he wasn't given a choice. Before he'd realized it, the doctor was placing the small child in his arms and instructing him on how to hold him. Squall waited until she'd left before he lightly brushed the thin blue blanket back from his son's face and looked over his pink skin. He would have dark hair, more than likely like his mother's. Squall noticed with a small bit of satisfaction that they would have the same nose. He grinned sheepishly as the small infant cracked its eyes open just long enough for Squall to notice that they were mismatched. "He's just a little early, which is why he has a low birth weight. But that's okay though. Other than his weight he is a very healthy baby."  
  
Squall had been protective of his son when it came to everything. He brought his mind back to reality and out of the past when he heard a pair of inconsistent footsteps carefully making their way down the stairs. There was a loud knock at the door that momentarily diverted his attention.  
  
"Squall can you get that?" Rinoa called from the room above his head. "I think its your father." He paused at her statement. He'd remembered how Laguna had responded very clearly. The poor guy hadn't a clue he was a grandfather whenever Squall had called him over for an alleged dinner. Squall smiled at the thought as he remembered the older man's face whenever he'd stepped into the room holding the baby. It was that day that Squall realized how truly soft hearted the man was. Squall had hesitantly let the older man hold his son but he didn't let him get more than an arm's length away.  
  
He opened the door to reveal his father and sister. Ellone immediately went in search of her nephew while Squall and Laguna were left alone by the front door. Squall motioned for him to enter and closed the door behind him. He wasn't surprised whenever Laguna pulled him into a hug. It was always something he was never prepared for even though he knew it was going to happen.  
  
"How are you doing Son?" Laguna said as he stepped back from Squall.  
  
"Just fine Dad," Squall answered as he smiled faintly. He then lead the older man down the hall and into the kitchen, where Ellone was trying to talk to his son. The two and a half year old immediately ran over to Squall, wanting to be held. Squall picked the small boy up and looked over his features. His dark hair contrasted with his right, pale blue eye, and at the same time complimented his left green one.  
  
"Pepaw!" The boy cried out as he reached for Laguna.  
  
"Hey there Tempest," Laguna smiled as he lifted the boy from Squall's arms and held him on his hip. Rinoa came down the steps quickly and took hold of Squall's arm. He looked a bit confused as she dragged him across the kitchen. She whispered in his ear and he had to grab hold of the counter to keep from fainting.  
  
"What's going on?" Ellone asked as she stood next to Laguna. Both of their eyes fell on Squall who looked at a loss for words. He turned to Rinoa and pulled her into a hug so that he could hide his surprise from their view.  
  
"Are you sure?" His voce was muffled by her hair. She laughed lightly as she pushed him back so she could see his face.  
  
With her arms still around Squall's neck, she turned to Laguna and Ellone. "We're going to have another baby," She smiled and cried at the same time. Squall took his hand and wiped away her tears. He then kissed her gingerly, unaware of their audience. "I love you Squall Loire," She said just before his lips captured hers again. He smiled as he continued to kiss her.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
Ameli Stoncius - *shakes head and smiles* Sometimes I worry about you. Nevertheless, you've been a faithful stalker. Thanks for all of the advice and reviews. I really appreciate it.  
  
aratcorien - Thank you for your encouraging reviews and ideas. Thank you for your support. As far as Ellone goes....I guess she figured out what was going on eventually. lol I didn't forget about her. Only a few select people were told about Rinoa's pregnancy so that it wouldn't look like that was the only reason they were getting married. I just figured it could be understood that sometime either before or after they were married Laguna would tell her. As far as the Caraway-Loire thing. I waited 17 chapters to write that. It was so much fun to write because I just always felt like there should be some kind of tension there.  
  
DBH - I liked what Squall had to say as well. I was tempted to go further but I didn't want to go too far or make Squall look too aggressive. It would've upset Rinoa. Thanks for reviewing, I really appreciate it.  
  
Rinoa36 - thanks for all of your reviews.....and you sincerest honesty on your opinion of Squall's name. lol It does sound funny. Even I'll admit that. But, its something he chose to do for Laguna. So I guess its sentimental? Is that the right word?  
  
************************************************************************  
  
The epilogue is now complete. The story is finally complete. Hope it wasn't OOC. But then again....how can you tell if its OOC? I've gradually changed Squall so much over the approximate three years and two months this spans over. I really hope that you guys enjoyed this story. I really enjoyed making it....and reading your reviews. I'm not really sure what to say, I am really pleased with the outcome of this story. I was a little worried for a while. Chapters 5 through 12 were a challenge, I felt like I might have been getting off topic or losing my touch. But you all helped me stay on task. Thanks. I really appreciate your reviews and support.  
  
*looks back at last chapter* I used "really" a lot didn't I? Maybe I need a thesaurus.  
  
Anyway, I hope you guys will give my other story as much attention as you have this one. I'm still not sure which story to do after my second one is finished. It seems that right now there is a tie. One of you wants to see a Quistis fic (which by the way is the most developed) and another one of you wants to see the Zell fic. Anyone else have any preferences? Anyone? Or do I need to flip a quarter? *digs through pocket*  
  
I want to say thank you at least one more time before I submit this last portion of Darkened Ice. ( Ameli Stoncius.......I know you have to be pulling your hair out by now at my over use of the phrase 'Thank you" ) I appreciate all of your reviews and would be even happier if you'd review this last addition. Thanks. 


End file.
